Earlier quoted context omitted.
I just recently switched to using vscode with the remote ssh plugin and setup an ubuntu vm on my windows machine and performance is like 100x better. Docker for mac is basically dead to me now, going to finish migrating my projects over to the VM and uninstall it from my laptop.
Have you tried running the Vscode + Linux Subsystem + Docker on Windows stack? It's been pretty good so far (a good writeup on this is at https://nickjanetakis.com/blog/setting-up-docker-for-windows... )
Yeah I don't know why but on Windows the volume performance generally seems to be a lot better than Mac.
I have nothing but good things to say even on 5 year old hardware. Massive web apps (including using webpack) are very very speedy with volumes with a number of different stacks (flask, rails, phoenix, webpack, node).
I still use that set up years later and it's really solid.