Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says • Hacker News Board

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#311

Post by megous » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:52 AM UTC

notyourday wrote: post #280

skocznymroczny wrote: post #235

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The only major remaining website that tries to match people based on interests is OKCupid. And even it is changing every few months. Unfortunately, the success of Tinder and move to mobile phones first ruined most of the dating websites, which try to emulate its success. Because people mostly use phone nowadays for dating websites, long profiles are mostly gone, sending long letters is gone, many conversations are si…

> The only major remaining website that tries to match people based on interests is OKCupid. And even it is changing every few months. Unfortunately, the success of Tinder and move to mobile phones first ruined most of the dating websites, which try to emulate its success. Because people mostly use phone nowadays for dating websites, long profiles are mostly gone, sending long letters is gone, many conversations are…

Yeah, no. Noone needed to read some long ranty message to the end, on the "long form" dating websites of the past. And I doubt there were even that many long form messages from men, given how many women complained in their profiles that they don't respond to "Hi! How're you?" and demanded men to put more effort in.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#312

Post by meigwilym » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:52 AM UTC

srbby wrote: post #302

burneraccount12 wrote: post #295

Dating threads on HN honestly could be confused for incel message boards on Reddit. Some real quotes from this thread: 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." 2. "I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness" 3. "Bumble's rule is that Men are not…

>If you want to improve your dating prospects, get in shape. Anyone can get in shape, doesn't matter how rich or successful or handsome your face is. That's exactly the problem: men have to get in shape to get women who are way below their looks. And that's all. Men see this as unjust. Whether this is unjust or not is a matter of opinion which you may or may not agree on, but it's an opinion nonetheless. Also with 5…

This really isn't true. Being pleasant and friendly and funny is attractive to many women. Being attractive is a nice shortcut to a relationship, but it won't keep you in one. That's where personality comes in.

Besides, there are plenty of women who aren't interested in body builder type physiques, just as there are plenty of men who aren't interested in size six models.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#313

Post by stoksc » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:55 AM UTC

MichaelApproved wrote: post #304

burneraccount12 wrote: post #295

Dating threads on HN honestly could be confused for incel message boards on Reddit. Some real quotes from this thread: 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." 2. "I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness" 3. "Bumble's rule is that Men are not…

> 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." How is this an incel statement? > 5. "All dating apps are filled with fakes and scams mostly perpetrated by those who own the app to milk you of your money. We just saw that this isn't such a crazy concept. Interested in hearing what I might've misunderstood.

5 definitely isn’t, it’s not a gender specific comment and backed up by the post lol.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#314

Post by Jonathanks » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:55 AM UTC

tictok4 wrote: post #300

burneraccount12 wrote: post #295

Dating threads on HN honestly could be confused for incel message boards on Reddit. Some real quotes from this thread: 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." 2. "I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness" 3. "Bumble's rule is that Men are not…

>If you want to improve your dating prospects, get in shape. Anyone can get in shape, doesn't matter how rich or successful or handsome your face is. >Second, improve your social skills / join something. Yes to both of these. Dating or not these are vital in life.

"Dating or not, these are vital in life."

I don't mean to be pedantic, but, without the comma, I read it wrong twice. I agree with you totally. I'm currently looking for a course I can volunteer for outside my day job.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#315

Post by willmacdonald » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:55 AM UTC

srbby wrote: post #302

burneraccount12 wrote: post #295

Dating threads on HN honestly could be confused for incel message boards on Reddit. Some real quotes from this thread: 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." 2. "I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness" 3. "Bumble's rule is that Men are not…

>If you want to improve your dating prospects, get in shape. Anyone can get in shape, doesn't matter how rich or successful or handsome your face is. That's exactly the problem: men have to get in shape to get women who are way below their looks. And that's all. Men see this as unjust. Whether this is unjust or not is a matter of opinion which you may or may not agree on, but it's an opinion nonetheless. Also with 5…

and women don't have to get in shape/loose weight/worry about looks????

Woman have a far tougher time on Tinder style apps. Men are much more visual when choosing, and women have to stand out so much more than men.

Getting in shape is just looking after your body and health, you should do that for yourself. Don't think you have to be a 'gym bro'. I have yet to meet a woman who is actually attracted by guys who present a 6-pack and huge muscles.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#316

Post by lotsofpulp » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:55 AM UTC

_jal wrote: post #83

ravenstine wrote: post #73

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I see you're getting downvoted, which is funny because I've proposed the same idea on HN a few times and a lot of people thought it was a good idea. Maybe the weight thing isn't necessary with everything else in play, but otherwise I think this is something that should be tried. Yet nobody has bitten. Perhaps that means it's either not viable or of interest to investors.

Perhaps the concept of outsourcing the vetting of potential mates' physical characteristics strikes folks as disturbing.

I think what is disturbing is people’s propensity to lie about something so objectively false.

As far as I know, vetting potential mates’ physical characteristics has happened for thousands of years, whenever families/friends/coworkers propose a match.

I might even think this is a superior system as people are bad at perceiving their own price in the mating market, and an outside appraisal is frequently more accurate.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#317

Post by notyourday » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:56 AM UTC

srbby wrote: post #302

burneraccount12 wrote: post #295

Dating threads on HN honestly could be confused for incel message boards on Reddit. Some real quotes from this thread: 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." 2. "I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness" 3. "Bumble's rule is that Men are not…

>If you want to improve your dating prospects, get in shape. Anyone can get in shape, doesn't matter how rich or successful or handsome your face is. That's exactly the problem: men have to get in shape to get women who are way below their looks. And that's all. Men see this as unjust. Whether this is unjust or not is a matter of opinion which you may or may not agree on, but it's an opinion nonetheless. Also with 5…

> That's exactly the problem: men have to get in shape to get women who are way below their looks.

A car is not worth what the seller wants to get for it. It is worth whatever the buyer gives and seller accepts.

One may think he is astonishingly beautiful but if there's no taker for his beauty, he is ought to ask himself if he is over-valuing some criteria. It is possible that his potential partners are wrong, of course, in which case the question is what does he value more -- being "correct and spending time on Pornhub" or being "incorrect and waking up next to Jackie".

> And that's all. Men see this as unjust. Whether this is unjust or not is a matter of opinion which you may or may not agree on, but it's an opinion nonetheless.

Opinions in a vacuum are just that, opinions in a vacuum.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#318

Post by forgotmypw » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:56 AM UTC

fetbaffe wrote: post #310

burneraccount12 wrote: post #295

Dating threads on HN honestly could be confused for incel message boards on Reddit. Some real quotes from this thread: 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." 2. "I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness" 3. "Bumble's rule is that Men are not…

You don’t seem understand at all. Biologically males are supposed to make contact with females, that is how every species works, but we as humans has now created an environment where that is either frowned upon or ridiculed.

"Biologically" speaking, males are the pursuers, and women are the gatekeepers.

I think what many men don't seem to understand is that our society creates an environment where women, especially attractive ones, but almost every women, really, are approached constantly, many times a day if you live in a city.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#319

Post by eckza » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:57 AM UTC

fetbaffe wrote: post #310

burneraccount12 wrote: post #295

Dating threads on HN honestly could be confused for incel message boards on Reddit. Some real quotes from this thread: 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." 2. "I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness" 3. "Bumble's rule is that Men are not…

You don’t seem understand at all. Biologically males are supposed to make contact with females, that is how every species works, but we as humans has now created an environment where that is either frowned upon or ridiculed.

No, it’s because you all act like fucking creeps 90% of the time, whether you realize it or not.

Downvote away.

Re: Match.com Used Fake Ads to Swindle Users, F.T.C. Says

#320

Post by dx87 » Thu, Sep 26, 2019, 11:58 AM UTC

burneraccount12 wrote: post #295

Dating threads on HN honestly could be confused for incel message boards on Reddit. Some real quotes from this thread: 1. "As a male, it becomes very difficult to stand out if you are actually interested in someone." 2. "I know a few women that use Tinder: they are alone, late thirties and never got anything serious out of Tinder, but they use it to reassure their attractiveness" 3. "Bumble's rule is that Men are not…

OkCupid did a study on online dating, and men really do get the short end of the stick. They found that when a group of women have their attractivness rated by men, the results fit a bell curve where most women are considered average, and few are very attractive or unattractive. When they asked women to rate men, the results fit a negative exponential model. The majority of men were considered very unattractive, fewer were average looking, and even less were very attractive.

People don't always go for the most physically attractive partner, and traits that are seen as desirable in men are difficult, if not impossible, to convey through an online dating site. So some of what you consider "incel" opinions are factually correct, and backed up by the creators of a dating site.