Ask HN: How can I make the most out of high school?

Just go to college and study what you like. Contrary to the popular belief, mathematics and computer science aren't solitary pursuits. You'll meet people who share your interests and ways of being.

Just keep making friends. Keep it a priority and learn to get to know people. Don't stress too much if it doesn't feel like it's working. If you keep this as a goal and make the effort it will happen. I don't think you are alone in this. Western societies are getting more and more isolated. Finding people you connect with is not easy.

I don't keep in contact with any of my high school friends now. I've made new ones as an adult. I've changed so much since high school so has everyone I was friends with so we just don't have that much in common any more. So I wouldn't stress to much that you're missing out on high school connections.

You will need friends in life but you'll find a way to make them.

In my experience, life has become more fun and carefree since I've become an adult, not vice versa. It's ironic, as youd expect adult life to be laden with more responsibity and "seriousness" but the truth is that work is easier than school (as long as you're not married with children), and you have financial freedom to pursue your interests. Your adult life can be what you make it. You're not stuck with the same social group so you're free to associate with who you want. I wouldn't go back to high school or even college if I had the chance.

Like you said, you can't force friendship, your best bet is to make more casual friendships and then develop the ones that are a good match.

I recently began consciously developing my casual social skills (small talk). I make a point of smiling and greeting people at every opportunity.

Many of my coworkers are silent until spoken to, at which point they smile with delight and really open up to you.

Beyond that, I would say, clarify as best you can the type of friends you are looking for. What exactly do you mean by close friends? What kind of things would close friends do together, or do for each other? Figure out what that is, and then see if there are opportunities for doing those things in your existing relationships.

A friend once told me, years after the fact, that a favor I did for him was very meaningful to him. Nobody had done anything like that for him before, and it was instrumental to our lasting friendship.

tldr (1) social skills will improve with practice (2) to have a friend, be a friend

Best wishes