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Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

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Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#81

Post by tdfx »

Buldak wrote: post #65
jlawson wrote: post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I wish people of my color, gender, or belief were allowed to make a club, or join yours. It sounds great. Maybe something like this is why whites commit suicide so much more than blacks in America (per CDC [1]). Blacks suffer in many ways but at least they're allowed to make a community just about themselves, and that's valuable. [1] https://www.realclearscience.com/journal_club/2013/04/05/us_... !

Am I reading this right, you think a plausible reason for suicide among whites is that they're not allowed to form white affinity groups?

I think OP was saying that preventing white affinity groups decreases the availability of affinity groups to white people, which can cause an increase in feelings of loneliness and thereby contribute to things like suicide that result from feelings of loneliness.

Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#82

Post by tdfx »

wtf1234 wrote: post #62
jlawson wrote: post #41

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I wish people of my color, gender, or belief were allowed to make a club, or join yours. It sounds great. Maybe something like this is why whites commit suicide so much more than blacks in America (per CDC [1]). Blacks suffer in many ways but at least they're allowed to make a community just about themselves, and that's valuable. [1] https://www.realclearscience.com/journal_club/2013/04/05/us_... !

The average software company is already a white men club. Even more so finance companies.

I'm not sure where you've worked or where you went to school, but as a white person I've infrequently been in the racial majority of my computer science classes or corporate software engineering teams. East Asia and Indian subcontinent has been far better represented than white people, especially at the larger corporations.

Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#83

Post by x220 »

40acres wrote: post #11

The average American spends too much time at work to not have some sort of social, not 100% related to work, activities and groups that they can be apart of. As a black employee I'm very plugged in the employee resource group for black employees at my organization. I've been able to give back to the local community through volunteering, develop mentee and mentor relationships through this network and develop a sense…

I'm very glad that you have found a sense of community and connection at work. Loneliness and alienation is serious, and fixing it is not easy. I do think that attending groups connected to your workplace is the wrong approach, even if it can benefit you. Perhaps people could join (or start) such groups which are oriented around professionals in an industry who share a certain background, but isn't tied to any specific company? That way if you get fired or need to switch jobs, you minimize that part of your life which is thrown into chaos.

Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#84

Post by davidmoffatt »

"Dan Schawbel wants to save you from loneliness at work." Any time you see self referential sentences like this at the beginning of an article hit the back button. It is just another schmuck selling snake oil and I call shenanigans!

If loneliness is an epidemic then show some facts. Suicide rates, are computer programmers doing it more construction works? Other kinds of engineers? Police and firemen? No they are not. (fact check www.learning-mind.com/suicide-rates-professions/)

So everyone please help out. When you see crap like this article, call shenanigans. Don't take advice from snake oil salesmen.

Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#85

Post by vharuck »

jlawson wrote: post #41
40acres wrote: post #11

The average American spends too much time at work to not have some sort of social, not 100% related to work, activities and groups that they can be apart of. As a black employee I'm very plugged in the employee resource group for black employees at my organization. I've been able to give back to the local community through volunteering, develop mentee and mentor relationships through this network and develop a sense…

I wish people of my color, gender, or belief were allowed to make a club, or join yours. It sounds great. Maybe something like this is why whites commit suicide so much more than blacks in America (per CDC [1]). Blacks suffer in many ways but at least they're allowed to make a community just about themselves, and that's valuable. [1] https://www.realclearscience.com/journal_club/2013/04/05/us_... !

"White" is so generic it's meaningless. It only helps when using skin tone to decide things, which is usually bad. There is no "white culture," but there is Irish, German, British, etc. I doubt anyone would bat an eye if you started a group focused on a European ethnicity.

Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#86

Post by [deleted] »

tdfx wrote: post #79
shawnz wrote: post #77

Earlier quoted context omitted.

But obviously you haven't faced the specific set of challenges that only apply to non-white or non-male people. That is what the parent is suggesting, that it is helpful to have support groups containing people who have faced the same sorts of challenges as you. That doesn't mean that all non-white or non-male people universally have harder lives than all white/male people.

Of course not, but the clumsy racism of the grand-grandparent poster immediately invalidated all of the otherwise good points that were made and clearly turned off a wide swath of an otherwise reasonable and receptive audience. There's quite a few politicians that could learn a great lesson from this thread.

[deleted]

Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#87

Post by PhasmaFelis »

x220 wrote: post #72
PhasmaFelis wrote: post #61

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When you've grown up facing a particular set of hardships that most of the people around you aren't familiar with, it's important for your mental health to be able to spend time with folks who get it. It doesn't mean you spend all your time together chatting about oppression, but it's easier to relax and let your guard down with someone when you know they won't lecture you for being nervous around police, or try to s…

>As a white male you haven't experienced any of that This is almost unbelievably blind.

See my edit, please.

Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#88

Post by PhasmaFelis »

maxxxxx wrote: post #75
PhasmaFelis wrote: post #61

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When you've grown up facing a particular set of hardships that most of the people around you aren't familiar with, it's important for your mental health to be able to spend time with folks who get it. It doesn't mean you spend all your time together chatting about oppression, but it's easier to relax and let your guard down with someone when you know they won't lecture you for being nervous around police, or try to s…

"As a white male you haven't experienced any of that," Not all white males are the same and face the same challenges. Life is very different if you are good looking, tall, athletic, outgoing vs. being short, non-athletic, nerdy and socially awkward. I was in the second group and faced a lot of discrimination, bullying and ridicule when I grew up. I probably had a lot of advantages too but it's not that simple. There…

Then I'm not sure why it's so strange to you that people might want to associate with folks who've grown up with the same hardship. I'm a nerdy white guy with autism; I probably went through much the same shit you did. That's why I sympathize with other minority groups. I know how much it sucks to face discrimination for something you were born with, and I want everyone who's suffered that to find welcoming support.

Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#89

Post by PhasmaFelis »

WAthrowaway wrote: post #67
PhasmaFelis wrote: post #61

Earlier quoted context omitted.

When you've grown up facing a particular set of hardships that most of the people around you aren't familiar with, it's important for your mental health to be able to spend time with folks who get it. It doesn't mean you spend all your time together chatting about oppression, but it's easier to relax and let your guard down with someone when you know they won't lecture you for being nervous around police, or try to s…

>As a white male you haven't experienced any of that, which is fine! You know absolutely nothing about this person and yet feel completely at liberty to issue blanket statements about their life and what they have experienced and how they 'should' feel. White privilege is obviously real. However, that doesn't mean that a white male hasn't ever been nervous around the police or felt queer thoughts. This is why people…

See my edit, please.

Re: Fighting the “loneliness epidemic” at work

#90

Post by [deleted] »

PhasmaFelis wrote: post #89
WAthrowaway wrote: post #67

Earlier quoted context omitted.

>As a white male you haven't experienced any of that, which is fine! You know absolutely nothing about this person and yet feel completely at liberty to issue blanket statements about their life and what they have experienced and how they 'should' feel. White privilege is obviously real. However, that doesn't mean that a white male hasn't ever been nervous around the police or felt queer thoughts. This is why people…

See my edit, please.

[deleted]
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