Live data from Hacker News

The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

datadating.tacticaltech.org

31–40 of 124 posts

Re: The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

#31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I met all my girlfriends including my wife in nightclubs. I didn't even like nightclubs but wanted to meet women. This probably sounds as quaint as arranged marriages nowadays.

I met my wife when she asked me how to get out of vi. She was a new PhD student, and I was the departmental sysadmin. To be fair to her, she knew vi just fine, but we had these messed up DEC keyboards with no ESC, where ESC was mapped to F11.

One more reason never to use Emacs!

Re: The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

#32

Speaking of LTV, the power users in online dating can easily be worth several hundred a month. Super swipes and super likes are about $1 each these days and in crowded dating markets you have to rely on them heavily if you're hoping to cut through the noise of everybody else's profiles. I'm actually surprised Tinder and co haven't started selling an option to bid money to have your profile be seen first in your city.…

Swipes are based on elo and attractiveness proximity. This is probably a much better user experience than uglies paying to boost their rank. If you see only attractive people then congratulations.

Re: The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

#33

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I met all my girlfriends including my wife in nightclubs. I didn't even like nightclubs but wanted to meet women. This probably sounds as quaint as arranged marriages nowadays.

I met my wife when she asked me how to get out of vi. She was a new PhD student, and I was the departmental sysadmin. To be fair to her, she knew vi just fine, but we had these messed up DEC keyboards with no ESC, where ESC was mapped to F11.

Classic and important question. By some rights, stack overflow is a site designed to help people escape vim, and fills time between users getting trapped with off topic conversations about programming:

https://stackoverflow.blog/2017/05/23/stack-overflow-helping...

Glad it wasn't the answer in your case, of course. :)

Re: The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

#34
post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I met my wife when she asked me how to get out of vi. She was a new PhD student, and I was the departmental sysadmin. To be fair to her, she knew vi just fine, but we had these messed up DEC keyboards with no ESC, where ESC was mapped to F11.

One more reason never to use Emacs!

This was a vi problem; Emacs mainly uses escape for when your keyboard doesn’t have a meta key, which most did by the 1980s

Re: The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

#36
post #34
post #31

Earlier quoted context omitted.

One more reason never to use Emacs!

This was a vi problem; Emacs mainly uses escape for when your keyboard doesn’t have a meta key, which most did by the 1980s

I’m implying that it’s one more data point that you’re more likely to meet your soul mate if you use vi vs emacs.

Re: The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

#37
post #25

Earlier quoted context omitted.

The best solution here is to simply not use Tinder. It's just a waste of time. CMB and Bumble are far better and have much better people. Tinder just seems to have some ultra-attractive and probably fake profiles for their "daily curated matches", and then a bunch of extremely undesirable people who haven't figured out that everyone's moved on from Tinder to better services.

While I agree that the apparent profile quality seems better on Bumble, I get an order of magnitude fewer matches through that service. My bet is Tinder became the de facto dating app (and has taken on the generic name for dating apps), which brings the bots and the abuse. The bots will follow the community if it leaves Tinder.

This has been my experience as well. Although there's some sort of strange seasonality to it. I can go a couple of months with barely any matches on Bumble, followed by a few weeks of matching with everybody and their cousin. Can't tell if it's single people feeling bad for not bringing anybody back home for Christmas or simply Bumble messing around with their ELO rankings of users behind the scenes.

Re: The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

#38

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I met all my girlfriends including my wife in nightclubs. I didn't even like nightclubs but wanted to meet women. This probably sounds as quaint as arranged marriages nowadays.

I've done the whole bars and night clubs thing pretty actively in my mid to late 20s. My issue has always been that your ability to be selective in that kind of environment only extends to the looks. Also I don't drink and have a very consistent sleeping schedule, so prowling bars for women until 3 in the morning has lost a lot of its appeal when I spend the rest of the weekend feeling like shit. Online you get to le…

Unfortunately people don't actually put more info or good pictures. 20-30% of profiles say nothing. Just pictures. In Japan where the Japanese culturally hate putting up pictures of themselves online around 10-15% of profiles don't even have a picture of themselves. (on FB where the goal is not dating it's more like 95% don't have a picture of themselves) And then 90-95% of all profiles say the same things. "I like yoga, shopping, dinning out, movies, travel".

I know this probably is somewhat less in other cultures. Certainly I seen no profiles with no picture in the USA but I still see 80% or so of profiles with no useful info in them, just generics.

Not suggesting a bar is better. I'd love to find and/or develop a better system that some how encourages better matches

Re: The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

#39

Speaking of LTV, the power users in online dating can easily be worth several hundred a month. Super swipes and super likes are about $1 each these days and in crowded dating markets you have to rely on them heavily if you're hoping to cut through the noise of everybody else's profiles. I'm actually surprised Tinder and co haven't started selling an option to bid money to have your profile be seen first in your city.…

I do not understand the bit about the noise. It's like saying it's harder to find a partner in a bigger city, because there are so many other people?

As long as the gender ratios remain similar, I don't understand how a higher amount of users results in worse dating odds. Are you referring to the paradox where the same ultra-hot 100 people get all the messages, were the site's population 100, 100k, or 100 million?

Re: The Dating Brokers: An autopsy of online love

#40

Speaking of LTV, the power users in online dating can easily be worth several hundred a month. Super swipes and super likes are about $1 each these days and in crowded dating markets you have to rely on them heavily if you're hoping to cut through the noise of everybody else's profiles. I'm actually surprised Tinder and co haven't started selling an option to bid money to have your profile be seen first in your city.…

I suspect that a lot of people would stop using Tinder if they became aware it was possible to pay to boost your "position". People don't want to think that the person they matched with got there by paying lots of cash.
Post reply on HN