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How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

parenting.nytimes.com

31–40 of 285 posts

Re: How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

#31

0. Earplugs 1. Division-of-labor, specialization of trade... although it might not fit every feminists' "equality of outcome, share everything" political-correctness, it doesn't make combined net income much sense (or cents) to risk a $300k income with sleeplessness/low-productivity vs. an $80k one if one spouse (assuming spouse isn't a lawyer, doctor or engineer) can be at home full-time, or both as full-time parent…

This is the type of sexist, ignorant bullshit I'd expect to see on reddit.

Welcome to hn

Re: How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

#32

0. Earplugs 1. Division-of-labor, specialization of trade... although it might not fit every feminists' "equality of outcome, share everything" political-correctness, it doesn't make combined net income much sense (or cents) to risk a $300k income with sleeplessness/low-productivity vs. an $80k one if one spouse (assuming spouse isn't a lawyer, doctor or engineer) can be at home full-time, or both as full-time parent…

I'm sure you'd make a great parent.

> Dumping/delegating mundane tasks onto a high income earner doesn't jive with common sense

From the article: "Caring for your child, therefore, produces not only a strong bond but a neurochemical reward, inducing feelings of happiness, contentment and warmth"

I suspect that some of the "mundane tasks" you have in mind are exactly the ones that produce this bond - like changing a diaper when you hear your baby crying at night. That's probably difficult if you're using earplugs, and I guess such tasks might not make sense for some high income earners, though.

Re: How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

#33

0. Earplugs 1. Division-of-labor, specialization of trade... although it might not fit every feminists' "equality of outcome, share everything" political-correctness, it doesn't make combined net income much sense (or cents) to risk a $300k income with sleeplessness/low-productivity vs. an $80k one if one spouse (assuming spouse isn't a lawyer, doctor or engineer) can be at home full-time, or both as full-time parent…

Re: 1 - would you stand to the same words if the 300k income would be the woman‘s?

[deleted]

Re: How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

#34
post #20

I was hoping this would explain my weight gain but I suppose I have to accept that replacing daily workouts with 3 bowls of ice cream and magic shell may be the culprit.

Lack of sleep, eating what u can when u can, no time to spend on yourself/physical activities

I gained 40 pounds through my wife's pregnancy and post.

I am just starting to shed some weight now

- 5 months old baby

Re: How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

#36

Has there been any studies on adopting a baby? Does it yield the same results on men? If yes, then it might as well be a matter of social construct, where a new vulnerable addition to the group needs protection for example. Another curious question, it would be interesting to see the impact of adopting a cat or a dog on men’s testosterone levels.

> Another curious question, it would be interesting to see the impact of adopting a cat or a dog on men’s testosterone levels.

Very interesting idea though. But all of this fathering thing is related with continue one's bloodline I guess. Humans are very motivated to maintain their lineage. Adopting pets may be related with another topic.

Re: How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

#37
post #35

"University in Israel suggested that the parts of the brain that light up the most are startlingly different for each parent." Startlingly? Almost like every person was different..

'each' here is bound to a specific instance of a pair of parents - i.e. "... are startling different for the mother and the father"

English is not a good language

Re: How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

#38

Random Q: I have to lose 40 lbs getting dad-bod sans dadness right now (medication side-effects). 0. Has anyone seriously looked into variations of intermittent fasting &| extended fasting? 1. Did you have brain fog after hunger went away after a few days, or less fog? 2. What about maintenance vitamins, electrolytes and preventing gallstones? 3. How long did you continue for, until hunger returned?

Most reliable method in my own experience: simply eat less.

Eat your normal amount of meals, shovel it in your mouth, but stop before finishing the whole portion. I eat maybe 75% of each meals and toss the remaining bits. Do it for a couple months and watch the weight magically shed off.

It works because it requires no change in meal-type habits; it’s simply fewer calories. End of the day, that’s always the goal and this way is the most direct and simple

When the meals come where it’s hard to stop at 75%, I force myself to toss my napkin and utensils on the plate ensuring the food is now “dirty”. So altogether, it’s very few behavior changes make for a foolproof method.

Re: How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

#39
https://nobaproject.com/modules/hormones-behavior here it says that a change in hormone levels can trigger a change in behaviour, but on the other hand it can be the result of changed behaviour. For me as a laymen it is not clear how to read all this.

Re: How Men’s Bodies Change When They Become Fathers

#40
post #2

"Certain areas within parts of the brain linked to attachment, nurturing, empathy and the ability to interpret and react appropriately to a baby’s behavior had more gray and white matter between 12 and 16 weeks than they did between two and four weeks." For you father-programmers out there: did you notice any changes in your programming/work abilities around the 12-16 week mark?

I took three months off each time. I suspect I'd have been very sub-par in a work context as like others have mentioned, the overriding change was lack of sleep. We definitely felt zombie-like for some good proportion of that time. Perhaps the extra brain matter was trying to compensate for running on empty? :)

We organised with me as evening shift - so mum could get a little uninterrupted sleep, and she picked up the morning shift.

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