101–110 of 153 posts
Earlier quoted context omitted.
English is my second language and I did not want to sound rude. I meant 'the guy that is supposed to be the biological father and he is not but he doesn't know'. In Spanish, we have a very rude word for these men: 'Los cornudos'. I love the conciseness in languages but I don't like to sound rude in HN. Sorry! ;-)
"partner" would be the right word for where you have used "couple" here.
I dated a girl in the nineties that worked at a maternity ward in a very popular hospital. She said that just comparing blood types five to ten percent of the babies did not belong to the mother’s couple. And of course doctors and nurses never said a word.
"Los cornudos" - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cuckold
There was an interesting thread on reddit where people were sharing their experiences with DNA tests and their parentage/ancestry. I was surprised with sheer number of them being listed/shared there. I never considered DNA tests will have such a weird side effects. It's a fascinating to see how much science or scientific tests in future can lead to weird results (not that I'm condoning cheating or anything) - Thread…
Heh, DNA tests to reveal what we are, and CRISPR to put an end to it.
There was an interesting thread on reddit where people were sharing their experiences with DNA tests and their parentage/ancestry. I was surprised with sheer number of them being listed/shared there. I never considered DNA tests will have such a weird side effects. It's a fascinating to see how much science or scientific tests in future can lead to weird results (not that I'm condoning cheating or anything) - Thread…
Maybe part of the issue is an over-emphasis on "fidelity". People have always played around - or to be frank, many women have been assaulted and had to keep it quiet - maybe the best outcome would be more open communication and understanding between couples rather than even more prescriptive social norms about how relationships should work.
Most people don't "play around". We have statistic proof about it.
> or to be frank, many women have been assaulted and had to keep it quiet
I'm pretty sure most of the 23andme customers are in the US and not in the congo. By "many" women, you mean almost no women right?
> maybe the best outcome would be more open communication and understanding between couples rather than even more prescriptive social norms about how relationships should work.
Opening communication and understanding are the prescriptive social norm. You make it seem like cheating and rape is the norm. Also, most people agree on how relationships should work. That's how we got "prescriptive social norms".
Earlier quoted context omitted.
The French government claims that fatherhood is determined by society, and not biology. That is a very unscientific law.
> That is a very unscientific law. And yours is an extraordinarily myopic view. It should be obvious that fatherhood is more about kinship bond, duty, and obligation than it is about genetics.
> It’s getting harder and harder to keep secrets in our society
That motif seems to be permeating deeper and deeper into every aspect of modern life.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
No. If one was raped it should be reported and the perpetrator should be prosecuted. You cannot let these people go unpunished and potentially rape others.
That is a vastly simplistic view of rape and sexual assault and comes very close to victim blaming. In many societies there is a stigma attached to sexual assault victims, even in western society many victims get blamed: "why was she wearing that dress?", "why was she in the club on her own if she was in a relationship?", "why did she walk through the park at night on her own?", "maybe she went home with him and just…
No they don't. Which western society? In western society ( US for example ), we presume the alleged victim is telling the truth and the accused is guilty. In western society, we release the name of the accused and protect identity of the alleged victim. Even when the courts find out that the accuser lied, her name is withheld and protected.
Don't know which "western society" you are from, but in the US, it's usually the accused, not the alleged victim, that suffer, whether the rape happened or not.
> "why was she wearing that dress?", "why was she in the club on her own if she was in a relationship?", "why did she walk through the park at night on her own?"
What? This is simply a lie. You know it.
> "maybe she went home with him and just regretted it the next day".
Because we have cases of this happening. Remember the mattress girl from columbia? We have a few high profile cases of women consensually having sex with guys and then regretting it later and then falsely accusing the men of rape.
I'm tired of the false narrative of rape and rape society of the west. Does rape happen in the west. Sure. Are rape cases prosecuted. Yes. Are rape victims ( and even false accusers ) protected. Yes. But stop lying about how we shame or attack rape victims. Maybe in the 1800s, but not today.
Regarding the misattributed paternity numbers/rates: Obviously interviewing people isn't going to reveal the correct numbers: If a mother isn't going to tell her child, or doesn't know [switched in the maternity ward, chimera, multiple partners] chances are they aren't going to tell some random researcher either. However, there was some interesting research at a hospital in the UK (maybe Bristol ?) which tested the m…
Perhaps the Swedish have a higher incidence, and the Saudis lower. One should not look at a single study in a single place at a single time, that depends almost entirely on human behaviour, and extrapolate to humans as a whole.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
No. If one was raped it should be reported and the perpetrator should be prosecuted. You cannot let these people go unpunished and potentially rape others.
That is a vastly simplistic view of rape and sexual assault and comes very close to victim blaming. In many societies there is a stigma attached to sexual assault victims, even in western society many victims get blamed: "why was she wearing that dress?", "why was she in the club on her own if she was in a relationship?", "why did she walk through the park at night on her own?", "maybe she went home with him and just…
To call these things "victim blaming" is disingenuous, I think, because it makes it sound like someone is saying that you are guilty of rape (of yourself) if you do those things. Instead, we need to separate between two acts: rape, and subjecting yourself to danger (danger of rape, in this instance). The latter is not a crime and does not make you an accomplice of the rape, and it does not take any guilt of the rapist, but it might still be stupid and blameworthy on its own, as a separate act, even if it ends well and no rape occurs. I mean, my loved ones surely would be upset with me if I subjected myself to excessive danger, or just neglected to lock my door when I left home.
The danger in question does not even have to be related to a crime. It could be recklessly climbing a mountain or a scaffold. In that case, it certainly not about taking responsibility of a wrong from a criminal and putting it on the victim – because there is no such wrong – but blame might still be reasonable.
> "maybe she went home with him and just regretted it the next day"
This falls in neither of the above two categories. It is just a hypothesis that has to be taken into account like any other.
... “This generation right now and maybe the next 15 years or so, there’s going to be a lot of shocking results coming out. I’d say in 20 years’ time it’s going to dissipate,” she predicted. By then, our expectations of privacy will have caught up with the new reality created by the rise of consumer DNA tests. This reminds me of a discussion in which people were speculating about things that would not exist in the fu…
One can not have freedom with out privacy. As we destroy the concept of privacy we also destroy the concept of freedom. It will be interesting how civilization handles it. We are starting to see some signs of push back, but unfortunely people are turning to governments and authoritarianism as a "solution". IMO we are at at fork in civilization, and it seems we are choosing the less free, less private path
Why is that? I want both, but I think they are different things.