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Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

reuters.com

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Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#161

Post by Mizza »

api wrote: post #99
Mizza wrote: post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Incels call this "hypergamy": https://incels.wiki/images/thumb/c/c8/C57f84720fff59cf295616... Although misogynistic incels are obviously abhorrent, I believe that they're probably right in their assessment of their own social status. It just seems like rather than trying to better themselves, they turn it into outward hatred. I've also seen calls by right-wing thought leaders for "enforced monogamy," which obviously…

Making the world flat and hyper-connected seems as if it leads to a winner-take-all outcome. Example: putting commerce online created the Amazon monopoly. It's easier than ever to buy from any store you want online, but paradoxically everyone goes to Amazon. This is mostly because everyone goes to Amazon, therefore virtually any product is available there. Only niche products require you to shop elsewhere. So we've p…

I think your last point is absolutely the central paradox of global society. The goal seems pretty clear: brutual transnational neofeudal capitalism with a happy, politically correct face becomes the default universal position that defines the dynamics which subcommunities allowed within that framework interact - eventually, the whole planet becomes California.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#163

Post by joelbluminator »

Vysero wrote: post #47

It's become harder to approach women. Based on my experience, they are far more likely this day in age to reject you than ever before. That coupled with the constant barrage men receive on the sexual misconduct front coupled with the notion that women only want exceedingly wealthy, attractive, muscular men makes it very easy for men to slink away into their rooms after work, and play video games all night rather than…

Most women are people just like you, they want a real relationship and want love. I know it's shocking, but they're not all after sleeping with muscular wealthy men any more than you are with sleeping with an 18 year old blonde with huge breasts. Stop being so superficial and start looking at women as real people.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#164

Post by derefr »

monocasa wrote: post #13
mpfundstein wrote: post #5

are we really surprised? last year a woman called me a sexist because i said 'ladies firsr' on the coffee machine. a friend got problems with hr becahse apparently he stared at some titties in the elevator lol. luckily i am married and had my fair share of partners. but nowadays i would be scared as hell to even take the first step in the club. i mean, i might easily become a toxic male sexual predator exposed on soc…

I think the modern idea isn't that there's no longer a space for dating and sexual encounters; it's that this space isn't work. Work is for work, not finding a wife or mistress or staring at breasts. The club and dating apps is where you go for that. If you and someone you work with both swipe right, then it's fair game. But there's an affirmative, out of work step to getting there.

> The club and dating apps is where you go for that. If you and someone you work with both swipe right, then it's fair game.

And then the awful question arises: how do two people meet who would enjoy one-another, but who mutually abhor immersing themselves in a pool of strangers (i.e. clubs, hook-up culture, etc.)? How do socially-anxious introverts meet other socially-anxious introverts? (Certainly not in meet-up events for common hobbies; they've chosen their hobbies to avoid being around groups of strangers!)

This sort of coupling used to be accomplished mostly either by a societal expectation of an external matchmaker in some cultures (e.g. "arranged marriages" in the Indian parents-play-matchmaker style); or, in the rest, stumbling upon one-another in a forced shared environment, e.g. school, church, or work, and then fraternizing. With the loss of the social expectation of regular church attendance regardless of belief; and then the discouragement of "mixing business and pleasure"; the introvert finds no place where love will come to them. So they remain alone.

Compulsory schooling remains as an avenue, but in Western culture there's increasingly a very strong push toward peerwise age isolation (i.e. being discouraged from fraternization with anyone outside of your year), at least until college; and what remains goes against the apparent romantic preferences of most people of each gender (i.e. almost no teenager wants to date people precisely their own age.)

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#165

Post by Vysero »

codingslave wrote: post #50

This is a widespread societal change that I think most people are completely unaware of. The majority of women are sleeping with the top 10% of men, sometimes only the top 3-5%, with the rest barely getting any at all. the sexual revolution was never about free love or sexual freedom, it was about womens rights to sleep with the few men they are all attracted to. The lower 80% of men instead saw their sexual freedom…

I am not sure I can buy this. Most "hot" guys aren't going to sleep with ugly girls just because the can. Perhaps the OP's answer does not hinge upon that concept, but it certainly seems relevant. I think the issue is much more complex than this, and has far more to do with male insecurity than anything else.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#166

Post by csharptwdec19 »

eigenvalue wrote: post #43
tharne wrote: post #12

They buried the lede here. > Sexual activity was largely unchanged among unmarried women, along with no notable decline among gay men, researchers reported. Basically sex is following the pattern of wealth. Men as a group aren't having less sex, instead there's a winner take all effect where a small number of men are having a lot of sex with a lot of women while a large number of men are having little to no sex. It'l…

I think this is exactly right. Apps like Tinder that normalized online "dating" (before the apps it was much less common among younger people) have allowed the "apex predator" men with good jobs/looks/personalities to have sex on demand with virtually unlimited numbers of women. This has also been made possible because a lot more women are now willing to be in non-exclusive sexual relationships at the beginning when…

> It is these men who are having all the sex. Seems like a powder keg over time as the excluded men become bitter and forced to postpone getting married and starting a family. I believe many of these men will eventually find someone once enough of the women who are now rejecting them face biological realities and are forced to settle if they want to have children.

Yep. The problems will be generational. On one hand you have the possibility that the men are very aware of this problem, and any relationship they find will be tainted by knowing they weren't good enough to party with but good enough to marry.

But more important than that is the time a couple spends actually getting to know each other is greatly cut down. Which then impacts how the children are raised.

I wouldn't be surprised if we see an increase in divorce and/or single family rates over time.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#167

Post by thewarrior »

malcolmgreaves wrote: post #112

A lot of guys are complaining in the thread, with undertones of an expectation of sex Most likely reason I see that would cause this data: the immense social pressure applied to straight women has lessened in the 21st century. A straight woman won't be ostricized at 25 if they don't "have a man." The data suggests that young straight men aren't having as much sex. I postulate that the only reason is that straight men…

But the data also shows that for women the figure is unchanged.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#168

Post by klmadfejno »

tootahe45 wrote: post #70
krapp wrote: post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>If not, go visit a forum for incels and see how happy they are. Incels are a cult of hateful, misogynistic extremists who consider mass murderers like Eliot Rodger to be heroes. Simply not having as much sex as one would prefer, or any at all, does not make one an incel.

> Simply not having as much sex as one would prefer, or any at all, does not make one an incel. It literally does though. You can't change definitions because someone gave the name a bad rep.

Maybe you can use context to differentiate two different meanings of the same word though

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#169

Post by werber »

I find myself fatigued by making the right choice to the point of not making choice in the current gay app climate. I’m actually bored by hook ups, but unable to find a partner who is, but also equally open to being persecutive, together. It feels like the algorithm is just harder now. Or I’m just difficult.

Re: Young U.S. men having a lot less sex in the 21st century, study shows

#170

Post by corpMaverick »

bobthepanda wrote: post #45
mpfundstein wrote: post #28

Earlier quoted context omitted.

its a nice gesture. whats the problem? back in Germany, only 10 years ago, women were super happy about it. now i am getting called a sexist. times change

it can be viewed as patronizing.

You are correct. But many men were educated like that. Because that is what a gentleman does. Same way we were taught to open the door to an older (not old) person as a sign of respect.
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