Reasons not to become famous • Hacker News Board

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#411

Post by gist » Mon, Feb 10, 2020, 6:10 PM UTC

paganel wrote: post #337

gist wrote: post #153

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> Healthy happy people simply do not spend much of their time that way. But what if making comments makes you happy? While I don't disagree with the premises of what you are saying I think you are not considering that for some people saying something makes them feel good and they are perfectly mentally sane. I could also say that 'healthy happy people do not spend their time socializing with others at parties' but we…

For what it's worth "mentally sane" and "healthy happy people" can be a little boring in real life, that's why lots of people like myself have decided to spend time arguing with people from the other side of the world on websites like this one or on reddit just because the subjects being argued about are interesting and there's no way you could find a person in your real life that could be interested in said subjects…

Very true. Also words vs. conversation tends to be very efficient although often lacking cues that come with voice or visually. No wasted time and much less boredom from feeling trapped.

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#412

Post by rchaud » Mon, Feb 10, 2020, 6:13 PM UTC

yowlingcat wrote: post #189

econcon wrote: post #86

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>especially if you're a millionaire and can afford a personal trainer and meal-planner. Born to immigrant parents I was always taught to work hard so I ended up with good work ethics and strong willpower - I never skipped training and I was mostly self driven, do not need external encouragement to walk towards my goal. Yes, now people ask how did you achieve this physique? I never tell them it's steroid because who w…

> If other guys around you set expectations of physique not naturally achievable there is not much you can do. I find this thread fascinating because it's almost common knowledge that this is true for women in contemporary society. It should come as no surprise that this is also the case for men. The looks arms race continues.

The irony is compounded by the number of times "Brad Pitt in Fight Club" has been mentioned in this thread. The whole film was a screed against this kind of arms-race thinking of "I need this, this and this, and then finally, I'll have ______".

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#413

Post by rchaud » Mon, Feb 10, 2020, 6:17 PM UTC

umvi wrote: post #314

econcon wrote: post #33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I made lots of money but always felt rejected/ignored by society. So I ended up lonely. I was sold a dream that become financially well off and affluent and women will flock to you - it never happened! I stayed a non smoker, non drinker because I consider these uncessary risks. I don't see any upside Aced the classes, did good in sports but still become Mr. Noone. But lately, I got into body building and started usin…

This seems like a very superficial way of attracting girls. From my experience if you want girls you need experience dating and having an attractive personality which isn't easy. It takes time to be comfortable being yourself around girls. And you don't wait for women to "flock to you". You have to pursue them by asking them on dates.

Reading what he's posted, it doesn't seem like he's interested in dating, but rather hooking up, and fast. Tinder is still the go-to for that, and it is by design a looks-centric platform.

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#414

Post by munificent » Mon, Feb 10, 2020, 6:39 PM UTC

PaulStatezny wrote: post #270

munificent wrote: post #201

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Social anxiety, introversion, and antisociability are all different things that often get conflated. If we replace people with ice cream, I think it works out something like: * Social anxiety: I'm afraid I will choke on the ice cream. * Introversion: Ice cream is fine but I don't really enjoy the flavor. * Anti-social: Ice cream tastes gross. These all manifest in the same visible way — avoiding ice cream — but the c…

Interesting analogy. From my perspective (as an introvert) I would replace the "Introvert" line with: * Introversion: I may or may not enjoy ice cream, but eating very much makes me exhausted. (Or "I feel full after eating just a bit".) From my perspective, your analogy makes the very mistake that the grandparent comment brought up: conflating introversion with not liking social interaction.

Yeah, I like that better too. Especially the second sentence.

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#415

Post by munificent » Mon, Feb 10, 2020, 6:42 PM UTC

DenisM wrote: post #211

munificent wrote: post #199

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> wanting to speak to strangers, breaking silence in a lift - but these have never really sat comfortably with me afterwards. I'll be chewing and ruminating about the imagined mistimed comments or miscued lines for ages. This resonates very strongly with me. I will throw a party, have a great time, and then lay in bed replaying scenes and focusing on every slightly awkward thing I could have done differently. > I hav…

Consider that negative obsessions is a particular case of a more general problem - attention you don’t control.

I think you could "generalize" any pyschological problem to that. Every psychological problem, by definition, means thinking things that are harmful. Thinking requires attention, and if you know they are harmful, presumably it is a lack of control that makes you think them.

But I don't think that's a particularly useful generalization in most cases. Unless a person has general problems controlling their attention, then the likely culprit for negative thoughts is not attention control in general, but something related to why those thoughts in particular are prevalent.

In other words, if you eat rocks, the most likely explanation is pica, not gluttony.

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#416

Post by Strom » Mon, Feb 10, 2020, 8:40 PM UTC

austhrow743 wrote: post #73

eru wrote: post #57

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Just replace with gold diggers?

Entirely different. Groupies aren't aiming to leave the encounter with anything material. They're after you. They desire you. A gold digger is financially motivated. They desire the money. If they could cut you out of the equation and just get the money they would. You're on the opposite side of the desired/desirer dynamic with gold diggers.

> They're after you. They desire you.

They don't know you, so they're actually after some imaginary you that's perfect for them. Combining desirable known properties of you with a truck load of imaginary properties that they think you have.

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#417

Post by anonu » Mon, Feb 10, 2020, 9:50 PM UTC

umvi wrote: post #356

anonu wrote: post #324

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Both of those methods are accessing the public markets. Private investment means investing in non publicly traded companies. Like venture capital... For example

That kind of investment requires having a large amount of capital to begin with.

There are many websites that cater to private investments. Usually you need to be an accredited investor. But you don't need huge amounts of capital.

https://angel.co/ for example.

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#418

Post by philwelch » Mon, Feb 10, 2020, 10:24 PM UTC

rchaud wrote: post #409

philwelch wrote: post #259

Earlier quoted context omitted.

In show business, stage/screen names are often used to fit the actor's desired image. This definitely fits in with the ethnicity thing--most Americans are not going to see someone as an "everyman" if his last name is too "ethnic". But this was once common even for people who already had Anglo names; Gary Cooper apparently didn't think "Frank James Cooper" projected the right image, and I don't think anybody would acc…

The only exception to this that I can think of is Arnold Schwarzenegger. I guess with the accent it wouldn't have mattered if he'd changed his name to Mark Johnson or something. Up until fairly recently, I had no idea Charlie Sheen's birth name was Ramon Estevez.

Martin Sheen, actually. Charlie Sheen is Carlos Estevez, and chose his screen name to match his dad. In contrast, Charlie's brother and Martin's other son, Emilio Estevez, deliberately goes by his real name.

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#419

Post by Mandatum » Tue, Feb 11, 2020, 12:44 AM UTC

nlh wrote: post #131

The stalker thing is real - and I didn’t realize how real until a buddy who’s a moderately-successful YouTuber (750k subs) got his very own. Thankfully it’s a relatively benign case, but man, it’s real. There’s a kid who, for the past ~10 years, calls him Every. Single. Day. Without fail. For 10 years (that’s 3600+ phone calls). He leaves a voicemail and just talks about his day - what video games he’s playing, etc.…

Reminds me of working on a CRM. Our integration was breaking because one record that was being sent over was 100x bigger than any other record we'd seen during testing.

Turns out some poor fellow had an issue with mental health, not sure the specifics - but every day like clockwork he'd fill in one of our 20 page forms, submit his identification and apply for something. We had records for this same fellow going back 20 years when he first attempted to get involved with our organisation. The team responsible for actioning those forms are familiar with him, and have manually built in steps to ignore his submissions from reporting and extraction..

Whilst debugging this issue I found notes from each new manager that came and went over the years who encountered this fellow. Each had different opinions on what should be done, thankfully humanity reigned and nobody wanting to seek legal measures won.

When debugging this, I noticed the submissions stopped 4 months prior. I looked him up online, lo-and-behold an obituary.

Re: Reasons not to become famous

#420

Post by austhrow743 » Tue, Feb 11, 2020, 1:42 AM UTC

Strom wrote: post #416

austhrow743 wrote: post #73

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Entirely different. Groupies aren't aiming to leave the encounter with anything material. They're after you. They desire you. A gold digger is financially motivated. They desire the money. If they could cut you out of the equation and just get the money they would. You're on the opposite side of the desired/desirer dynamic with gold diggers.

> They're after you. They desire you. They don't know you, so they're actually after some imaginary you that's perfect for them. Combining desirable known properties of you with a truck load of imaginary properties that they think you have.

If they believe me to be extremely high status and I'm extremely high status, then that's knowing that I'm extremely high status. They know me to the extent that it matters.

You're talking about personality. That's one aspect of who you are. Hell, I'm a bit of a shithead. Anyone who likes me for my personality is wrong. I'm certainly not going to get caught up on needing people to like me for it.