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Overcome Fear in 2011. Get Rejected On Purpose

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Re: Overcome Fear in 2011. Get Rejected On Purpose

#11

Post by nazgulnarsil »

dustingetz wrote: post #9
rorrr wrote: post #4

One great way of doing this is to interview for jobs that you think you're not qualified enough for. I've gone to so many interviews over the years, that after a while it doesn't matter if some company X doesn't take you. You just stop worrying. I have a couple of friends who never go to interviews, unless their skills match the job description almost perfectly. They rob themselves of chances to get more money, more…

the value of interviewing for a job i'm underqualified for, even including rejection practice and promotion potential, probably isn't worth the time and effort.

I think you overestimate the time and effort involved.

a 1% chance to earn 20k more a year and learn new skills along the way is worth more than the $200/a few hours of my life a strict cost/benefit would indicate.

Re: Overcome Fear in 2011. Get Rejected On Purpose

#14

Post by evgeny0 »

dustingetz wrote: post #9
rorrr wrote: post #4

One great way of doing this is to interview for jobs that you think you're not qualified enough for. I've gone to so many interviews over the years, that after a while it doesn't matter if some company X doesn't take you. You just stop worrying. I have a couple of friends who never go to interviews, unless their skills match the job description almost perfectly. They rob themselves of chances to get more money, more…

the value of interviewing for a job i'm underqualified for, even including rejection practice and promotion potential, probably isn't worth the time and effort.

Agreed. You may also be ruling yourself out of consideration for future opportunities with the same company that you genuinely are qualified for, because you've created the perception that you're incompetent or just don't interview well. (Let's face it, it would be difficult to give good answers at the interview when you're clearly not qualified.)

Re: Overcome Fear in 2011. Get Rejected On Purpose

#15

Post by singular »

rorrr wrote: post #4

One great way of doing this is to interview for jobs that you think you're not qualified enough for. I've gone to so many interviews over the years, that after a while it doesn't matter if some company X doesn't take you. You just stop worrying. I have a couple of friends who never go to interviews, unless their skills match the job description almost perfectly. They rob themselves of chances to get more money, more…

You forget the impact interviewing has on you emotionally - if you fail x number of interviews, each accompanied by the typical deafening silence as to why, exactly, they don't want you, things start to grate pretty bad.

I think it's better to take a more balanced approach - interview until you have enough information to determine what it is you need to work on (even with their silence you can eventually work this out to some degree by examining what you were able to deal with well and not so much), then stop, go work on that, rinse and repeat until you're getting offers.

The whole concept of rejection therapy seems a rehash of the simple wisdom that you should have the balls to get out there and gather data, so to speak, on the things you desire rather than simply letting yourself rot in a less desirable situation out of fear.

However, I worry that people will lose sight of the fact that it's about actually challenging assumptions and treat it as some macho game. It's not smart to go out and get rejected, not think about why, then simply repeat the rejection over again.

Re: Overcome Fear in 2011. Get Rejected On Purpose

#17

Post by singular »

brandnewlow wrote: post #12
dustingetz wrote: post #8

or just go learn how to pick up girls. the skills are relevant to entrepreneurs.

Dating hack of the year: http://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/ekd1o/iam_my_own_okcup...

Two interesting things about that thread - 1. he's gathering real data on women not just theorising, which is smart, 2. something you can't control - looks (fundamentally, obviously if you're very overweight [like me] you can fix that, same with the way you dress etc.) - has the biggest impact of all.

Moral of the story - real data trumps everything, even if that data makes you realise you aren't entirely in control of the situation :)

Re: Overcome Fear in 2011. Get Rejected On Purpose

#18

Post by digitallogic »

dustingetz wrote: post #9
rorrr wrote: post #4

One great way of doing this is to interview for jobs that you think you're not qualified enough for. I've gone to so many interviews over the years, that after a while it doesn't matter if some company X doesn't take you. You just stop worrying. I have a couple of friends who never go to interviews, unless their skills match the job description almost perfectly. They rob themselves of chances to get more money, more…

the value of interviewing for a job i'm underqualified for, even including rejection practice and promotion potential, probably isn't worth the time and effort.

I think you may be right for jobs you _are_ underqualified for, but what about all the jobs you only _think_ you're underqualified for?

You really have no way of knowing if you're underqualified or not from the amount of information about any particular job you might come across (on a job board or a company's website). Now obviously they may list a bunch of technologies you've never worked for, but even then they might be willing to let a smart person learn.

Re: Overcome Fear in 2011. Get Rejected On Purpose

#19

Post by wwalker3 »

Having to reject someone can be a very stressful experience. I don't like the idea of purposefully inflicting that stress on others unless there's a chance we both could benefit.

"Getting rejected on purpose" sounds like I'd be picking situations where I know for sure I'll be rejected -- an inappropriate proposition, an undeserved request. I don't want to do that to someone else just to try to desensitize myself to rejection.

Re: Overcome Fear in 2011. Get Rejected On Purpose

#20

Post by jdminhbg »

randallsquared wrote: post #6
david_shaw wrote: post #2

Rejection therapy has gotten a lot of coverage on HN recently, and for good reason. A lot of people on the Internet use rejection therapy to get over their fears of asking the cute girl out for coffee or going to the trendy nightclub they've never entered before. Here at HN, however, I think rejection therapy is able to really shine: sitting down for lunch with some VC's or C-level executives takes courage, and pitch…

sitting down for lunch with some VC's or C-level executives takes courage, and pitching your idea is literally asking for it to get shot down. ...where by "literally" you mean "figuratively". Unless VCs you lunch with habitually bring firearms or the like to lunch. :)

That depends on whether you think "literally" is modifying "asking" or "shot."
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