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As a coach to similar-level people and professor/coach to elite students at NYU and Columbia Business School, I'm also impressed by how much the social and emotional challenges can be overcome with a few exercises that teach social and emotional skills. It amazes me that our educational system at every level teaches so much information, knowledge, and analytical skill but virtually ignores teaching social and emotion…
> “We’re all just big, complicated bags of emotion walking around.” This has been the most important discovery from my startup journey, and the topic on which I now place the greatest focus. I was in the YC batch of winter 2009 – the one that included Airbnb. It was a small batch, so we all got to know each other pretty well. There was something that really made the Airbnb founders stand out from the rest in that bat…
Thanks for sharing Tom. I enjoyed your recent LI post about some of the recent successes you’ve helped create in multiple businesses - it really seemed (with all the social media caveats) that you’ve been focused and continue to create enormous value around you.
Funny for you to observe that I've seemed “focused”.
I've often though that to an outsider who isn't right beside me on this journey, I'd seem incredibly unfocused; since leaving my startup I've worked on almost 10 different projects or contracts.
But what I've actually been doing, mostly very privately, is undertaking a highly focused project/experiment in deeply healing my mind and body, whilst doing what I need to do to make a living along the way, and doing what I can to keep the ball moving forward towards some fuzzy long-term career outcome and/or life purpose.
And yep, it does all seem to be yielding some solid results, but if it looks like I've been focused, well I think that's a happy accident :)
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Wow. Thanks for that. When Airbnb popped up on my screen I was in Siberia having my website rewritten from scratch after 8 years of spaghetti code. It was the same thing and Airbnb which was just designed better (in 2008). When a couple of years later I finally realized they destroyed my business it took me some time to admit I didn't really miss a chance: I had none to begin with. I just don't have what it takes to…
Thanks for sharing this, if you don’t mind to elaborate, what aspects of personality do you think have more weight? Have you consider partnering with someone who complements those aspects?
A company needs a visionary, someone who is at times even blinded by their optimism and vision. You pair that visionary with a strong grounded realist, and they balance each other out. There are times when both are needed - to either take a leap of faith (risk) or mitigate/avoid risks.
But this dynamic will also only work if these founders have good communication and respect towards each other, otherwise friction can turn into bitterness and resentment.
> “We’re all just big, complicated bags of emotion walking around.” This has been the most important discovery from my startup journey, and the topic on which I now place the greatest focus. I was in the YC batch of winter 2009 – the one that included Airbnb. It was a small batch, so we all got to know each other pretty well. There was something that really made the Airbnb founders stand out from the rest in that bat…
Wow. Thanks for that. When Airbnb popped up on my screen I was in Siberia having my website rewritten from scratch after 8 years of spaghetti code. It was the same thing and Airbnb which was just designed better (in 2008). When a couple of years later I finally realized they destroyed my business it took me some time to admit I didn't really miss a chance: I had none to begin with. I just don't have what it takes to…
Don't be too hard on yourself, not everyone has the necessary work ethic to succeed in this industry. The AirBnB guys are very smart and they have excellent business acumen. They had a vision and they created opportunities for themselves through hard work. Not everyone can be a winner.
As a coach to similar-level people and professor/coach to elite students at NYU and Columbia Business School, I'm also impressed by how much the social and emotional challenges can be overcome with a few exercises that teach social and emotional skills. It amazes me that our educational system at every level teaches so much information, knowledge, and analytical skill but virtually ignores teaching social and emotion…
And what are those few exercises?
As a coach to similar-level people and professor/coach to elite students at NYU and Columbia Business School, I'm also impressed by how much the social and emotional challenges can be overcome with a few exercises that teach social and emotional skills. It amazes me that our educational system at every level teaches so much information, knowledge, and analytical skill but virtually ignores teaching social and emotion…
And what are those few exercises?
I wrote a couple up in my blog with examples and video to illustrate. Since the original post mentioned inner monologue, copying just the action from http://joshuaspodek.com/effective-self-awareness-exercise
1. Carry a notebook or a few sheets of paper for a week or two
2. A few times each day write your exact thoughts — not the general
3. Note the following
- What prompts each instance
- What emotions relate to it
- How the instances relate to each other, what categories they fit in
Each time you write will probably take a few minutes. The whole exercise will take about an hour over a week or two.
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Another example is how to make a meaningful connection: http://joshuaspodek.com/meaningful-connection
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Each exercise is valuable on its own, but their greatest value comes in building to others, as scales lead to playing musical pieces and ground strokes lead to playing tennis. Practice and rehearsal in any active, social, experiential, emotional, performance-based field leads to self-awareness, self-expression, mastery, and freedom.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
And what are those few exercises?
I haven't found writing them in internet forum conveys them effectively. It's like telling people how to play a scale or hit tennis ground strokes. You generally need some demonstration and practice, which most people forego. I wrote a couple up in my blog with examples and video to illustrate. Since the original post mentioned inner monologue, copying just the action from http://joshuaspodek.com/effective-self-aware…
"Learning to manage your focus, not your time" I'm a follower of this priority aswell. I can't tame the onslaught, but I can ensure that my focus is spent in the right places. I'd love to hear more about this topic as I often have issues communicating what I mean by that, as many other people in my environment want to see get things done "one after the other".
Lately I listened to some talks of Jordan Peterson. There is a lot to say about his work but there is always a recurring theme: take time to think things through. And I believe in this time of constant distraction it is very hard to do this. But when you do you order your thoughts and it becomes much easier to communicate your thoughts.