Yeah, private tutoring is the best. The custom, just-in-time curriculum that a tutor can prepare is the most efficient way to learn. I think equally important is the transmission of a relaxed, exploratory attitude towards the STEM subjects. When a learner sees their teacher take on positive attitudes towards complexity, they too develop this attitude and can go on to solve problems on their own. Unfortunately, this t…
However, I wanted to pick up a couple of your examples - "parent touching math for the first time in 20 years" can also often be a great way for students to learn!
Adults are usually able to figure their way around a subject and this is a great learning point for kids - that you don't have to know everything, if you know how to find out about it.
Any parent has got through undergraduate education in any subject (and many who haven't) - who have learned how to learn - can find out what they need to know by looking it up and finding resources that help their comprehension. Being stressed about it is a different situation, and of course I agree with you there.
I also do sometimes say "This is stupid shit you have to know for the course" - because many courses contain bad content - but I will follow it up with "if we have time, it will be more practical to think about..." That also isn't a bad thing necessarily.
It's important for students' development to critically analyse why they are doing a particular course - if they're doing it to pass, then they should first pass.