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It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

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Re: It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

#61

Post by sidcool »

solresol wrote: post #50
sidcool wrote: post #47

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I wish I could figure out. My best guesses are: 1. I am getting older and not doing anything remotely impactful. 2. People half my age know all the programming I know. I don't bring anything special to the table. 3. Is this what life is all about? Now, I don't say the problem is with the world. Something could be wrong with me. But damned if I know.

I have nothing to do with this thread, but felt like answering anyway... 1. Very few people leave a legacy. The people that do often didn't do it deliberately or intentionally. 2. They don't. There might be a few people half your age that know as much about programming as you do, but the majority don't. In any case, you are the worst person to judge what special thing you bring to the table. Go and ask one of these y…

Thanks for your reply. I would love to take a break and explore the spiritual side of me, but it would need too much of rearranging my life and it may not be worth it. As such I am scared of drastic change, this would just add to the anxiety. Anything I can do with my current flow of life?

Re: It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

#62

Post by scns »

sidcool wrote: post #61
solresol wrote: post #50

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I have nothing to do with this thread, but felt like answering anyway... 1. Very few people leave a legacy. The people that do often didn't do it deliberately or intentionally. 2. They don't. There might be a few people half your age that know as much about programming as you do, but the majority don't. In any case, you are the worst person to judge what special thing you bring to the table. Go and ask one of these y…

Thanks for your reply. I would love to take a break and explore the spiritual side of me, but it would need too much of rearranging my life and it may not be worth it. As such I am scared of drastic change, this would just add to the anxiety. Anything I can do with my current flow of life?

Start meditating, check out the book "Mind Illuminated"

Re: It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

#63

Post by crispinb »

taneq wrote: post #60
crispinb wrote: post #44

Earlier quoted context omitted.

It also makes some horrific assumptions about 'success', borrowed unthinkingly from one narrow strand of contemporary hyper-consumerist crap culture. I certainly wouldn't call Kroc nor Sanders 'successful'.

That was my thought, what does "successful" mean if not "being happy". Someone living comfortably and loving every day is more "successful" than someone stressed out and crying on their private cruise liner.

It does fits pretty well with much tech/YC/SV ideology though: hypertrophy for its own sake.

Re: It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

#64

Post by JacKTrocinskI »

For those that say success != happiness, I'm on your side but... know your worth, don't let others leech off your work, not give you adequate pay, or dangle promises of a promotion for years on end. It's one thing to like what you do and be happy doing it and it's another thing to be successful. It is my opinion that people will bank off your talents if you let them and I think that that will eventually make any person unhappy and possibly kill your drive for doing what you like.

Re: It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

#65

Post by seventhtiger »

dasyatidprime wrote: post #11
cecilpl2 wrote: post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I'm trying to convince myself to try anyway What else are you going to do? You are where you are right now, and you can either put in the effort to make your life better or you can give up now. The time's going to pass anyway, you might as well make the most of it.

If that worked enough of the time, articles like the OP wouldn't get written much. Emotionally speaking, giving up is actually a pretty sticky idea! The potential for putting a pile of effort in, finding it wasn't really enough, and being confronted afterward with all the things you did wrong with no chance to correct them now is paralyzing ; it's “safer” in a way to not try, never know, and only experience the one,…

At a very low point of my life, I read a book that had an idea that tickled me out of it.

In the first few pages the protagonist decides to end their own life. He is absolutely committed to ending it. Once the decision was made he realized that there is no longer any significant consequences to anything. So he will do whatever he wants until he eventually kills himself. In the end the adventure he went on helped him realize that there is something to life and he backed off.

Giving up can be freeing. It is a declaration of emotional bankruptcy.

Re: It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

#66

Post by codeisawesome »

Mixed feelings on this post. I like the author's insistence on late success being something worthy of striving for, but there's still a significant amount of bitterness in the form of "oh look at those poor souls with early success, it destroyed their life, good thing we're not like that huh" which is a toxic way to feel good/inspired.

Re: It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

#67

Post by badestrand »

keyle wrote: post #30
lanrh1836 wrote: post #5

This makes the wrong assumption that happiness comes with success. Success doesn’t bring happiness. If anything, being happy in the first place is what gives you a better chance at achieving success.

Exactly. Even the quote used: > “Comparison is the thief of joy.” —Theodore Roosevelt Isn't 'success' a form of comparison? How do you quantify success? Is it binary? Is it a validation from peers? Do your own thing, be excellent at it, have fun.

> Isn't 'success' a form of comparison? How do you quantify success?

The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language gives the two meanings

- The achievement of something desired, planned, or attempted.

- The gaining of fame or prosperity.

of which the first one is entirely void of comparison. Your biggest desire is to live in a nice house in the country side with a wife and two kids? If you achieved that, congratulations, you are successful!

Re: It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

#68

Post by codeisawesome »

dasyatidprime wrote: post #11
cecilpl2 wrote: post #8

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I'm trying to convince myself to try anyway What else are you going to do? You are where you are right now, and you can either put in the effort to make your life better or you can give up now. The time's going to pass anyway, you might as well make the most of it.

If that worked enough of the time, articles like the OP wouldn't get written much. Emotionally speaking, giving up is actually a pretty sticky idea! The potential for putting a pile of effort in, finding it wasn't really enough, and being confronted afterward with all the things you did wrong with no chance to correct them now is paralyzing ; it's “safer” in a way to not try, never know, and only experience the one,…

Hi You sound naturally ambitious but scared of failure because of the perfectionism. This might seem very off-topic but "helping others" seems to have a strange but good effect on this psychological debuff. I am not going to try and explain it, probably something along the lines of realising there are people who are even worse combined with the natural social programming to feel good when you help the group. That combo seems to help overcome fear. Build something because you care about the people who will benefit from it and it will bring them joy. Also consider that maybe the other guy doing it better than you prices it out of the reach of people who need it? Your unique contribution to society is still sorely needed by many, many people.

Re: It's Never Too Late to Be Successful and Happy

#69

Post by hellfrick »

scns wrote: post #62
sidcool wrote: post #61

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Thanks for your reply. I would love to take a break and explore the spiritual side of me, but it would need too much of rearranging my life and it may not be worth it. As such I am scared of drastic change, this would just add to the anxiety. Anything I can do with my current flow of life?

Start meditating, check out the book "Mind Illuminated"

+1 for "Mind Illuminated". Culadasa has done great work in synthesising many techniques - try it!
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