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The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

theguardian.com

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Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#91

Post by aeorgnoieang »

SpouseThrowaway wrote: post #68
classichasclass wrote: post #59

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That's really hard to cope with and a big burden on you, particularly, especially since you see it leaking over to your child. When you mention the hostility, what kind of things were said? How does your spouse justify their behaviour? It sounds like there are attributes both of OCD and OCPD, and that makes for a very tough combination.

I defiantly learned over the years that my approach might have lead to more of these issues. Applying logic to each instance as resulted in the opposite effect and opened new doors in terms of what dirty versus clean is. My spouse has a tendency to push back against things they might be told. For example, if somebody told them they were gaining weight, they would eat more. Being somebody who struggles with a hot temp…

> raw chicken, diapers, feces, shoes in the house

That last one isn't like the others! You could almost certainly safely lick the bottom of your shoes (assuming you hadn't just literally stepped in shit).

Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#92

Post by shawabawa3 »

stephengillie wrote: post #75
djhworld wrote: post #19

I have OCD, although it's not crippling. My triggers tend to flare up most at night before I go to bed, or in the morning when I leave for work. Did I checked the hob is off, is the fridge closed, did I lock the door? Did I close the windows? What if I left the iron on and it falls over and starts a fire the house burns down with me inside it? It's amazing how the mind can "catastrophize" mundane situations. I live a…

What is a "hob"? https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/hob Definition of hob 1 dialectal, England : hobgoblin, elf 2 : mischief, trouble —used with play and raise always raising hob But your context describes some sort of appliance.

It's British English:

"Hob: the flat top part of a cooker, with hotplates or burners."

Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#93

Post by glenneroo »

pugworthy wrote: post #87

Mine is earthquakes and tsunamis. I live in Oregon, where we are due for a big one "some day", and I grew up on the Oregon coast, where there historically have been major inundations in some areas. Every time I drive 101 on the coast, I'm constantly scanning and planning what driveway or what side road I'd go up to get away from a tsunami. "I could turn around and go back to that one road - oh wait here's a new one.…

Do you commute a long way? Is it possible that it's just your mind keeping busy/creative while you commute? I find my mind playing out similar doomsday scenarios and solutions when I'm doing something repetitive for longer periods of time.

Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#94

Post by zhte415 »

56chan4 wrote: post #22
bpizzi wrote: post #4

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Thanks for sharing. The complexities of the human brain will never cease to amaze me. There should be a way, in all this neuronal maze, to escape those compulsions, but I bet it's really well hidden.

I would want to measure dietary Taurine levels in the body for a start. Experiments consuming 3g/day have shown no side effects, but your main source is limited to energy drinks so you have to contend with caffeine, and Taurine does not last long in the body (can start to be expelled in urine within 10mins), much like many of the water soluble chemicals classed as vitamins or minerals. Cooking actually destroys it fr…

If Taurine doesn't last long in the body yet has these wonderful effects, could you provide references?

Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#95

Post by pugworthy »

glenneroo wrote: post #93
pugworthy wrote: post #87

Mine is earthquakes and tsunamis. I live in Oregon, where we are due for a big one "some day", and I grew up on the Oregon coast, where there historically have been major inundations in some areas. Every time I drive 101 on the coast, I'm constantly scanning and planning what driveway or what side road I'd go up to get away from a tsunami. "I could turn around and go back to that one road - oh wait here's a new one.…

Do you commute a long way? Is it possible that it's just your mind keeping busy/creative while you commute? I find my mind playing out similar doomsday scenarios and solutions when I'm doing something repetitive for longer periods of time.

It's about a 10 minute drive to work, 15 on my bicycle :)

This is more when on the coast for vacation or when traveling between cities in the valley like on weekends.

That said I know what you mean - I do that when I'm biking with traffic, thinking about what people MIGHT do to cut me off, etc. as opposed to what's actually happening.

Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#96

Post by jcranendonk »

Retric wrote: post #70
_xlr2 wrote: post #2

I'm appreciative of somebody who also has OCD writing an article like this detailing how the disorder isn't at all like the stereotype of a neat freak. What's funny is, I myself am actually a terribly messy person with books and papers always strewn about (among clothes not quite in the hamper, &c). What's interesting to me from a personal history viewpoint is that one of my earliest compulsions also centered around…

Would it help if you had a webcam pointed at the door so you could remotely verify it's closed and locked? Or do you need some the actual feeling of the door being closed to end the fixation?

It may help in the moment, but any action that reinforces the (faulty) belief that your obsessive thoughts are relevant and worth paying attention to will worsen OCD over time.

The right approach is to teach yourself to be OK with the uncertainty of the door being locked or not. This is what behavioral therapy for OCD, specifically ERP, aims to do.

Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#97

Post by [deleted] »

pugworthy wrote: post #87

Mine is earthquakes and tsunamis. I live in Oregon, where we are due for a big one "some day", and I grew up on the Oregon coast, where there historically have been major inundations in some areas. Every time I drive 101 on the coast, I'm constantly scanning and planning what driveway or what side road I'd go up to get away from a tsunami. "I could turn around and go back to that one road - oh wait here's a new one.…

[deleted]

Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#98

Post by dm03514 »

classichasclass wrote: post #50

I'm one of the "chronic checker" types. I used to be really bad about checking and rechecking door locks, particularly, but also the fridge and the garage. If I check absentmindedly and without intention, I'll have to do it all over again. What really helped me get out the door in the morning, and still does, is actually to video myself doing it. When I got a Palm Zire 72, for the first time I could actually leave wi…

OMG I too am a "chronic checker". When my first son was born and my OCD was aggravated by exhaustion, and living in a relatively unsafe part of baltimore, I would have these 10 "check loops". I just couldn't be 100% certain the door was locked. Even at the time some part of me realized the absurdity of it.

Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#99

Post by rconti »

scarejunba wrote: post #12

I was like ten years old when I had to even out things if I stepped on a crack in the pavement. If I brushed by something on one side I had to even it out. If I bumped into something, I'd have to go back and bump the other side evenly. One day I saw a TV show or a movie where someone was like that and people treated them like they were retarded. So I tried really hard to stop it. Over the next few years, I just got r…

I still totally have the 'evening out' thing, in my late 30s. But it comes and goes -- I could mostly rid myself of it, I'm sure, if I set my mind to it, like you did. I guess I'm very lucky in that way. I have had times where it was more prominent (perhaps in times of higher stress or anxiety) but for the past decade or two its' just been a minor background thing with no real consequence.

I can imagine how debilitating it must be for those who truly suffer.

Re: The terrible 'what if': how OCD makes every day a matter of life or death

#100

Post by august9 »

fb03 wrote: post #44

I am not gonna post this as anonymous, because I need to put this out of my chest: I am absolutely terrified of blood pressure being high/measuring it. I was giggling (and almost crying) while reading the article, because putting it out into words makes it sounds really ridiculous, stupid, and obvious, but for us while we are following one of our 'mental stories', it feels very real. I have the same stuff OP wrote ab…

Oh, this is so me. Except I'm constantly convinced I'm having a heart attack. For some reason I associate a fast pulse with imminent death. Then I start to panic and the adrenaline floods in and guess what? My pulse gets faster and the cycle continues.

It usually comes up out of nowhere when I'm alone, like I'm convinced I'm going to pass out and nobody is going to know and I'll die for lack of treatment. My doctor actually laughed at me when I described taking a shower, feeling my pulse go up, and imagining passing out, the hot water running out and me dying of a combined heart attack / hypothermia / drowning situation because it would be hours before anyone noticed I was missing. Don't get me started on what goes through my head while driving alone on a highway or, the horror, being out on a lake in a canoe.

I try to ride my bike at least 16km a day, and it does help condition me to experiencing a high pulse without sudden death. EKG, stress test, heart ultrasound all came back perfect save for the palpitations, which my doctor described as "extremely, extremely benign." I feel better for a little while after every test but it inevitably comes back, as if I constantly need a medical professional to explain to me that I'm not dying.

Are you considering treatment? I'm certainly thinking about it at this point.

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