Thank you HN • Hacker News Board

Re: Thank you HN

#21

Post by throwAwayXYZ69 » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 8:08 PM UTC

durbatuluk wrote: post #16

Congrats, I'm your old one at the moment. I'm a bit more desperate because my wife is pregnant. Happy father's day to me I guess

Best of luck man!

I'm in no position to be giving life advice, but for what it's worth:

Hang in there, do what needs to be done and be pragmatic. One day you'll look back and it will all make sense.

Re: Thank you HN

#22

Post by gfodor » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 8:09 PM UTC

> Overall, I'm not exactly where I want to be, but -for once- I can see myself getting there.

Belief in humanity's eternal capacity for self improvement, collectively, individually, and in ones own self lies at the heart of living a good, rewarding, and just life. It's becoming increasingly rare. Good luck to you!

Re: Thank you HN

#23

Post by CodeWriter23 » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 8:11 PM UTC

Thanks for sharing your story of strength and perseverance. I’m sure it will bring hope to others who may be in despair.

I want to add to this conversation, I found my own personal experience with depression was intertwined with anger and rage. Once I started addressing the anger and rage, my depression was significantly reduced.

Re: Thank you HN

#24

Post by CodeWriter23 » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 8:14 PM UTC

durbatuluk wrote: post #16

Congrats, I'm your old one at the moment. I'm a bit more desperate because my wife is pregnant. Happy father's day to me I guess

Showing up and being present is about 80% of the battle of being a great dad. You can hack the other 30%. At least that was my experience. Smell that baby’s hair when (s)he is new. The pheromones will bond you and engage you in being an awesome dad. You might also want to come up with a womb song and sing it regularly. I chose “You are my sunshine”. It still calms my DD at 9 years old.

Re: Thank you HN

#25

Post by sbmthakur » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 8:17 PM UTC

Good to read this! If will be great if you could write a blog detailing your journey. I am especially interested in the improvement of your health. Depression has claimed many lives and I think your story could help some people.

Re: Thank you HN

#26

Post by xrd » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 8:26 PM UTC

CodeWriter23 wrote: post #24

durbatuluk wrote: post #16

Congrats, I'm your old one at the moment. I'm a bit more desperate because my wife is pregnant. Happy father's day to me I guess

Showing up and being present is about 80% of the battle of being a great dad. You can hack the other 30%. At least that was my experience. Smell that baby’s hair when (s)he is new. The pheromones will bond you and engage you in being an awesome dad. You might also want to come up with a womb song and sing it regularly. I chose “You are my sunshine”. It still calms my DD at 9 years old.

It's worth listening to this advice. Having kids is really hard. And rewarding. And leads to hard changes in your life that you might not have taken on otherwise but in the end are often good changes. Forgive yourself and your fears as often as you can.

Re: Thank you HN

#27

Post by fisherjeff » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 8:33 PM UTC

I find it increasingly difficult to relate to the optimism and idealism of the early Web – the use of it to amplify some of humanity’s worst impulses can be devastating. Fortunately, stories like this one make it possible to catch a little glimmer of that magic and it’s... exhilarating.

Congratulations, and I wish you all the best, and that you may serve as an inspiration to others.

Re: Thank you HN

#28

Post by throwaway874 » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 8:41 PM UTC

CodeWriter23 wrote: post #23

Thanks for sharing your story of strength and perseverance. I’m sure it will bring hope to others who may be in despair. I want to add to this conversation, I found my own personal experience with depression was intertwined with anger and rage. Once I started addressing the anger and rage, my depression was significantly reduced.

I'm curious, how did you address the anger and rage?

Re: Thank you HN

#29

Post by ransom1538 » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 8:41 PM UTC

Get some (of life). No one escapes alive.

Re: Thank you HN

#30

Post by tehlike » Sun, Aug 12, 2018, 9:08 PM UTC

I am not sure if you'd consider a life change, but if you are interested in moving to US, please also try that. Pay is better here, and life is probably better too. Being among like-minded people would help you reach where you want to be.