How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
nytimes.com
How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
1–10 of 222 posts
Re: How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
#2State mandated gf when??
Re: How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
#3It's easy to point out that this is caused by 'the internet' or 'modern technology' replacing the need for human interaction. We feel less alone but are more selective about our friends, live in smaller echo chambers.
In meatspace there's this thing where you want people to like you if you meet them, possibly enforced by the fact that someone might punch you if you rile them up. On the internet we select our own groups and then with group dynamics we try to be the 'cool kid' which results in maybe racist in-jokes or maybe in radicalization.
I really have no idea how to even begin solving this and if this has to be solved at all. It seems everyone's stance is hardening and we're drawing starker 'us vs them' lines or just aren't interested in others' plights as we can just select the small subset of people that fit with our current mindset.
Re: How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
#4Um the people in the confederate States were super neighborly and friendly. Not sure this is the cure-all recipe for avoiding antagonism between factions, or sections as they used to be called.
Re: How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
#5Nah. I despise "them" because they're pro-censorship pseudo intellectuals who largely judge policies based on percieved intentions rather than outcomes. Sometimes somebody is just wrong. Sometimes a side is just stupid or evil and it's as simple as that.
Re: How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
#6It's easy to point out that this is caused by 'the internet' or 'modern technology' replacing the need for human interaction. We feel less alone but are more selective about our friends, live in smaller echo chambers. In meatspace there's this thing where you want people to like you if you meet them, possibly enforced by the fact that someone might punch you if you rile them up. On the internet we select our own grou…
The core issue IMO is resilience to rejection and the work required for friendships.
Not everyone wants to be your friend, and it's easier to learn that from the internet, not only because of hate, but even casual twitter dunks.
When you do find someone you click with, it's work on both sides, and if both sides don't put in some work, it deteriorates.
The easy way out is a lot of shallow interactions that require little work where no one really gets to know you. Rejection doesn't sting as much because you can just go change a username.
Personally I think this article gets it wrong: people are already radicalized and seem lonely because they don't find any other radicals to hang out with. People who turn to angry politics just to fill the shallow social interaction checkbox are probably a small percentage of lonely people.
Re: How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
#7It's easy to point out that this is caused by 'the internet' or 'modern technology' replacing the need for human interaction. We feel less alone but are more selective about our friends, live in smaller echo chambers. In meatspace there's this thing where you want people to like you if you meet them, possibly enforced by the fact that someone might punch you if you rile them up. On the internet we select our own grou…
Let me play devil's advocate for a moment:
Is there any hard data that proves that people are becoming increasingly tribal?
Perhaps the number of radicals is the same like it was 20 years ago, but the internet and social media now give those radicals a voice. Because of this it feels like we are becoming increasingly tribal, when in reality we're not.
Similar to how the crime rates are going down, but most folks think that it's getting worse.
For us who spend a large portion of our time on internet, it certainly feels like everything is crashing down.
Re: How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
#8It's easy to point out that this is caused by 'the internet' or 'modern technology' replacing the need for human interaction. We feel less alone but are more selective about our friends, live in smaller echo chambers. In meatspace there's this thing where you want people to like you if you meet them, possibly enforced by the fact that someone might punch you if you rile them up. On the internet we select our own grou…
In meat space, where are the places to meet? Where are the weekly town celebrations, or the courtyard everyone retires to? Everything is locked up by money.
Re: How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
#9There is a good reason why people are escaping small towns. If you are even a little bit outside of the mold, such as being into reading instead of cars as a guy, you will be ostracized by a huge part of the community. And may God have mercy on you if you are into the really weird stuff, such as liking programming, tinkering with electronics or anime.
Re: How Loneliness Is Tearing America Apart
#10Um the people in the confederate States were super neighborly and friendly. Not sure this is the cure-all recipe for avoiding antagonism between factions, or sections as they used to be called.
I am not sure what this has to do with loneliness. And I am not sure why you feel the need to emphasize "Confederate States" when it has a name: Southern Courtesy. Having growing up in the region and both given and received Southern Courtesy, it's more about community building and less about breaking out of loneliness.
When a bunch of Yankees moved into town during my childhood, they also were quite friendly but just in a different way. They're people too and I find the whole distinction rather silly anyways. Both groups have their nice folks and both have their mean folks.
Also it's perfectly fine to be alone, as it doesn't mean you have to be lonely.