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Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

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Re: Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

#21

Post by cx42net »

apo wrote: post #4

> Today was the tipping when I was trying to explain some basic mathematics to my daughter, and managed to lost here, making her more confused than before. How many questions do you ask during your explanations? I ask because it's very easy to get wrapped up in your own words, ignoring the blooming confusion in the person you're talking with. You might try some experiments around asking questions. For example, when y…

Thank you for your advice.

I did asked a lot of question, at every step of the explanation, to ensure she was following, but when I tried to wrap it all, that's where I lost her.

I might also have tried to explain her something she's not ready to understand based on her school level, that might be a a part of why she didn't understood my explanation.

Re: Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

#22

Post by cx42net »

iamasuperuser wrote: post #2

I don’t think that there is a quick fix, but I have found the following useful; 1. Think in billboards (Construct your explanation in less than 16 words) 2. Increase your vocabulary. Try wordthink.com daily. 3. Hold off. Don’t speak just yet. Seek to compact your explanation. 4. Reframe it as an analogy or metaphor 5. Even if your audience isn’t a 5 year old, try to describe your idea in a way that they would underst…

Thank you. I'll try to think more in giving explanation under 16 words or less. Even if that doesn't work, it will be a nice exercice to follow :)

Re: Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

#24

Post by cx42net »

nf05papsjfVbc wrote: post #13

If you are able to put yourself in the shoes of the people to whom you are explaining something, the rest will follow. Consider what they already know and how you can bring them to your point by starting with something familiar and known. If you have that point covered, the rest is "thinking clearly" and "expressing oneself clearly". These require practice as much as placing yourself in the shoes of the audience.

I have the faculty to feel what others feels, and that's worse in my case. I feel when I lose them, which make me start to want to explain more, which in turn worsen the situation.

Maybe in that case I should try to stop that feeling and go with my initial idea ... while keeping in mind whom I'm adressing to (like you say in your comment)

Re: Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

#25

Post by cx42net »

mbrock wrote: post #12

One thing might be to start by describing things at a less detailed level, perhaps focusing on why something is interesting, or a personal story like how you learned about this thing, or something else that lets you share your enthusiasm without getting bogged down in fully teaching the thing. Hopefully this can be done in a way that sparks the curiosity that will let you proceed to more engaged discussion.

Yep. I need to work on filtering what I'm explaining, keeping the simple things at first, then increasing the difficulty if asked.

That's a challenge in itself :)

Re: Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

#26

Post by cx42net »

domod wrote: post #11

I had the same problem at work. My former manager recommended me to read about storytelling and especially “the pyramid principle” [1] by barbara minto. It helped me a lot in how to frame a message and make the message logically easiest to absorb. [1] Barbara Minto - The Pyramid Principle

You are indeed not the first to mention this book. I'll see if I can grab a copy. Thanks.

Re: Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

#27

Post by cx42net »

AnimalMuppet wrote: post #19

Rehearse. Try to explain something, as if you were explaining it to someone else. (It doesn't have to be out loud - you can do the conversation in your head.) You can kind of tell that some parts don't work. Try again. And again. After several times, you find better ways to explain it. Now go try it on a real person. At this step, it may work out differently than it did in your own head! Don't get discouraged by that…

Yep. I think I need to keep working on trying to explain things, finding alternative ways to be understood and find something that works.

Thanks :)

Re: Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

#28

Post by cx42net »

otras wrote: post #8

Before I got into tech, I worked as a full-time tutor with high school and middle school students for a few years. That was the best practice for improving my ability to explain things. I usually think about the meta-game of improving in roughly three different ways: 1. Explaining many things to many people: you really get good at thinking on your feet, reading how well different people understand things, and coming…

As others said, "really knowing the material" is one of the important things that can cause confusion.

Practicing is also important, but for that, I need people that are willing to listen to me struggle.

Thank you for your help.

Re: Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

#29

Post by Srishti101 »

I try a simple practice technique before big presentations. Just sit in a room alone and record your voice as you present. That will help you see your communication errors, slows, bad sentences etc. Its just practice. I learned from working with some of the best presenters I know, they spent years working very hard before each presentation/discussion and that helps them get better. They make it all look magical but its just a lot of hard work behind their seamless flow of thought.

Re: Ask HN: I'm poor at explaining things, how can I fix that?

#30

Post by nf05papsjfVbc »

cx42net wrote: post #24
nf05papsjfVbc wrote: post #13

If you are able to put yourself in the shoes of the people to whom you are explaining something, the rest will follow. Consider what they already know and how you can bring them to your point by starting with something familiar and known. If you have that point covered, the rest is "thinking clearly" and "expressing oneself clearly". These require practice as much as placing yourself in the shoes of the audience.

I have the faculty to feel what others feels, and that's worse in my case. I feel when I lose them, which make me start to want to explain more, which in turn worsen the situation. Maybe in that case I should try to stop that feeling and go with my initial idea ... while keeping in mind whom I'm adressing to (like you say in your comment)

One aspect of placing yourself in their shoes is to feel how they feel. Another aspect is to see what they understand from what you are trying to explain. This requires a different kind of skill - of trying to see things from the perspective of different context, culture, skill, knowledge or language (do these words mean the same things for them?). It is this aspect that I had in mind and from your answer I get the impression that you meant the former instead.
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