Earlier quoted context omitted.
While it has many unfortunate effects in society, the ability to make up your mind about something/someone in a split second is actually a survival mechanism.
It's very rare that I run in to a situation where the initial impression is accurate. How's such an inaccurate metric supposed to be a life saver?
The Crazy Lady Speaks
31–40 of 43 posts
Re: The Crazy Lady Speaks
#32Earlier quoted context omitted.
While it has many unfortunate effects in society, the ability to make up your mind about something/someone in a split second is actually a survival mechanism.
It's very rare that I run in to a situation where the initial impression is accurate. How's such an inaccurate metric supposed to be a life saver?
The same mechanism still exists in today's humans. Fortunately many of us are not in situations where our immediate survival is at stake. The mechanism is still there though, it just takes different forms, like having an opinion about people or things in a split second, based on what you perceive at that moment. (The reaction is likely to be different too, not fight-or-flight like in nature.) As you point out, it's often wrong, so it's much less useful to us than it used to be (although not completely useless).
Re: The Crazy Lady Speaks
#33Earlier quoted context omitted.
UK people are much of a muchness. Americans run a full-spectrum I suspect in the UK you've unconsciously constructed an echo chamber around yourself, it's easy to do, especially in London where you can easily fall into a demographic/subculture and never interact with anyone else. Whereas when traveling you are out of your "comfort zone" and interact with a greater range of people. People are people, and the UK has a…
Don't you think that most people from western countries would be shocked when an acquaintance casually mentions that he should have brought a gun in case he needs to shoot a criminal?
Re: The Crazy Lady Speaks
#34Earlier quoted context omitted.
UK people are much of a muchness. Americans run a full-spectrum I suspect in the UK you've unconsciously constructed an echo chamber around yourself, it's easy to do, especially in London where you can easily fall into a demographic/subculture and never interact with anyone else. Whereas when traveling you are out of your "comfort zone" and interact with a greater range of people. People are people, and the UK has a…
Don't you think that most people from western countries would be shocked when an acquaintance casually mentions that he should have brought a gun in case he needs to shoot a criminal?
But to be shocked by that in America seems to show a rather high degree of cultural illiteracy.
Re: The Crazy Lady Speaks
#35Earlier quoted context omitted.
Sadly there's also the opposite side. I always try to talk to homeless people begging in the street, getting their attention by giving them a small amount of money. A few weeks ago I came to talk to this girl coming from a different country who was just visiting friends in mine. I was looking for that special spark you found in your acquaintance but I simply couldn't find it. After about 20 minutes I had to admit tha…
You saw what she chose to show you.
Re: The Crazy Lady Speaks
#36What's crazy is thinking that someone necessarily agrees with the contents of a book she's reading.
Re: The Crazy Lady Speaks
#37You can have the same experience when it goes the other way: someone who is a good friend ends up with a startling revelation that makes your jaw drop. My case in point was this week: I was hanging out with an academic friend of mine at a conference. He lives somewhat far away, and when I do roll through town, we usually just grab a beer rather than see his house. This week, however, he revealed something that hither…
No, the real trick is to use this new experience to reexamine your beliefs and assumptions to see if they need updating.
Re: The Crazy Lady Speaks
#38Re: The Crazy Lady Speaks
#39Re: The Crazy Lady Speaks
#40Earlier quoted context omitted.
You saw what she chose to show you.
Ockham's Razor: is the stupid homeless woman (a) stupid or (b) an evil genius who is pretending to be stupid for some unknown reason?
She's a homeless woman, so she was perhaps raised by a demanding and misogynistic father figure, from whom she learned to act helpless. Then she figured out in high school that acting dumb makes boys like her. She sort of fell into the identity because it was easy -- her family, friends, and society at large fully expected her to be a dumb slut, so it was easy, even for her, to believe she was, plus she liked the attention.
That's a pretty common thread, and people are WAY more complicated than that. I've found people have rich and varied experiences, even dumb ones. That you couldn't glean anything from this girl other than that she was "stupid" maybe says more about you than about her. She has thoughts and feelings that maybe she either can't express in a way you understand, or that she doesn't care to express to someone who is clearly an outsider.
I'm just saying that people surprise me, and I have a hard time believing some girl is just irredeemably "stupid" and that's all there is to know about her.
There are plenty of people who think I'm whatever they think