I'll engage on this, assuming these questions were asked in good faith.
> should I get to tell them they can't say I'm hairy/bearded (despite that being obviously true)?
You can say, "I'd rather you not refer to me/define me by my beard." Do they have to respect that? Of course not.
Does not respecting that mean that they are now knowingly violating a boundary you've specifically asked them to respect? Yep. Sure does.
Does knowingly/deliberately violating someone's boundaries make you an asshole? Maybe? Probably? At the very least it's likely to make that person like you less.
> Do you think you have a right to dictate others use of pronouns?
I have the right to indicate that my pronouns are they/them, just as you can (presumably) indicate yours are he/him. When people deliberately violate that (e.g., if people started calling you 'the bearded lady' or used she to refer to you) I believe I am well within my right to feel disrespected, just as if they had used any other verbal insult. I see it in a similar light to nicknames. If my name was William, and I tell people to please call me William, and someone continually refers to me as Billy despite being asked not to, then I'm going to feel disrespected.
I get sir/he/him/his/etc all the time. When it's people I'm close to (colleagues, friends, etc.) I'll gently offer a correction and move on. e.g. "Sorry, my pronouns are they/them, please, continue." I don't bother correcting the gas station attendant or the coffee shop barista.
I generally assume most times the wrong pronouns aren't coming from a place of malice -- either someone just forgot or they don't know. I give people a lot of latitude.