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The Loneliness Epidemic

melmagazine.com

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Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#241

Post by badpun »

buboard wrote: post #159
badpun wrote: post #23

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Polish society was very heavily wounded by 50 years of hardcore socialism combined with the police state (at the hands of the Soviets). The levels of trust people have towards each other are still abysmally low. I wouldn't use Poland as an example, because it is (like other post-Soviet block states) still very much not normal.

And who would you use?

Countries that didn't have any major plights in the past couple of centuries? Like maybe Switzerland, Scandinavian countries, maybe the US (if we exclude the black population).

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#243

Post by badpun »

oposa wrote: post #172
LordFast wrote: post #133

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Interesting. Anecdotally, this checks out. All of my middle/lower-middle class friends from high school have long been married and raising families, almost in all cases raising them with their extended families. Most of my professional tech friends are barely getting started in their late 30s, and everyone who's started had basically put their career into a slower gear first. I made a similar choice a couple of years…

By definition you wouldn't know many lonely people. The chronically lonely ones are going to be the people who didn't end up getting married when they "should" have, couldn't make it into a proper career or fell out of one at some point. Most upper middle class people won't be lonely since if you can afford a career you can afford a social life or you might even be forced into one. But of course uncertainty and insec…

> Most upper middle class people won't be lonely since if you can afford a career you can afford a social life or you might even be forced into one.

Social life is not about having money (well unless you're really poor) - it's about having time and people to spend it with. You can be in top 5-10% of income and a total loner - plenty such people in tech.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#244

Post by mcdramamean »

Why do we need to "run away" from loneliness? Maybe we all need to spend more time alone AND off the phone to discover what really "makes us tick"? Find yourself, find a mission, find a purpose. Go do something. There is SOOOO much to be done... I mean it.. Like RIGHT NOW. If you don't have a mission.. Bruh... Go get one. Loneliness is simply childish. Children sit around and wish someone would talk to them. Adults go join other adults to make something happen; or they learn to be with themselves. If you can't find happiness within; it's not going to come from you visiting your parents, or seeing your grandchildren, or insert whatever Hallmark phrase you like. Sure being surrounded by people you love when you die will feel nice. But you can truly "rest in peace" if you know you tried your hardest to make a difference (and you actually do!.. Because you actually can...)

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#246

Post by condercet »

alexashka wrote: post #221

It's more of a journalist epidemic - they keep reaching for straw-men to justify their existence. Talking about loneliness is slightly more interesting than what dress celebrity X wore at event Y. It's just bullshit - at least the dress talk doesn't pretend otherwise, for the most part. We're living in the greatest time ever. I understand that when you make no money and you're writing articles, it may seem like there…

On the contrary, many of the people I've met who most definitely do not have first world problems -- people living in Africa, Southeast Asia, and other destitute parts of the world -- often seem to lead genuinely happier lives than the stressed out existence that is the norm in the US.

Being able to have a cheeseburger delivered on demand does not make up for systematic loneliness and dehumanization. The more I travel, the more perspective I get, the more I think that things have gone deeply wrong here.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#247

Post by leetcrew »

quacked wrote: post #236

I think I'll be a little buried, but a thought- where can you go to hang out and not spend any money? Seems like historical gathering places all now cost money, or you're not allowed to be there.

there are places left where you can hang out for free, public parks are a good example. the "problem" is that they attract the type of people who can't or don't want to pay for a space to hang out.

most people aren't interested in a place where they can go and meet anyone; they want a place where they can meet others who share some vaguely defined set of similarities. this is the part you have to pay for.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#248

Post by leetcrew »

imesh wrote: post #176
ronnier wrote: post #125

These articles rarely if ever mention the breakdown between men and women. I do believe loneliness is largely something men deal with.

Why?

anecdotally (and not GP), most of the women I am friends with have several good friends in the area where they live and easily make new ones if they ever move to a new place. for many of my male friends, I am the only friend they have in the area.

I don't think I can generalize to entire genders from my experience though. it could simply be that it's easier for introverts to make same-gender friendships, so I only have a set of relatively outgoing women to select friends from.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#249

Post by wes-k »

quacked wrote: post #236

I think I'll be a little buried, but a thought- where can you go to hang out and not spend any money? Seems like historical gathering places all now cost money, or you're not allowed to be there.

Agreed! Try not drinking alcohol or caffeine and your places to meetup disappear.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#250

Post by swsieber »

oxw wrote: post #6
rofo1 wrote: post #3

It only makes sense for this epidemic to take place in the society we've developed. We are tearing apart the fabric and the bond that kept everyone feeling as a part of community; namely, religion. Religion was never designed for people to fear the man upstairs; it was always about the values and the bond it created between each member of that religion. Individualism and decadence are being more or less encouraged, o…

Excerpt from the article: "It turns out there’s also not much evidence to support a popular theory that the increasing secularization of Western societies — where religion is seen as a traditional route for people to regularly come together — is a major factor driving modern loneliness. Counterintuitively, says Hewings, “It would seem on a number of different surveys that levels of loneliness are lower in Northern an…

A relative difference between two regions in terms of loneliness and religiousness doesn't really signal anything quite frankly. There can be a negative relationship between the two with other things affecting them. Or there might not be, but that evidence is rather thin.
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