Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

nytimes.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

31–40 of 271 posts

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#31

Post by ellard »

snarf21 wrote: post #22
vincent-toups wrote: post #4

Everyone should go to therapy. I don't think I've ever met a person who doesn't need to talk things out, from time to time, with a semi-objective, third party. Most of us were raised by imperfect people trying their best who still made a lot of mistakes. Even people who had really prepared parents probably experienced things which might have left us with some unresolved issues. Go see a therapist. Its not a big deal.

Agreed, it is still largely a question of optics and prejudice. People associate therapy with psychiatry and that anyone going is "crazy". I've long argued that we should come up with a better term. I prefer stress counselor instead of therapist. It allows more natural discussion with others too. "I see a stress counselor and we just talk about how to be less stressed at work and home" is a very easy and non-clinical…

I disagree with coining a different term to make it more socially acceptable. Therapist being generic is useful for keeping mental health issues under a single blanket and preventing other people from easily figuring out what you're going there for. This is similar to how going to a doctor could range from doing your yearly check up to following up on a possibly fatal issue.

The real solution is the one we've already been pushing for and have had a great amount of success over the years, which is to treat mental health issues with the same importance as physical health issues.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#32

Post by skizm »

erokar wrote: post #26

If your job is making you unhappy, therapy will just be a band-aid. The solution is to quit and find something better to do.

Where can I find someone that will pay me a living wage to read fantasy novels, go to the gym, play video games, and occasionally travel?

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#33

Post by CalRobert »

Every minute spent not fighting climate apocalypse is a fucking waste of time. And I waste most of my time, because I can't find a way to fight while staying solvent (this month I'm buying a roof to fix the leaky one, for instance).

In another thread the clathrate gun is about to go off big time https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=21026051

Anxiety is pretty warranted when you're literally looking at the end of civilization, and possibly an early, horrible death for you, or infinitely more sadly, your kid.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#35

Post by vincent-toups »

83457 wrote: post #16
vincent-toups wrote: post #4

Everyone should go to therapy. I don't think I've ever met a person who doesn't need to talk things out, from time to time, with a semi-objective, third party. Most of us were raised by imperfect people trying their best who still made a lot of mistakes. Even people who had really prepared parents probably experienced things which might have left us with some unresolved issues. Go see a therapist. Its not a big deal.

Wouldn't that potentially present problems similar to everyone getting unnecessary medical tests done and following up on false positives causing more problems than they are worth? If your life is going well then a certain percentage of people going to a therapist could actually make things worse, not to mention that if everyone went then quality of therapists would probably go down. Just a thought.

Most therapy does not lead to medical tests or procedures or anything like that. Especially if you're more or less ok. Its just some dedicated time to talk about how your feelings relate to stuff happening in your life and previous experiences.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#36

Post by 0xbadcafebee »

erokar wrote: post #26

If your job is making you unhappy, therapy will just be a band-aid. The solution is to quit and find something better to do.

Or, go to therapy, develop a better understanding of what makes you happy and why you took that job to begin with, figure out if a change of job would make you happy at all, develop a richer inner/outer life to better find meaning and happiness, use this new found insight to improve the workplace, and then quit and find something better.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#37

Post by skizm »

Anxious tech workers can afford therapy. A lot of the rest of the working world is just as, if not more, anxious. Our entire lives, sans 4 weeks or so a year, are dedicated to doing stuff we don't really care about, but there is no alternative.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#38

Post by vincent-toups »

whatshisface wrote: post #11
vincent-toups wrote: post #4

Everyone should go to therapy. I don't think I've ever met a person who doesn't need to talk things out, from time to time, with a semi-objective, third party. Most of us were raised by imperfect people trying their best who still made a lot of mistakes. Even people who had really prepared parents probably experienced things which might have left us with some unresolved issues. Go see a therapist. Its not a big deal.

Can't people without medical grade issues talk to their wife/husband?

Obviously people do. But it can be enormously good for a relationship to have an external, non-personal, context for that kind of work.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#39

Post by whalesalad »

I deleted all my tweets. Killed the app. Killed the Reddit app. Killed Instagram. Killed Facebook. I need to reactivate FB and do a dump of my data, but I’m dreading that. I just want the photos.

I’m finding solace in boredom and using that as a catalyst for change. I’ve been reading more, already finished three books in the last few weeks. I’m on a mission to pour rocket fuel on my personal consulting business.

I’m also seeing a psych and a psychotherapist. It’s helping, albeit slowly.

Eliminate cognitive load. Eliminate distractions. Eliminate things from your life that don’t bring you joy and happiness. Do it. Rip it off like a bandaid. Every little minuscule things counts and adds up to the “death by a thousand cuts” anxiety ridden life we are all enduring.

Ignite a fire in the forest that is your life and let all the shit burn to the ground. The big strong redwoods will remain. Don’t be afraid to seek help from professionals.

We are only on this earth for one life. I only get to watch the Super Bowl maybe 30 more times. I only get to own so many more vehicles. I only get to spend time with my dogs for so long.

It’s not just tech workers. Everyone is struggling. Be good to yourself.

Re: Anxious tech workers are going to therapy

#40

Post by Gh0stRAT »

skizm wrote: post #32
erokar wrote: post #26

If your job is making you unhappy, therapy will just be a band-aid. The solution is to quit and find something better to do.

Where can I find someone that will pay me a living wage to read fantasy novels, go to the gym, play video games, and occasionally travel?

Sounds like some kind of Witness Protection program.
Post reply on HN