I understand what you're saying, but it doesn't change that seeing additional fees after an initial decision seriously puts me off. Note that I'm from Europe, i.e. if the sticker on the shelf says something is 5.99, it's 5.99, not 6.47.
I also often do feel cheated because the shipping fees often match or exceed non-discounted consumer postage fees, and many stores just use it to advertise deceptively low prices. The argument here is "handling cost", but a grocery store also has handling costs - and how would you feel if a "check-out fee" was added at the end?
When I'm on a shopping site to buy an individual item, I want to know "how much do I have to pay to have this item in my hand". I don't care if you charge $5 for the item and $10 for shipping, or $15 with free shipping.
If the shipping fee is clearly advertised (i.e. in legible, discoverable font right next to the price) and is reasonable, it's one thing. But patterns I often see and always hate:
- ridiculous shipping fees used to advertise lower prices than others when the actual price is higher (sucks if the platform you're using sorts by price, not total cost - like Amazon does!)
- charging 9.99 for shipping for something that comes in a barely padded envelope with 1.50 worth of postage on it
- shipping costs well hidden, so you have to spend time before you know what the actual price you'll pay is
I consider "free shipping" not "manipulating me into thinking that shipping doesn't have cost". I consider it a promise that what I see is what I pay (i.e. I consider that transparency). Without it, if you see $19.99 on a web site, it could mean $19.99, or $39.98, and you often can't easily tell.