That’s awesome! I typically send handwritten cards or letters and include my email address under my name to make it easy for them to reply if they’d like. As the volume of email and other electronic communication has increased, traditional mail has become more of a treat to receive. I first thought it might creep people out that I found their address, but I’ve never gotten that reaction. In fact, I’ve gotten far more meaningful replies than I imagined. My impression is that many/most well-known people feel very alone and yearn for contact that feels more real than the constant electronic communications from fans and the flattery from those immediately around them.
Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
121–130 of 143 posts
Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
#122Last year I went to a talk by John Papa where he mentioned that a lot of people seem to think that it's inappropriate to approach speakers to have a chat or tell them that you enjoyed their talk; while in reality, most of them would welcome it. That's why the first thing I ended up doing right after the talk was to thank John Papa for the positive influence he's had on my development as a software engineer. Nowadays,…
Haha, thought you said Papa John and I was really confused for a bit
Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
#123Unfortunately my Ph.D. supervisor died before I was able to tell him how profoundly his views and criticisms impacted my intellectual life. He was one of those hypercritical people for whom "it's okay" meant more or less the highest praise, both for himself and others. This made him a number of enemies, I believe, and for me, as a Ph.D. student, that attitude could be kind of demotivating at times. However, in retros…
I think you’ve summed up the sentiment of the entire thread in two words: don't wait
I'm one of the ones who's been waiting, mostly because I want more to show for it when I do contact them. Being in the middle of a career switch kind of looks like "my life is stalled" until you pull it off, and I don't want the other person to feel obligated to encourage me.
Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
#124Contacting people who've had an influence on your life is the very thing of living! Here's something I did last year, which I'll be doing again in a few weeks. Back in high school, I had a really great math teacher. He really created excitement about the subject, and he always had extra time to teach extra stuff to us. Just a really cool guy who'd show us Monty Python videos sketches and then some interesting math pr…
I kind of emphatized with your story. My highschool math teacher was and is one of the most amazing people that I have ever met. He had a way of imposing respect without forcing it. He had a way of making you see mathematics in every day life. For example, when we begin studying logarithms, he told us that some of the shapes drawn on the curtains can be generated with composed logarithmic functions and he challenged us to come up with functions that have cool shapes :)) after that, he taught us about fractals, even if it wasn't actually in the curriculum.
He was also a good friend. I recall I could only talk with him when I had my first crush. He was always there with a mature and educated opinion. Without doubt, he is one of my role models.
Now, when I have the time, I sometimes go back to highschool and talk to him. He would let me join 12th grade class sometimes. :) One of those times, something got into me and from nowhere, I asked him whether I could address to the class. And so, I have told the students about how my ex-teacher's maths instilled a sense of rigorousness in my reasoning and how mathematics can improve your overall practical problem solving skills, which made me a better engineer today.
I could tell after that he was touched by my gesture.
I guess that what I'm trying to say is we don't arrive anywhere just with our strengths only. And we have to aknowledge that, not forget the help and pay it forward. Be human and say thank you!
Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
#125It's nice to see that I'm not the only one with that intention :) I have contacted just a few people (every two/three months) and sent them longer texts with specific examples of why something they did or said had a positive impact on me. The channel does not matter to me, it depends on what kind of contact possibilities I have to that person. It's usually a really long compliment, which I let one or two persons, who…
Different point of view: they might think that your message warrants a proper answer instead of a one-liner and they have not gotten around to write it yet.
Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
#126I have a related problem. My tween son and I have been listening to Jack Benny radio programs for approximately two years. They're funny and clean, and mostly not problematic. And they're guaranteed to knock my son out at night. The sad part is every single person associated with the show passed decades ago. We literally have no one to thank. So, thank you Jack, Mary, Dennis, Rochester, Phil, and Don. You too Kenny,…
I grew up listening to Jack Benny, and I was born in the 80s. KNX-1070 in Los Angeles used to play old time radio every single night, with Saturdays dedicated to comedy. It was great and really helped me to bond with my father. I would caution you against trying to shield your son against “problematic” content, if by that you mean stuff that isn’t up to the precise current standard of political correctness. For one t…
I don't do much screening. I'd just prefer to have him listen to Ernie Anderson playing Rochester than Amos and Andy.
Anderson was a black comedian getting top billing and a high salary. His character often gets the better of Jack Benny, and is always treated respectfully (as respectfully as any of the characters, anyway.)
Compare that to "Amos and Andy" where two white actors play blackface and are often the butt of the joke.
I know someday he'll be ready for Lenny Bruce and Richard Pryor, but frankly, I'm just trying to get a boy to bed... ;-D
Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
#127Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
#128Earlier quoted context omitted.
I grew up listening to Jack Benny, and I was born in the 80s. KNX-1070 in Los Angeles used to play old time radio every single night, with Saturdays dedicated to comedy. It was great and really helped me to bond with my father. I would caution you against trying to shield your son against “problematic” content, if by that you mean stuff that isn’t up to the precise current standard of political correctness. For one t…
I don't do much screening. I'd just prefer to have him listen to Ernie Anderson playing Rochester than Amos and Andy. Anderson was a black comedian getting top billing and a high salary. His character often gets the better of Jack Benny, and is always treated respectfully (as respectfully as any of the characters, anyway.) Compare that to "Amos and Andy" where two white actors play blackface and are often the butt of…
That makes sense. Rochester was always my favorite! I even named a beloved pet parrot after him when I was young.
Recently, I enjoyed seeing Ernie Anderson in the original Brewster’s Millions. There’s something very satisfying about seeing his face instead of only hearing his iconic voice.
Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
#129No. It would come off as weird or creepy just to email someone out of the blue. Also, email is impersonal and seems like you are trying to solicit something from them. If someone had a positive impact on you just tell them when you meet in person. If you are really intent on contacting them for whatever reason, then a personal letter might be better.
Interesting. The people who've contacted me (via email) to say positive things I've generally taken at face value about . Maybe I just don't feel people are being weird/creepy when they thank me for the effort I've put into things? Re: "email is impersonal". To me, it's not. But then... I use a lot of emoticons and similar, to help convey things better than "impersonally". :D
> The people who've contacted me (via email) to say positive things I've generally taken at face value about .
That's good to hear, but what else do you expect them to say? You put them on the spot and I suspect 99% of the people would be polite.
> Maybe I just don't feel people are being weird/creepy when they thank me for the effort I've put into things?
If you didn't think it was weird/creepy, why are you here trying to get validation? I suspect deep down you know it is a bit weird and that's why you are seeking validation here. Or this is just another of those manipulative social engineering ploys you see all over social media.
> Re: "email is impersonal". To me, it's not. But then... I use a lot of emoticons and similar, to help convey things better than "impersonally". :D
That would come off as even creepier unless you are contacting family/friends. And if you are contacting family/friends, why not tell them in person when you meet them? And if it is just business acquaintances who helped you out, emails full of emoticons would come off as silly and unprofessional. But then again, I'm one of those ancient former 90s kids.
I also love that with these types of self-validation posts, only validating comments we know deep down are not true are upvoted, but the reality based critical comments we know deep down are true get downvoted. But whatever the agenda was in regards to your post, I hope you got what you wanted out of it.
Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?
#130Earlier quoted context omitted.
Interesting. The people who've contacted me (via email) to say positive things I've generally taken at face value about . Maybe I just don't feel people are being weird/creepy when they thank me for the effort I've put into things? Re: "email is impersonal". To me, it's not. But then... I use a lot of emoticons and similar, to help convey things better than "impersonally". :D
> The people who've contacted me (via email) to say positive things I've generally taken at face value about . That's good to hear, but what else do you expect them to say? You put them on the spot and I suspect 99% of the people would be polite. > Maybe I just don't feel people are being weird/creepy when they thank me for the effort I've put into things? If you didn't think it was weird/creepy, why are you here try…
> That's good to hear, but what else do you expect them to say? You put them on the spot and I suspect 99% of the people would be polite.
Did you read too fast or something? I'm talking about people who's emailed me out of the blue.
> If you didn't think it was weird/creepy, why are you here trying to get validation?
Huh? What are you even talking about?
What "trying to get validation"?
I was saying that people who've emailed me don't come across as weird of creepy.
Not sure where you're getting the rest of your ... [I don't even know what to call that] from. It sounds like you're trying to put people down. It's weird.
> That would come off as even creepier unless you are contacting family/friends.
Heh Heh Heh. Well, that explains a few things. You don't seem to understand how to communicate via text, and seem to misinterpret things in bizarre ways, and/or put people down.
Good luck with that. ;)
> ... why not tell them in person when you meet them?
Meet who?
The vast majority of people I communicate with are not people I've ever met in person, not are likely to.
Distributed teams are a thing. ;)
Sounds like your life is lived very differently, and you just can't relate. No worries. ;)