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The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

ifstudies.org

21–30 of 44 posts

Re: The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

#21
post #10

Wow. Not a word about the man's number of sexual partners in the marriages that stayed together or divorced. On the other hand, it's apparently very interesting if the woman is a virgin or not when married.

From the article: unfortunately, the NSFG doesn’t have full data on men’s premarital sexual behavior, and in any event they recall their own marital histories less reliably than do women

> unfortunately, the NSFG doesn’t have full data on men’s premarital sexual behavior, and in any event they recall their own marital histories less reliably than do women

How was this validated? It seems the groups surveyed during each period were completely different, so they were just asking people if they remembered how many people they'd had sex with. That doesn't seem like methodology that would produce very accurate data, so I'd be skeptical of reading too much into this.

You might expect that people would be able to remember basic things and give consistent answers to questions like whether they've ever used marijuana or had sex or been the victim of a violent crime, but in reality people's answers might as well depend on what they had for breakfast that day.

Re: The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

#22

The odds of divorce are lowest with zero or one premarital partners. Makes sense to me. Those people are either the least interested in pursuing sexual relationships solely for pleasure or the least able to do so, so might feel more compelled to stick with a marriage that isn't 100% as they either won't be doing it for sex or might feel unable to find someone else. However, I think the more interesting thing to resea…

How do you explain then the increase of premarital sexual encounters over time?

Re: The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

#23
At university I took a class about this sort of stuff and one of the eye opening things was the studies about how the couples with the best sex life were actually old, married, religious couples. If you want great sex, then going to church and having a lifelong, selfless, loving commitment to your partner seems to help a lot; but that sure makes sense anyways...

There are a lot of studies about how pornography and such also makes it hard to have healthy, connected relationships. Church-going folks probably avoid quite a bit of those pitfalls as well, which helps in the longrun.

Also, if anyone is looking for world class research on family/couple stuff, Gottman institute is awesome: https://www.gottman.com/

Re: The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

#24
post #15

Why does the article's title say this is "counter-intuitive"? If anything, it seems completely intuitive to me; promiscuous people, regardless of sex, are most likely to cheat and not want to stay married.

Because 2018 sexual dogma is quite firm on the position that "N count" is entirely irrelevant when selecting a partner and that you are either a pig, a slut-shamer, or a misogynist bigot for even inquiring.

Any evidence that "N count" is, in fact, relevant would be regarded by modern sociologists as counterintuitive.

Re: The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

#25
post #15

Why does the article's title say this is "counter-intuitive"? If anything, it seems completely intuitive to me; promiscuous people, regardless of sex, are most likely to cheat and not want to stay married.

I can only assume it's because of the "have fun first, settle down later" mindset many people tend to have with regards to sex and relationships. I agree, though, it's not a great title.

Re: The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

#26
post #7

Great research, next up, a more granular look: what specific types of sex increase stability the most? Oral? Anal? Role play? "Honey we need to purchase this anal training kit with matching strap on. For the marriage . I read it on Hacker News!"

The best type of sex to have a stable marriage is the loving, selfless type where you are actively trying to promote the well-being and happiness of your partner. That sort comes from a relationship where you are actively trying to promote the happiness and interests of your partner in all parts of your relationship, which is the most stable anyways.

Re: The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

#27
This guy mentions and then dismisses without rationale the idea that women who have ten partners might have other life experiences that make them less likely to stay married. He doesn't even consider the notion that a woman who has zero partners is damaged in ways that make her unable to leave a bad relationship.

That he is does not even mention the effects of the man's sexuality (or the nature of a man who would choose a virgin or a woman who had ten or more partners) tells me that this is polemic.

This IFS is a conservative organization working to convince us that 'traditional' families are the bedrock of society. This article is manipulation.

Re: The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

#28
post #15

Why does the article's title say this is "counter-intuitive"? If anything, it seems completely intuitive to me; promiscuous people, regardless of sex, are most likely to cheat and not want to stay married.

You should read the article. The interesting parts involve a discrepancy observed for people with two premarital partners in particular.

Re: The link between premarital sex and marriage stability

#30
post #27

This guy mentions and then dismisses without rationale the idea that women who have ten partners might have other life experiences that make them less likely to stay married. He doesn't even consider the notion that a woman who has zero partners is damaged in ways that make her unable to leave a bad relationship. That he is does not even mention the effects of the man's sexuality (or the nature of a man who would cho…

Keep stuff like this in mind when reading all social science papers. In softer sciences the bias of the researchers seems to have a very strong effect on the outcome.
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