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The company has recently hired an additional project manager overseas who has already started excluding me from project meetings. Another project manager has been hired to work in the local office and is starting next week.
I get the feeling I’m now meant to be sitting in the corner with my headphones on.
There are many companies hiring PMs and to be honest, it is hard to find good ones, passionate about their job and that were previously coders or know well about tech, as not many developers enjoy that route(they would rather become tech leads or something else).
The grass is greener on your side as you might think.
If you enjoyed being a PM, ask that you want to become one in your company, if you can't, just look for a new job in that role. There are many companies hiring PMs and to be honest, it is hard to find good ones, passionate about their job and that were previously coders or know well about tech, as not many developers enjoy that route(they would rather become tech leads or something else). The grass is greener on your…
This is a big red flag. There may be innocent reasons (e.g., new PM wants to hold meetings at times convenient to him and his team and feels guilty inviting you to meetings at 2AM your time), but it is more often a prep for pushing old PM out the door.
You have two options: change things at your old company, or move. In first option, I would try to get a candid face to face time with one of the senior leadership folks. Ask about their plans. Say that your old project does not need two PMs and ask if he can suggest other PM opportunities. This only works if you are appreciated at your current company, but if you are the company will likely work hard to accommodate your wishes -- good PMs are rare.
> The company has recently hired an additional project manager overseas who has already started excluding me from project meetings. This is a big red flag. There may be innocent reasons (e.g., new PM wants to hold meetings at times convenient to him and his team and feels guilty inviting you to meetings at 2AM your time), but it is more often a prep for pushing old PM out the door. You have two options: change things…
I was livid. “We have a new guy... who doesn’t understand the product or our customers or our process... and I am supposed to answer to HIM now‽”
Some advice I wish I could go back 10 years and give myself:
1. “Own what you own” which is a variation of “choose which hill to die on”. If you feel like something is “yours” you will resent people coming in and fucking it up. If you conceptualize something as “theirs” you can feel good doing your best to make it better. Being a humble servant can feel bad, but it feels better than being fired for having angry outbursts (trust me on this one).
2. Understand your feelings well enough to talk about them. That might involve talk therapy. Modern CBT is really great.
3. Remember that anything you love can break your heart. And that is OK. Better than not loving what you do. Maybe it is time for the relationship to end? Maybe you can salvage it?
4. Think and talk in terms of both work/life balance and work-life balance. If having a diverse set of things to do at work is important to you (it is to me, but not everyone) tell the company this. Some people love to be heads down coders in one layer. Other people need to work across more layers. Some people like to do PM or architecture work in addition to coding. Your managers won’t know what you need if you don’t tell them, and you can’t tell them if you don’t understand it yourself. (See #2).
Good luck! You are not in this alone!