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Why I eat alone and probably you should too

planetunknown.blogspot.com

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Re: Why I eat alone and probably you should too

#31

Post by benwerd »

maukdaddy wrote: post #22

This is absolutely terrible advice. Lunch is the ideal opportunity to expand your social network, make connections, learn from others, etc. It is by definition a small-ish block of time and if you're not feeling particularly talkative you can just concentrate on your food. Getting to know colleagues from different parts of the business will greatly expand future career opportunities. Lunch is the best way to do this,…

Seconded. Not only that, but the point about topics not being interesting floored me. There's a serendipity in conversation that you rarely get from other places; you're exposed to things you might never find out about otherwise. I'd far rather be a well-rounded person than a single-minded one with a narrow focus. And conversely, I'd rather spend time with that kind of person, too.

Simply put, the author doesn't seem to put much value in other people. That's not something I can get behind.

Re: Why I eat alone and probably you should too

#32

Post by benwerd »

superjared wrote: post #16

This guy must have boring coworkers. Seriously, because when I go to lunch with my colleagues we talk about work or related things and it's almost always productive. We either walk away with a more knowledge or a decision to a hard problem.

I totally don't get why talking about topics beyond work isn't valuable. Okay, maybe not in an immediate how-will-I-solve-these-problems sense, but in terms of networking, emotional well-being, knowledge about the world and interpersonal skills / relationships, it's vital (as well as being kind of fun). Thinking long-term, being social is the way to go.

Re: Why I eat alone and probably you should too

#33

Post by TGJ »

Timmy_C wrote: post #25

I feel like this article and others which mention Tim Ferris start with a premise that isn't true for all people. They assume that 100% of our time is our own and we are free to use it as we choose. For myself, I find that large portions of my time belong to someone else; my family, my job, my church. And once I carve out that time for others I am often left with only a couple hours here or there. And it seems labori…

This guy I think is coming from the angle that if the time with others is not beneficial to you, then there are better ways to spend that time.

I think if you look at what you think is your other times, you'll find that those times have benefits for you and as such belong to you. If you think those times belong to someone else, you are living your life in the wrong way. This is what I think he meant.

Re: Why I eat alone and probably you should too

#34

Post by TGJ »

maukdaddy wrote: post #22

This is absolutely terrible advice. Lunch is the ideal opportunity to expand your social network, make connections, learn from others, etc. It is by definition a small-ish block of time and if you're not feeling particularly talkative you can just concentrate on your food. Getting to know colleagues from different parts of the business will greatly expand future career opportunities. Lunch is the best way to do this,…

On the other hand, if you are not worried about social connections and want to find extra time in the day to do what you want after your job, then this advice is good.

You want to connect with people so you are finding the extra time. This guy wants to do his projects so he wants to minimize social hours.

You are completely ignoring his objective because you are so focused on yours.

Re: Why I eat alone and probably you should too

#36

Post by stevenp »

The point of the article is not only about eating alone. It's about realizing that you probably have lots of small blocks of idle, wasted time during the day: Walking around and talking to co-workers, taking too long to get ready in the morning because you're distracted, etc.

To me, this emphasizes something that I realized at Startup School. This difference between those who find time to make something and those who don't is that the ones who really want it find the time, even if they have a day job, because they simply want it more.

Bravo, great post.

Re: Why I eat alone and probably you should too

#37

Post by maukdaddy »

TGJ wrote: post #34
maukdaddy wrote: post #22

This is absolutely terrible advice. Lunch is the ideal opportunity to expand your social network, make connections, learn from others, etc. It is by definition a small-ish block of time and if you're not feeling particularly talkative you can just concentrate on your food. Getting to know colleagues from different parts of the business will greatly expand future career opportunities. Lunch is the best way to do this,…

On the other hand, if you are not worried about social connections and want to find extra time in the day to do what you want after your job, then this advice is good. You want to connect with people so you are finding the extra time. This guy wants to do his projects so he wants to minimize social hours. You are completely ignoring his objective because you are so focused on yours.

One day that guy is going to get laid off, and if his side projects aren't successful, he's going to really wish he had a bigger professional network for job opportunities.

Re: Why I eat alone and probably you should too

#38

Post by djb_hackernews »

maukdaddy wrote: post #37
TGJ wrote: post #34

Earlier quoted context omitted.

On the other hand, if you are not worried about social connections and want to find extra time in the day to do what you want after your job, then this advice is good. You want to connect with people so you are finding the extra time. This guy wants to do his projects so he wants to minimize social hours. You are completely ignoring his objective because you are so focused on yours.

One day that guy is going to get laid off, and if his side projects aren't successful, he's going to really wish he had a bigger professional network for job opportunities.

One day that guy is going to get laid off, and if his professional social network fails him, he's going to to really wish he spent more time turning his side projects in to successes.

Re: Why I eat alone and probably you should too

#39

Post by zavulon »

In a few years at HN, this is close to the worst advice I have ever read.

I don't want to question the author's honesty when he's saying he's not a anti-social geek who never talks to other people, even though sometimes we're all oblivious to how we look to the world.

But if you follow that advice, you're going to be in real danger of turning into one.

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