When the baby is born someone does an execve on you. You inherit your original PID but everything else is replaced. There is no way back to the original process, but you keep open file descriptors to your close friends. Friends without children were likely marked close on exec.
Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
121–130 of 216 posts
Re: Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
#122Earlier quoted context omitted.
* Seriously consider having the baby sleep in your bed with you, especially if you/your spouse are breastfeeding. In my experience this leads to drastically less sleep. You disturb your baby and your baby disturbs you. We put the baby in another room and invested in a baby alarm. * Seriously consider breastfeeding. Yes, but don't pressure yourself too much...the most important thing is that the baby eats properly. Bo…
Why is it a "critical advantage" to measure how much the baby eats? Babies need to eat when they're hungry and they stop when their stomach is full.
I was going to ask the same question. Not once have a thought "my daughter is eating too much."
Politics, nutrition and parenting are all conversations I attempt to avoid, and this combines 2 of 3 topics. :/
Re: Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
#123This is our first child and we had it all planned out. Well, either the plan was ill-conceived or just poorly executed because nothing has gone as planned.
Example: We adopted across racial lines. We are now a multi-racial family and I thought, why not have a buddy of mine set up a website where I can document my experiences as a father of a child that does not look like me. Thought it might be useful information for some people as well as a place for the birth mother to look in on from time to time if she chose to. The site is up, but there is nothing posted because I have not had time to learn to use it.
....just one of many.
Re: Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
#124I've a 2 year old son. A lot of comments about sleeplessness and being on call 24/7 stop applying after a few months, when a baby sleeps through the night. I find I have less time in front of the computer, but more motivation and inspiration while I'm there. I still have plenty of energy and time to create interesting projects ( http://yieldthought.com/post/1345897970/10-flaws-that-made-m... ). I had more time before…
"after a few months, when a baby sleep through the night" You mean when _your_ baby sleeps through the night - mine didn't until 12-14 months or so :)
s/a few/20/
Re: Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
#125I'll try to answer your questions directly and avoid the temptation of giving advice or writing about how awesome fatherhood is. For context, I have a 4 month old baby girl, a full time corporate software job and I just started my "project" two months ago...
>So does having a baby give you inspiration and ability to do more?
More inspiration and more motivation but almost no time to implement. The odd thing is that I'm actually getting more stuff done now than before, but I have to admit the bar wasn't set very high. I always knew I was wasting time before but it felt like I had plenty to waste.
Since her birth, free time is measured in minutes so I have to make them all count. On the other hand I've had opportunities for thinking while my hands have been full, so when even the shortest window opens I know exactly what needs doing first.
I keep taking inspiration from patio11 (see http://www.kalzumeus.com/2010/03/20/running-a-software-busin... ). If I get 5 hours done it's been a good week, but it's a lot more productive than I would have thought.
>Or you are so exhausted that everything else seems uninteresting?
Exhausted yes, but in a different way to how I imagined it - it's not totally debilitating. I'm still very interested in too many things (some new).
>How does having a baby change your life?
I realised how important family is and how much they depend on me. I spend less time at work and stress less about it. I now try to be fresh and cheerful when I get home even if I don't feel it.
I care even less what other people think. I spend less time lurking in forums. I've finally got off my arse and made actual progress. I've got lower expectations.
I also have baby spit on all my collars, bags under my eyes and occasional unwarranted grumpy outbursts. But it's all good.
Re: Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
#126Life's priorities certainly change. Before I had a baby, it was all about my intellectual pursuits. Now my focus is on how to be a better father. I used to be a big gamer. I sold my gaming system and try to no longer use the computer after I get home from work. Needless to say, this is a huge priority shift and is very fulfilling. I am less inspired to pursue risky dreams, but more inspired to plan for long term financial success. It is exhausting to come home after a long day and be Dad, get on their level and focus on them, but at the same time I have a new found energy that I never had before.
(Father of a 20 month old girl and expecting another this December.)
Re: Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
#127There's a two- or three-week period, usually around the six month mark, when your baby can sit up unaided but can't yet crawl. During this time, you can put the baby down on an activity blanket (supervised, obviously) and enjoy maybe five or ten minute contiguous stretches of uninterrupted time to do stuff. Note: activities like preparing a meal and straightening up the place tend to take priority over developing a s…
Everyone we know who used "attachment" techniques around bedtime had long-term issues with their childrens' sleeping habits. We let both our girls (now 1 & 3) "cry it out." It was quite hard for a couple of weeks, but they both now have very good sleeping schedules. And, as far as I can tell, no psychological damage! Sleep with your baby if you find it emotionally gratifying, but I'm skeptical that there's any signif…
I have the exact opposite experience; everyone who didn't use attachment has screaming wrecks at ~2 years and we're getting sleeping through the night. Sample size roughly five children, utterly unrandomly chosen.
Hooray anecdotes!
Re: Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
#128Earlier quoted context omitted.
* Seriously consider having the baby sleep in your bed with you, especially if you/your spouse are breastfeeding. In my experience this leads to drastically less sleep. You disturb your baby and your baby disturbs you. We put the baby in another room and invested in a baby alarm. * Seriously consider breastfeeding. Yes, but don't pressure yourself too much...the most important thing is that the baby eats properly. Bo…
Why is it a "critical advantage" to measure how much the baby eats? Babies need to eat when they're hungry and they stop when their stomach is full.
For the vast majority of parents, it doesn't matter. If you're worried about it, invest in a baby scale and weigh regularly (keep in mind that babies lose weight immediately after birth, though.) Doctors can give you a chart for normal weight gain.
For a minority of parents, the child will be "failure to thrive" and for that you will need to measure intake, but the child will also be on special high calorie formula anyway. So at this point the advantage is irrelevant.
"Measuring" is a really stupid reason to deny your kid the other benefits of breast feeding. However, there are many viable reasons not to breastfeed, such as it's just not working, or the mother needs to work/have a life, or it's painful, etc.
Re: Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
#129There's a two- or three-week period, usually around the six month mark, when your baby can sit up unaided but can't yet crawl. During this time, you can put the baby down on an activity blanket (supervised, obviously) and enjoy maybe five or ten minute contiguous stretches of uninterrupted time to do stuff. Note: activities like preparing a meal and straightening up the place tend to take priority over developing a s…
> Seriously consider having the baby sleep in your bed with you, especially if you/your spouse are breastfeeding.
No. Everybody gets less sleep and for small babies there's a serious risk of death.
Re: Ask HN: How does having a baby change your life?
#130I have a 2.5 year old daughter, and I've found that once we got past the sleepless nights phase, I became more productive on my side projects than I was before she was born.
I have dramatically less free time to work on them, but out of necessity I've become much more focused and disciplined about how I use it (no more tv, aimless web surfing, etc.). The net effect is that I'm getting a lot more done. Meanwhile, my single friends are complaining that they don't have any free time for side projects. Hah.