161–170 of 250 posts
Earlier quoted context omitted.
But moving away is a choice to abandon your family.
“abandon” is an interesting word choice. Moving isn’t always about moving away from something, sometimes it’s about moving towards a happy prospect. Your family could respect the action.
As an anecdote, I've lived the majority of my life in America (born and raised middle class on the east coast in a wealthy area) and if I was tasked with writing an account of my time here it would be focused around one thing: alienation. American life is atomized and consistently getting more so. For anyone who sits around and thinks about why people are the way they are here I highly encourage you to consider that…
Yes big cities can be alienating. That's why I opted out.
So they're more social than I am?
It seems from the comments here that solitude is equated with isolation and with loneliness but this is not necessarily the case.
I think the problem for many who are lonely is that they feel, perhaps correctly, that they have no choice, no power to change the situation. For me solitude is a necessity but of course if I cannot choose it but instead have it thrust upon me then it would eventually become a burden.
My father passed away around 11 years back and it wasn't til several years later that it really hit me that my mom was basically all alone for large portions of her day out on the a country property. I now call her and chat for about 20 minutes a day on my commute home. I know that it has made a huge difference in her life and I feel more connected to her than ever before. I highly recommend that others take some tim…
This is also why a lot of spouses pass soon after the other. They lose hope and the reason to get out of bed each morning. I keep assuming that as jobs are automated away that we are going to have more people who can do work like visiting elderly people. It also can more than pay for itself by keeping people on their medication regimens and preventing costly hospital visits.
Many Americans own a lot of idle property. There is a problem now where baby boomers want to age in place in their suburban homes, which locks younger people out of those properties. However these suburban homes have huge yards by global standards, that could easily support the construction of grandparent/in-law structures. It seems like one solution is for the suburban elderly to, maybe with their children's assista…
A big obstacle to having extended families under one roof is that often the children don't want to live where the parents' home is located. I am certain I could move in with my mom tomorrow if I wanted--but it would mean leaving a city I've come to love and the career I've built here to live in a small town with little culture and zero opportunities. I think this is what you see in many rural American towns where onl…
I lived with my parents during college. It was expected because they couldn't afford to pay for a dorm for me.
I think it delayed my growth.
Also, having had grandparents who were quite lonely in their later years, a lot of this can probably be attributed to a reluctance to move out of their house and into group living situations specifically for the elderly (such as assisted living). If you are not very mobile and staying in a SFH, it can be a 30m ordeal just to get up and use the landline. And traveling outside your home requires someone else to drive and help you get in/out of the car.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
You are not in the minority. Everyone needs time to be alone. You will start feeling alone when you get back from hunting and nobody is waiting for you.
When I get home Saturday afternoons, I'm mobbed by my sons who are looking forward to riding on the mower. :) It's one of the things we all look forward to: lawn work. I pay my sons to pick up and rake. I pay them to use the blower and take out the trash. I teaching them that they should be paid for their efforts, but also that if they don't work, they don't get paid. One of my sons is eager beaver and on fire for an…
I may be in the minority, but the older I get the more I want to be alone. I love my wife and kids, but there is almost too much pressure anymore to do this, do that. There are too many hands on my time. I recharge only when alone. I cannot do it with the TV on, kids in the background, etc. It's one of the reasons I like hunting. Just me and the great outdoors. I really like getting up at 0430 and being in the deer b…
I may be in the minority, but the older I get the more I want to be alone. I love my wife and kids, but there is almost too much pressure anymore to do this, do that. There are too many hands on my time. I recharge only when alone. I cannot do it with the TV on, kids in the background, etc. It's one of the reasons I like hunting. Just me and the great outdoors. I really like getting up at 0430 and being in the deer b…
I certainly don’t, I chose the office with no windows on the opposite side the building to everyone else with the lights out and the AC cranked to the max I’m happy.
I have a small led desk lamp so I don’t walk into things and that’s it.