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Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

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Re: Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

#201

Post by news_hacker »

fluroblue wrote: post #198
news_hacker wrote: post #145

- We need to apply the same principles of consumption that we do to food to information. Consume responsibly. Be aware of the sourcing. Don't binge. Know what's junk and what's nourishing. Give back to positive sources to nourish and grow them (sustainability). - Income inequality is huge. Slavery still exists but in a misdirected, slight-of-hand way. Work or the system will abandon you and it's "your fault". - Learn…

Any tips or resources on breaking out of the middle class mentality?

Seek out people who aren't bitter about the "elite", but students of them.

Some good reads, although they may at first make you a bit depressed: https://www.ribbonfarm.com/2009/10/07/the-gervais-principle-... and The Developer Hegemony.

Robert Kiyosaki, of Rich Dad Poor Dad fame, has some pretty solid fundamental advice - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ftBeTIDv8Vg

Re: Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

#202

Post by news_hacker »

methusala8 wrote: post #180
news_hacker wrote: post #145

- We need to apply the same principles of consumption that we do to food to information. Consume responsibly. Be aware of the sourcing. Don't binge. Know what's junk and what's nourishing. Give back to positive sources to nourish and grow them (sustainability). - Income inequality is huge. Slavery still exists but in a misdirected, slight-of-hand way. Work or the system will abandon you and it's "your fault". - Learn…

All valid points. Can you please elaborate on the final loopholes part?

Loopholes often get conflated with "tax loopholes", but I just mean to say look for all opportunities instead of the ones that are common societal narratives (those are the ones that are very easy to get conditioned by!)

A common example: when everyone was caught up in the Gold Rush, the common narrative was "strike it big by finding gold!"... however, the guys selling the shovels were better off than the average speculator. The shovels were where the money was to be made.

Another example: there are many ways to climb the career ladder at a corporation. There's the HR policy way, where they hand you a list of bullet points and checkmarks and you tick them off, put in your time, and slowly climb your way up. Or you can take a risk, maybe try out a low-risk, high-reward experiment on your own time, show proof of a highly successful outcome, get to know influencers in senior positions, and find ways to market your accomplishments. Those skills will probably get you way further.

Re: Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

#203

Post by baud147258 »

Kimitri wrote: post #45
baud147258 wrote: post #8

The past few months have taught me that I suck at my job. But I've gotten better at bullshitting my way out of a tight spot. Also learned that running can feel good.

That final sentence caught my attention. I tried to make a daily habit of jogging. I really tried. I held on to the habit for more than two years before finally giving up. It just never started to feel good. Not a moment of it. Got any good advice on how to make running feel good?

Well, I didn't even tried to do a daily jog, closer to a weekly one. I had to prepare for a short (5 km) foot race, with some elevation (200 m) with my uncle, which I was doing mostly on a dare, when I hadn't run in a few years. I've never done a lot of sport either (a little bike riding and rock climbing, currently).

So started doing some weekly job on a short distances (4-7 km) on a nice run (île au cygnes + banks of the Seine) and it just felt good, whereas the last times I felt pretty terrible. Perhaps because those times I didn't push myself too hard or unlike the previous times, stretched afterward. I don't know.

And I finished just behind my uncle, less than a minute after him, I was a little disappointed, but still happy to have made a good time (~ 30 min, if I remember right).

Re: Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

#204

Post by kup0 »

mboekhoff wrote: post #83
kup0 wrote: post #15

I now know what true loss feels like. Lost my grandmother (who raised me and was a mother to me) about six months ago. Things have felt weird ever since, but I'm handling it better than I expected. It might be a different story once I feel comfortable starting to go through her things (I lived with and helped take care of her). I've gotten closer to some other family members since. I realized that I can handle more t…

I lost my mum just slightly over a year ago, so I know the feeling. And all I really can say is that I'm truly sorry for your loss and that I hope you can one day look back and remember the good things. I guess that's all that one can ask for when presented with situations like these. Good luck with everything.

Thank you. We had all sorts of good times, so it’s good to have a reminder to focus on those.

Re: Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

#205

Post by kup0 »

throwaway8879 wrote: post #32
kup0 wrote: post #15

I now know what true loss feels like. Lost my grandmother (who raised me and was a mother to me) about six months ago. Things have felt weird ever since, but I'm handling it better than I expected. It might be a different story once I feel comfortable starting to go through her things (I lived with and helped take care of her). I've gotten closer to some other family members since. I realized that I can handle more t…

Sorry to hear that, friend.

Thank you.

Re: Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

#206

Post by FearNotDaniel »

astrodev wrote: post #164
FearNotDaniel wrote: post #152

Earlier quoted context omitted.

More correctly, it will give you a toolkit for identifying vulnerable women who do not have the self esteem to detect and avoid abusive relationships, and a set of behaviours you can use to exploit their insecurity to build physical relationships with women you despise. If you're looking for relationships that have emotional connection, support, and mutual respect and understanding, you may want to look for advice el…

I have studied the Red Pill in quite detail. It is not really for me to apply (being shy is the opposite of imposing your will on others), but I think the principles are sound. At least I couldn't find any hole in this "worldview", though I would love to, since the the picture it presents is very bleak.

It's possible that you may be inadvertently behaving in ways that amount to "sexual anorexia", a pattern of actions that amounts to self-sabotage where you unconsciously prevent yourself from getting the very thing you want. Maybe these will offer a different perspective:

https://saa-recovery.org/diversity/isa/

https://www.slaauk.org/is-slaa-for-me/anorexia-sexual-social...

Re: Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

#207

Post by mattmanser »

tcmb wrote: post #51

I have a flight reflex which makes me run away when things get tough. I quit a number of jobs because of that and then rationalized it to myself by blaming it on whatever wasn't perfect at these companies. I like to feel I'm the victim of circumstances, blaming hardships on some abstract entity (like fate), subconsciously hoping that 'fate' will prove me wrong by making something good happen to me. I am using substan…

I'd also like to hear what good things you found out about yourself!

It's good to be self-aware, but don't just pick at your bad points. How would your friends and family describe you. If you were your friend, how would you describe yourself?

Re: Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

#208

Post by cableshaft »

BigHatLogan wrote: post #87
cableshaft wrote: post #84

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is basically describing exactly how I've been stuck at my current job that I hate for the past year, although instead of 'attending a lot of weddings' it's 'planning our wedding'. Something is always coming up, and I keep putting off doing what I need to do to prepare for and land that next job, especially with the insane technical quiz hurdles thrown up at pretty much every job interview nowadays. At this point…

First, congratulations on the wedding! Yeah, exactly--you nailed it. The mind is incredibly capable of coming up with excuses to put things off. If you don't plan things out and come up with a schedule, then you'll inevitably find that the time has more or less slipped out of your grasp. Today, it's, "I'll wait for the wedding." Tomorrow, it's, "We just got married! I want to spend some time settling down!" And so on…

I wish I had that 'spend some time settling down' excuse. We've been living together for over two years now, and we bought a house together a year ago.

It'll probably be something else, though, like "I need to get caught up with everything around the house we've been neglecting for months" or something.

Re: Ask HN: What have the past 12 months taught you?

#209

Post by startup_sr »

astrodev wrote: post #169
futureastronaut wrote: post #90

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You're probably being too picky. There are lots of women who would practically throw themselves at somebody like you describe, no matter how shy you are, if you faintly returned their interest. We all have our standards, but it's a bit disingenuous to claim that you're cursed to a lifetime of virginity.

I may have some standards, but I have never had a chance to reject someone. This is actually very puzzling to me - most guys seem to at least have the option of meeting the extremely unattractive / obese women. I don't.

something doesn't add up. If you have any close friends or relatives, discuss with them. They are very likely to point out that you are sorely lacking that one piece of social skill. Once you improve that there will be no lack of meeting and choosing right woman for you. Ps: From 40+ yr old married guy.
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