It worked for Denis Leary, and not just stealing Bill Hick's act. More of a musical thing.
Not being an asshole will make you more money
251–260 of 314 posts
Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money
#252I've met plenty of assholes. They're rich and getting richer.
Being an asshole is like emitting a poison: at certain doses other people are fine. As it increases they become more transactional* until they shut down or let the relationship die. But this doesn't stop a lot from getting rich.
Assholes do get "handled" however. Often it is used against them. But does this matter to them? Probably not to the extent you would expect. A lot of assholes hide their ways until they pounce.
Being an asshole pays well. Does that make it ok? No. Does it matter to them? Likely not: they're assholes.
The real lesson is to learn not to include assholes in your inner circle. And make it hard for them to join or get too close. There are benefits to not being an asshole.
All that said, there are benefits to having an asshole. Shit needs to go through somewhere. And particular people are well suited to it. Let them. Some deals go better when done between assholes.
* Or they're like a hot oven. We will tolerate the heat because we like cookies. But won't leave our hands in there too long or unprotected. We will turn the oven off completely when we don't need cookies. Transaction complete, cut ties. We might come up with ways to reduce exposure down to minimal levels. We'll wear gloves. Less time spent. Or we'll find a better oven with a better door and insulated handles.
Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money
#253Earlier quoted context omitted.
It is supposed to be an international forum, but in practice it is a local group for San Francisco Bay Area. Consider how often articles about housing issues in Bay Area make it to the front page, compared to Vancouver, London, and Tokyo. HN is international in the sense that anyone can access and participate in it. But in practice, mostly SF Bay Area residents do.
I see participatants from all over the world here all the time. They usually qualify things with phrases like "where I'm from" or "in [insert country here]. It's only the Americans that think they're the center of the world. I used to watch this Japanese show "Why did you come to Japan?" where a camera crew hangs out at Narita Airport and ambushes unsuspecting foreigners with that question and try to tag along on the…
I usually cut them slack unless they're jerks about it. A lot haven't even got a passport. That's usually fine as well: The USA is a big place. Not even talking just actual size. There are a lot of people with diverse ways of living and circumstances. But the place is so physically huge you could spend your entire life exploring it and still not run out of places to find new things and people to see and meet.
If it helps, think of every US state as if it was a european country. You might lazily think they are all the same but scratch the surface and there's a lot of difference.
So yeah, its fine for someone to say they're from California. You already know they're from the land of High Fructose Corn Syrup so why be nasty about it?
Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money
#254Earlier quoted context omitted.
It is supposed to be an international forum, but in practice it is a local group for San Francisco Bay Area. Consider how often articles about housing issues in Bay Area make it to the front page, compared to Vancouver, London, and Tokyo. HN is international in the sense that anyone can access and participate in it. But in practice, mostly SF Bay Area residents do.
For those downvoting this comment: this conclusion (that HN's reader base is predominantly based in the SF Bay Area) should be entirely unsurprising given that HN is itself the product of Y Combinator, an accelerator based in the SF Bay Area that (last I checked, and from what I recall back when I worked for a startup that applied) specifically requires its incubatees to relocate (if they're not already there) to the…
It's a fair assumption that a lot of people on HN have SF viewpoint or views at least that partially align with them. Even those of us on the other side of the planet.
As for your downvoters: plenty of people believe they should downvote when they simply disagree. Others believe that downvoting without a comment is fine. These two groups make HN less interesting.
I actually want to know the reason why. Too many people hide behind a downvote and contribute nothing. Meanwhile they are making interesting posts disappear for no good reason. And other comments that are blatantly rubbish are not touched at all.
Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money
#255Earlier quoted context omitted.
* if you have the money and the people prepared for 3)
This point only pertains in places with a poisonous legal system, such as US or UK.
As opposed to... where exactly?
I'm sure I can point at legal systems across the globe that have examples of completely terrible injustice.
Which legal system are you referring to that is significantly not "poisonous"? And why?
Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money
#256"Not being an asshole will make you more money"
Elon Musk, Peter Thiel, Paul Graham, Jack Dorsey, all of AirBNB and Uber's executive staff, Mark Benioff, Larry Ellison and Donald Trump would all beg to differ.
Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money
#257Earlier quoted context omitted.
You must have had your share of weasels during contract negotiations.
I have dealt with some horrible people over the years. It's incredible what they will do to get away with stuff. Standing your ground while maintaining a logical and rational approach is the only way to deal with them. Most of them like a fight, so you simply can't pick one with them.
Assuming there is an external person arbitrating (which is usually the case when dealing with internal politics at least -- one or two levels up from you), it's so important in these cases to stay reasonable. Virtually every single time, the person that likes to fight will cross the line in the hopes of goading you into a fight. But it's exactly at that time that you win. You send a very reasonable email to the arbitrating person saying, "I'm really trying my best to get this working, but I'm having trouble. Could you please give me a hand." Since the arbitrating person really would rather do nothing, they will look at the situation and say, "A is completely reasonable. B is not. B, you need to change."
I remember one time where I was discussing a problem with a manager in another team. Every single email he sent, he CC'd the management 2 levels up. Every single email I sent, I sent directly to him only. My colleague was panicking. He felt that I needed to show my side of the story to upper management or else I would be in trouble.
Eventually the management 2 levels up got frustrated: "Why am I getting all of these emails? Why can't you people sort out this problem yourself?" To which I reasonably replied, "I'm very sorry that you've been bothered, and I'm not sure why this person is being so difficult. Now that you are here, would you mind giving us a hand?" Problem solved.
Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money
#258Telling people what you want and telling others when they screw up is commonly seen as mean behavior in the world today.
But it's hard to be successful if you don't do those things.
Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money
#259Keep in mind that many people become business owners because they are too toxic and conflictive as employees.
Re: Not being an asshole will make you more money
#260Earlier quoted context omitted.
Except this has been tried before and they typically end in one of three outcomes: 1) It was a mistake and it doesn't go to court. 2) It was intentional and it doesn't go to court because the attorney, while still being a piece of shit, understands what option 3 is. 3) It was intentional, it goes to court, and you produce the email evidence showing the attorney agreed to changeset N then sent along changeset N-1, and…
4) Contract gets unknowingly signed and shelved, OP moves jobs and his/her replacement assumes the signed contract is legitimate. Rare, but I've seen it happen. FWIW I completely agree with both you and OP - it's a totally boneheaded move, but you should never underestimate how boneheaded some people (lawyers in particular) can be.
Anecdote/Sample of 1: lawyer friend skipped paying the fine for picking up his kid from the kindergarten 30mins after the closing time. His excuse was "come on what is 30mins?". Kindergarten warned "strike 1" and promised that he either paid the $10 'penalty' (textbook Freakonomics case) or be so much closer to expulsion (Edit: added the Or to conclude the Either).
He didn't pay and promised to sue. His wife was then told that if he sues the kid is out the door. She paid. She never told him. He still thinks "he won". I know many people of all professions can be dicks, but it feels like Lawyers have a greater concentration.