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The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

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Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#101

Post by Eric_WVGG »

finaliteration wrote: post #34

My wife’s grandparents are very much the “you aren’t leaving until you clear your plate” kind of people and it’s given her mother a lot of anxiety around food and weight. I grew up in a family of 7 where food was scarce and some nights you were lucky to get anything at all for dinner so I’m also inclined to eat way too much at each meal. Because of this (and for other reasons) we never ever make our daughter clear he…

My parents were like you (no pressure) and that worked really well across my childhood; then when I struck out on my own, I had a couple "Ramen years" that changed my habits into a clean-plater. Fortunately my metabolism is pretty okay, but it's starting to catch up with me, I now have to make a conscious effort to not over-portion, etc.

Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#102

Post by fotbr »

your-nanny wrote: post #93

just get smaller plates. large plates encourage over eating by encouraging you to put more food on them than is reasonable.

That was the key for me. I switched to smaller plates, and I quit gaining weight. It helped enforce portion control, which I am horribly bad at if left to my own devices.

Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#103

Post by DoreenMichele »

wst_ wrote: post #100
DoreenMichele wrote: post #92

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I was (and still am) a picky eater. I was diagnosed late in life with a genetic disorder, which is the reason I'm a picky eater. I was often criticized for being so picky, but I was never told to clean my plate. It wasn't uncommon for my father to eat what was left on my plate rather than throw it out, but my right to decide what to put in my body was always respected. I think that -- respecting a person's right to c…

Don't you think your condition is special and do not apply to majority? But even if you are a picky eater, the solution seems easy. Just put on your plate enough for a tip of your tongue. If you don't like it it's fine, not much has been wasted that way. There you go. You can keep clear plate rule. Still, I think the major problem is not clear or not the plate but rather do you have an influence on how much it goes o…

Food impacting health is not some weird anomaly that only applies to me. My condition exaggerates the importance. That's all.

Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#104

Post by sturgill »

DoreenMichele wrote: post #92
saagarjha wrote: post #88

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I mean, I was never 100% on cleaning my plate; exceptions were sometimes made if I was sick or there was some other reason that eating everything was a bad idea. The goal was to minimize waste, even if the food was slightly unpleasant; but it’s not like this was militantly enforced. Really, just do whatever is best for you to reduce waste and stay healthy.

I was (and still am) a picky eater. I was diagnosed late in life with a genetic disorder, which is the reason I'm a picky eater. I was often criticized for being so picky, but I was never told to clean my plate. It wasn't uncommon for my father to eat what was left on my plate rather than throw it out, but my right to decide what to put in my body was always respected. I think that -- respecting a person's right to c…

> I think that -- respecting a person's right to control what goes in their body -- is an excellent policy.

This sounds great but breaks down at implementation. My 5 y/o is not yet equipped with the mental discipline to have this autonomy. We force him to try everything we put on his plate. New foods are introduced in small quantities to prevent wastage, but we fully expect him to try all the weird things he is quite sure he hates. If we gave him autonomy, he’d choose candy and soda.

My view on parenting in general is that the whole point is to teach kids to be independent (and to live their own lives in their own houses). But autonomy is granted as a child learns and is capable of understanding the tradeoffs of decisons. And that is the hard part. It’s very simple to take either extreme: “here’s your dinner, eat it!”; “it’s your dinner, eat what you will.” But I think it’s my job as a parent to teach my kid to appreciate food; to eat a balanced meal; to fill up on veggies and supplement with meat and bread; to drink water over soda; that you can’t skip the salad and expect snacks later; that if you choose to not eat that means you’ll be hungry later (where I typically bring back what we had as dinner as the food option); etc.

Really, I think this whole parenting thing is a crapshoot. But I find comfort knowing I’m helping support some future therapist who can help my kids overcome all of my mistakes. It’s my contribution to America’s future GDP...

Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#105

Post by toast0 »

PunchTornado wrote: post #23
sixstringtheory wrote: post #12

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Ridiculous idea to downvote. I almost never finish restaurant meals, I’ll take the second half for lunch the next day or give it to someone on the walk home. But suggesting portion control would be advocating more personal responsibility, so maybe that explains peoples’ “disagreement.” So much easier to toss in the trash, right?

I always feel bad when asking to pack the leftovers at the restaurant. is it rude or a sign of being poor? I'm unsure.

Asking to pack the leftovers is a complement! It says, this was so delicious, I want to have it again. I've had chefs at small restaurants thank me with huge smiles when I asked for a box.

I do feel bad when I can't (or won't) finish, and don't ask for a box. Aiming to eat only half the meal, so you have a good amount to bring home can sometimes help avoid overconsumption, too.

Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#106

Post by DoreenMichele »

sturgill wrote: post #104
DoreenMichele wrote: post #92

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I was (and still am) a picky eater. I was diagnosed late in life with a genetic disorder, which is the reason I'm a picky eater. I was often criticized for being so picky, but I was never told to clean my plate. It wasn't uncommon for my father to eat what was left on my plate rather than throw it out, but my right to decide what to put in my body was always respected. I think that -- respecting a person's right to c…

> I think that -- respecting a person's right to control what goes in their body -- is an excellent policy. This sounds great but breaks down at implementation. My 5 y/o is not yet equipped with the mental discipline to have this autonomy. We force him to try everything we put on his plate. New foods are introduced in small quantities to prevent wastage, but we fully expect him to try all the weird things he is quite…

This sounds great but breaks down at implementation

I was a full-time mom for many years. It did not break down in implementation in my home. In a nutshell, I made healthy options that my kids liked available in adequate quantity. I did not find that they wanted to live on candy.

FWIW, I also required them to taste new foods, especially fruits and vegetables, and not simply reject things out of hand. Though I was a lot younger back then. I'm not sure if I would do that these days if I were raising kids, which isn't likely to happen. But I did do that at the time.

Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#107

Post by [deleted] »

saagarjha wrote: post #4

At the risk of sounding preachy, I was raised with the “clean plate” philosophy and avoided overeating by planning beforehand what I could reasonably eat, and never putting anything more on my plate. Once you get rid of the incentive at the very end to eat just a bit more, I don’t see this as being a huge problem anymore.

[deleted]

Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#108

Post by lazyasciiart »

johnisgood wrote: post #50
pkaye wrote: post #33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think what they are really meaning is "There are starving kids out in the world. Be grateful you have all this food available and don't waste it."

Hmm, yes, I agree with that, but then again: if the kid's parents were to cook less, then the kid would not have had to eat it "forcefully". The only reason I assume force here is because the kid would not need any reasons to be told if s/he is hungry. It seems to me that this is a special scenario, but being grateful for the things you have is not, and should not be a special case, IMO. I am not sure that this is ho…

Do you have kids? Some of the little kids I've known would literally not want to eat anything all day. I don't know if they didn't feel hunger or just didn't yet associate it with eating. And plenty of kids (and adults!) will refuse food they don't like even if they are 'hungry', because during a normal western life they don't actually get that hungry. Because parents don't want to starve their kid into eating vegetables, they need to find methods other than "let them go hungry".

Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#109

Post by gumby »

Kalium wrote: post #98
gumby wrote: post #68

Earlier quoted context omitted.

They do learn to have agency: think plan ahead and make your own decision. Live with the consequences of your decision. As I noted every decision is modulated by parental intervention — if a kid made an obvious mistake, possibly intervene early “are you sure you want six bao? Just take a couple — you can always have more” or late “ok, but see the problem? Next time let’s be more careful.” Yeah, parenting is non-algor…

> Yeah, parenting is non-algorithmic, and once (if?) you get good at it it’s too late to do it again. Arguably multi-generational households with grandparents on hand are able to take advantage of this. This is perhaps not as useful as it was centuries ago, due to how fast society and the situations a family might face have shifted.

Good point. This is one hypothesis for why human females live beyond the end of fertility (so-called “grandmother thesis”)

Re: The ‘clean plate’ mentality drives us to overeat?

#110

Post by gumby »

GordonS wrote: post #90
gumby wrote: post #26

Our household rule was "if you put it on your plate you had to finish it; if someone else put it on your plate you don't have to" (with some parental modulation such as "yes you are having some of these Brussels sprouts" or "finish the beans before you go for seconds"). Parents don't like to see food wasted (it took money to buy and time to prepare and the alternatives aren't good for kids) but these rules were also…

Do you think this could discourage kids from trying new foods, or does that come under "parental modulation", such that if you try it and don't like it, you don't have to eat it?

I think the idea that some foods should be avoided is learned from parents anyway. I’ve only ever seen it in the US.
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