Ask HN: First month job anxiety. Am I actually an impostor?

Well, if it makes you feel any better: I’ve been doing this for 25 years, and I still feel like the expectations placed on me are far above my capabilities - but they’re also far above the capabilities of anybody I’ve ever worked with. They’ll always try to demand more out of you than you or anybody else can possibly deliver, and be genuinely disappointed when you can’t work miracles all day, every day. Just do the best work you can do, knowing that you’re doing the best work you can do, and you’ll get a little better every day.

I have went through multiple rounds of this in different roles. I think most have. There are already great practical comments here on how to approach it for your specific case. It takes awhile, but if you just keep chipping away at the things your finding difficult and you will start to settle in.

> Everyone around me is always on point though many of them are younger than me. Their thoughts are completely clear. I rarely hear them make mistakes or misunderstand anything: they seem to have no weaknesses.

Keep an eye out on this longer term. Ive been truly amazed by how quick people were in the past only to realise later they were skilled at communication and not the subject they were working on. "Knowing the right answer to give" vs "knowing the right answer". And if the person is very smart it takes a while for this to become apparent.

i would also suggest specifically to look into ampakines if you're going to go the nootropic route. nothing ive ever taken beats IDRA-21 in terms of destroying the barrier to knowledge acquisition and fluidity. I hear prl-8-53 also works well in that regard, but I haven't tried it. other than that the only other nootropic i can vouch for is memantine but some people might question the nootropic potential of that when you take doses large enough to be ensconced on a dissociative euphoria :^). still everyone I've talked to that uses it in more restrictive dosing regimens confirms that it works pretty well for nootropic and cognitive benefit.

i can't exactly tell you what to do because I personally suffer from the same problem in essentially every corporate endeavor i seek. however, that being said, i can give you a lot of things not to do:

-don't not admit that you're overwhelmed when you are. if you keep it inside it'll just compound your feelings.

-if you don't know what to do, don't just not do anything or waste your time on social media. bite the bullet and ask someone.

-don't ever discourage the way you feel entirely. that sense of shame and anxiety does serve a purpose: it motivates you to want to change. for me, i just took it for granted and assumed it couldn't be changed.

-don't actively hide from seeking feedback from your higher ups. if you're that worried about your progress and your contributions, then it only makes sense to seek further information.

-beyond that, don't hide from seeking feedback from fellow employees. they've been there longer than you chances are and they're a lot easier to approach than a supervisor or a boss because it's easy to convince yourself that everything is on the line if you admit to the person who hired you that you're struggling to integrate. the point is: find someone you're comfortable opening up to and do it.

i managed to ride a wonderful job as a software developer for cpanel into the ground after only three months because I just couldn't let myself integrate (not to mention that was the midge of my severe drug addiction period so that also contributed to my downfall). i know how you feel now may suck but it'll be infinitely worse if you let it define you and become the reason you no longer have a job. you clearly have some potential to do it otherwise you wouldn't be there. all you have to do is accept that and understand that growing pains are natural. u got this :^)

hey thanks for the suggestions ill have to try a few of those stacks later when I have the money to. I've been meaning to experiment with a racetam as well as adrafinil (or more realistically modafinil if I could acquire it directly.)

those doses of memantine seem a lot more realistic than what I would do, namely taking 150-200mg daily. but I wasn't doing it for the nootropic benefit. i was doing it for the sake of the nmda antagonism. granted i still found nootropic benefit even in those extreme doses but i think my experience is very atypical as I tend to feel more functional and alert when I am experience a period of marked nmda antagonism. may just be confirmation bias or something like that but it seems the only time recently in my life I've been able to make something of myself and do what's necessary is when I have those doses of memantine.