I read things like that with totally different eyes than when I had no kids.
I could read things like that when I had no kids.
It's later than you think
11–20 of 147 posts
Re: It's later than you think
#12Wasn't planning on wiping away tears from my eyes this evening...
Re: It's later than you think
#13Re: It's later than you think
#14i'm not crying you're crying
Re: It's later than you think
#15Very touching, I shed a few tears on this part.
"I’m guessing you have 1:1 meetings on the books with a lot of people you work with. Do you have them regularly scheduled with your kids?"
I am totally doing this, but more like 1:1 days.
Re: It's later than you think
#16Wow. That’s a jolt of sobriety. God bless this man and his family.
Re: It's later than you think
#17I read things like that with totally different eyes than when I had no kids.
My kid recently turned one. I can't read this article without weeping. Everyday when I back home, I regret not spending more time with my family. I love coding, by all means. But this article is a huge wake up call on where I want to strike the balance.
Thanks for the article
Re: It's later than you think
#18I think we need to care about our parent too. As they become old, we are just fly away from them and they will struggle in their stage as us. Damn life.
So much this. Personally feel this is one of the most deplorable "widely accepted" social phenomenon in the west.
I have an immigrant family on my street (know them and they are from China) that is three generations...every morning as I drive to work I pass the grandparents walking the children to the bus stop for school. Every day I think "why don't our parents live with us"? I've asked them but they've said no. They have their own home and lives and like their independence. Maybe that's true, but I wonder if they're actually lonely and don't want to impose. At the end of the day I just have to think this is a mutually non-beneficial setup for all involved (the US style of moving out "never to return" at 18).
I don't pretend to know why or say how to "fix" it but I believe we in the U.S. (and assuming at least some of the "west") took a wrong path somewhere when it comes to this.
Also constantly see in the media examples of college grads living and working from home, always in a "negative" economic-driven context. Maybe this is a trend that is changing (again in my opinion for the better).
I didn't even bring up nursing homes.
Edit: Constant ""'s are because I'm trying to be aware of over-generalize here...mainly speaking for "mainstream U.S. culture" which is always problematically reductive
Re: It's later than you think
#19I think we need to care about our parent too. As they become old, we are just fly away from them and they will struggle in their stage as us. Damn life.
So much this. Personally feel this is one of the most deplorable "widely accepted" social phenomenon in the west. I have an immigrant family on my street (know them and they are from China) that is three generations...every morning as I drive to work I pass the grandparents walking the children to the bus stop for school. Every day I think "why don't our parents live with us"? I've asked them but they've said no. The…
It's a devil's bargain either way. If you can't move away from your parents, your career prospects & upward mobility can be severely hampered. If your parents move to follow you, they can cut short their own successful careers and sever deep social ties they have spent a lifetime building.
Most of this country was settled & built by people who left home to find their fortune.
Re: It's later than you think
#20Very touching, I shed a few tears on this part. "I’m guessing you have 1:1 meetings on the books with a lot of people you work with. Do you have them regularly scheduled with your kids?" I am totally doing this, but more like 1:1 days.
Definitely, make sure there's just "time". Everyone I've spoken to who has a real quality relationship with their kids has reiterated quantity is better than "quality".
Don't fall into the trap of thinking that making it to the odd piano recital is the same as being there every day for dinner.
As the piece sadly reminds us, that calendar invite might be scheduled too late.