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Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

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Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

#81

Post by robbiejs »

I do sometimes. I think of how rarely I receive compliments and how good I feel whenever I do receive them. I did the Digital Nomad thing for 2 years. After the (exhausting) experience I emailed the employer, thanking him for all the experiences they made possible by allowing me to work remotely: surfing, exploring waterfalls, meeting my then-girlfriend... included some pretty pics as well.

They loved to hear it. That's also why I do it. This job meant more to me than just employment.

Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

#82

Post by mattbee »

Since deleting my Twitter, I'm much more motivated to email people out of the blue. It always feels positive, even if I don't get a reply.

I had a couple of lovely messages myself after selling my company in 2018 and they did a lot to help me square my impression of myself as committing career suicide / being a dreadful sellout etc. etc.

Do it!

Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

#83

Post by mguerville »

New year is a good excuse to reach out, I sent a few dozen emails or LinkedIn messages to people I worked with and enjoyed, and to part mentors. I think every one of them responded. It feels good to say hello and some good wishes without any ask afterwards

Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

#84

Post by vectorEQ »

such a weirdo. normal people don't contact people who they like :D ...

j/k ofcourse.

I think it's good what you do. A little positivity can go a long way. even though you might not expect it from someone who influenced you positively, but hearing such feedback might mean a lot to them personally and lift them up in their lives and day too, knowing they had some positive impact on someone. Imo too few people do this. good stuff and keep it up!

Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

#85

Post by etimberg »

JanisL wrote: post #30

I sometimes email open source authors to thank them for their efforts, I don't ask for anything, just an email to show gratification. I'm more inclined to go to this effort for the projects that are highly useful but not popular since as an author of such a project it is possible to have doubts if benefits from it when you go a long time with no outside feedback at all. The few times people have contacted us with pro…

As someone who's received these emails before, they make my day. It's always nice to hear that my work has helped someone.

Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

#86

Post by giarc »

In graduate school statistics class, we read a lot of the famous Bland/Altman Statistics Notes from the British Medical Journal (1). They are short, well written articles on topics in statistics. They helped me tremendously however during one review our class debated something back and forth. The authors email addresses are right in the article so I simply emailed the author and asked for clarification and indicated how useful the notes were in our class. He (I can't remember which author I contacted) was thankful for the feedback and resolved our issue.

1. https://www-users.york.ac.uk/~mb55/pubs/pbstnote.htm

Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

#87

Post by officemonkey »

I have a related problem.

My tween son and I have been listening to Jack Benny radio programs for approximately two years. They're funny and clean, and mostly not problematic. And they're guaranteed to knock my son out at night.

The sad part is every single person associated with the show passed decades ago. We literally have no one to thank.

So, thank you Jack, Mary, Dennis, Rochester, Phil, and Don. You too Kenny, even though you kinda sucked.

Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

#88

Post by jacquesm »

skrebbel wrote: post #78
jacquesm wrote: post #20

Yes I do. I've made it a point to review periodically and to personally thank the people that have had a positive impact on my life rather than to wait until I'm at their funeral or I find out they've passed on. I've also credited them in some of my writings: https://jacquesmattheij.com/your-own-company-you-can-do-it/ Realizing that you need other people to get ahead and that some people will take a chance on you whe…

Mad HN nitpick: > – dedicated to Piet Tacx, Fred Fluitsma and Eddy de Leeuw, thank you both very much for my early career and everything that followed from it. it says "both" but you're thanking three people :-)

good catch, will fix when back in NL (on the road right now)

Re: Ask HN: Do you ever contact people who have had a positive impact on you?

#90

Post by santa_boy »

Yes. Despite being quite an introvert, I have tried to reach out with genuine need, praise, requests to various people.

To be transparent, my fake attempts clearly displayed lack of approachability and interest. They just don't make sense any longer to me. I have a strong bias towards quality and risk over quantity and spray gun approaches.

There are three things that stand out from my analysis to make this effective:

- Genuinely appreciate your need to reach out. You cannot fake stuff for long

- Articulate your reasons and your homework as well as you can. This can mean a bit of hardwork but it is worth every bit

- Express gratitude and understanding even if the answer is negative. People have other things to do

On point 3, that is not a dead-end, pick up if you have a stronger case and try again without being painful

Also, get out of your comfort zone. The odds are in your favor IMHO. And yeah, don't get personal ... it does no good.

I'm still actively learning ... so this is quite experiential as we speak

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