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The Loneliness Epidemic

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Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#121

Post by gordaco »

gordaco wrote: post #106
dexwiz wrote: post #34

The Screen and the Job have displaced almost everything else is our lives. Loneliness is just a primary symptom. The Screen, whether it’s TV, computer, or phone, has supplanted almost all social interactions. This manifests itself in things like SitComs on TV (just a bunch of friends or family hanging out) or Social Media on phones. It’s very easy to fill the social needs of right now with a Screen. But under even a…

All of this is 100% correct. In particular: the amount of choices that have become "career killers" and therefore unacceptable is terrifying. Choose a degree that appeals to you, where you will learn what you like, instead of one which acts as a stepping stone for a higher paying job? Even in countries with sane tuition prices (read: not the US) plenty of people will blame you, and that decision in particular, for an…

I just found something very indicative of the current times: in Ask A Manager (a blog about work where the owner answers questions from her readers) someone is afraid that not working during the evenings or the weekends is going to hurt their job prospects. The article has been published today.

https://www.askamanager.org/2019/07/can-you-advance-professi...

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#122

Post by calcifer »

rayiner wrote: post #115
dexwiz wrote: post #34

The Screen and the Job have displaced almost everything else is our lives. Loneliness is just a primary symptom. The Screen, whether it’s TV, computer, or phone, has supplanted almost all social interactions. This manifests itself in things like SitComs on TV (just a bunch of friends or family hanging out) or Social Media on phones. It’s very easy to fill the social needs of right now with a Screen. But under even a…

> The average person has to consider all options in the light of both the current employer and the specter of tomorrow’s. Moving across the country for a high paying job? Great! Moving to be closer to friends? That’s a career killer. The median person lives just 18 miles away from their mom. 57% of Americans have never lived outside their home state. A third have never lived outside their hometown. The more I read ab…

> The more I read about it, I’m convinced “loneliness” is an upper middle class problem.

Which makes it all the more suitable for a discussion on HN, wouldn't you say?

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#123

Post by radcon »

dwg465 wrote: post #117
defterGoose wrote: post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Some friends of mine from college and I, while considering our impending matriculation into the housing and job market of LA, conceived of the idea of 'failure house'; a place where we could all live when we failed at life. We still talk about it ten years on, and it has evolved into the idea of 'failure commune'. One of these friends became a lawyer and bought a house in Orange County recently. Traitor.

I just graduated college and am having similar thoughts (but think Bay Area instead of LA). It seems like a great idea but I know of few examples besides full-on communes. Do you know of any examples of living communities or living styles that fall somewhere between living on your own and living on a commune?

Look up online communities dedicated to Homesteading. There also seems to be a movement around "backyard chickens" (i.e. raising small amounts of livestock at an average suburban house).

So far I haven't come across any information on physical communities of homesteaders, although a local community seems like a necessity if you ever want to take a vacation again. Can't really leave crops on their own for very long without them dying, let alone livestock...

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#124

Post by T1glober »

mises wrote: post #40

> "You can see the problem here: A national culture that promotes polite restraint, and which actively fends off and forestalls the forming of relationships between strangers, is one that might as well be inviting loneliness on its population. And at a time when emotional seclusion is increasingly being seen as a crisis in countries around the Western world, perhaps this is what has made English people uniquely sensi…

Not from the South myself, but I noticed a similar trend in parts of the Midwest and anywhere that's not a big city.

Similar to the UK would be somewhere like Japan, which is well-known for its culture of restraint and politeness. Loneliness and suicide rates are high, while dating and marriage are suffering. It would appear a result of having a relatively restrained social culture.

PS. what is the spotify trick?

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#126

Post by astura »

bilbo0s wrote: post #57
dexwiz wrote: post #34

The Screen and the Job have displaced almost everything else is our lives. Loneliness is just a primary symptom. The Screen, whether it’s TV, computer, or phone, has supplanted almost all social interactions. This manifests itself in things like SitComs on TV (just a bunch of friends or family hanging out) or Social Media on phones. It’s very easy to fill the social needs of right now with a Screen. But under even a…

It's also interesting that nowadays when people lose their jobs, it triggers an almost existential crisis in them. It's kind of sad to watch. I wish people could understand that they are more than their job. It's so ingrained in us though. One of the first things people asks each other is, "What do you do?" It encourages a definition of self that is centered on one's job. If it weren't real life, I'd think I was watc…

Cheap and readily available credit makes people dependent on their jobs. Its totally normal to think of affordability on a monthly payment basis. That means we have people who have very little savings after all their monthly payments. When you lose your job you can't make all those monthly payments anymore its a crisis.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#127

Post by cableshaft »

defterGoose wrote: post #41
radcon wrote: post #17

At the risk of sounding like a crazy hippy, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that some kind of subsistence-based neighborhoods would be a great option for dealing with this problem. Not only would it provide some relief from the feeling of being shackled to bullshit jobs for life if you don't want to starve to death, it would also help foster much stronger communities.

Some friends of mine from college and I, while considering our impending matriculation into the housing and job market of LA, conceived of the idea of 'failure house'; a place where we could all live when we failed at life. We still talk about it ten years on, and it has evolved into the idea of 'failure commune'. One of these friends became a lawyer and bought a house in Orange County recently. Traitor.

Let him know you're so happy that he bought the first house for the failure commune and tell him when you can move in.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#128

Post by devtul »

gordaco wrote: post #106
dexwiz wrote: post #34

The Screen and the Job have displaced almost everything else is our lives. Loneliness is just a primary symptom. The Screen, whether it’s TV, computer, or phone, has supplanted almost all social interactions. This manifests itself in things like SitComs on TV (just a bunch of friends or family hanging out) or Social Media on phones. It’s very easy to fill the social needs of right now with a Screen. But under even a…

All of this is 100% correct. In particular: the amount of choices that have become "career killers" and therefore unacceptable is terrifying. Choose a degree that appeals to you, where you will learn what you like, instead of one which acts as a stepping stone for a higher paying job? Even in countries with sane tuition prices (read: not the US) plenty of people will blame you, and that decision in particular, for an…

Seems to be more a problem of expectations than anything else, people are too focused on being successful than being happy, on having it all.

I would gleefully take a pay cut to have a 35h work week _if my wage still allows me to eat out once 3x a week_, but I will work 40h + commute and feel always exhausted until I get there. See how easy is to fall on that trap.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#129

Post by LandR »

JackFr wrote: post #58
mox1 wrote: post #54

Earlier quoted context omitted.

You think that today in 2019, we spend more time at "work" than at any other time in history? That's just false. Over the 20th century here, work hours have slashed in half. Henry Ford introduced the 5 day work week in 1926, prior to that it was 6. You think the average farmer in the late 1800's worked 40-50 hours? What about the average coal miner, or factory worker?

And less of our time at work is spent actually working.

This might sound good in theory, but time spent at work not working can be soul destroying.

Re: The Loneliness Epidemic

#130

Post by jdietrich »

freehunter wrote: post #114
kinos wrote: post #110

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Back when people had up to 6 months of time off a year?[1] [1] https://groups.csail.mit.edu/mac/users/rauch/worktime/hours_...

If modern people had half the year they could consider free time, no one would be lonely.

Retirees and the unemployed report high levels of loneliness.
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