Hacker News Board Hacker News, browsed like a classic message board
Live data from Hacker News

Ask HN: Depression and job

news.ycombinator.com

Post reply on HN
Print view View original

21–30 of 78 posts

Re: Ask HN: Depression and job

#21

Post by masukomi »

> What should I do? Is quitting this job a good idea?

yes, absolutely. I've been there. I've burnt out twice and i'm working on my third. (not proud of that statement at all). In my experience it's not a question of if it will get better. It's only a question of how many coping techniques you can put in place to extend the time before you loose it completely (and probably dramatically). Also note that the stress associated with burnout is hard on the body. Want a heart attack at a young age? keep courting burnout....

If i were you i'd also do some serious internal searching regarding if this _carrer_ might also be worth quitting. I dunno, maybe you love programming, in which case the question is more how to find a way to make a living at it that doesn't keep burning you out.

I quit and did something i loved that was completely unrelated to programming for four months. it was amazing. it was life changing. Now i'm back in a co. and my values aren't well aligned and it's burning me out again. I will quit. I will do the thing i love, and i'll probably never work for The Man again. I still love programming. I'll keep doing it. Just, not for the man, and on my own schedule. I'll probably end up making a fraction of my current income, and it'll be worth every penny.

You sound like you're into the pretty severe end of burnout. My opinion is that no amount of money is worth that. Do whatever it takes to take care of yourself and live your daily life in a way that makes you smile, regardless of if it involves a pay cut.

also, major kudos for getting the help of a therapist. and good luck.

Re: Ask HN: Depression and job

#22

Post by Nasrudith »

It depends on the situation - would you be worse off with unemployment mentally? I would recommend getting another job lined up first. I know in my case lack of a mental challenge created a nasty feedback loop leaving me too dismotivated to start a helpful side project and made me worse at interviewing.

I have found it helpful to try to be open to yourself about your emotions and not holding back as much as you can get away with. Repression is a bad move for depression. Is it the hours? The pointlessness? Feeling that on some level working there is betraying your ideals? Lack of a social connection?

The root or excaberator is generally personal. For instance I have heard many accounts of superficial success but persistent depression until they realized they were living in the closet. Meanwhile others seem to truly lack an underlying cause other than brain chemistry going rogue.

Re: Ask HN: Depression and job

#23

Post by gfs78 »

> I have a good job...(which doesn't align with my values that much)...Lately I've been feeling depressed and overwhelmed and burnout from all the work that I have to do...I wake up every morning feeling anxious, I am starting to have panick attacks at work...The other day I started crying while talking to a collegue...

Why do you think your job is good?

Provided you have some job alternatives: what's is this job giving you that you wont be able to get in some other job?

What keeps you working there?

Re: Ask HN: Depression and job

#24

Post by ravenstine »

If it were me, I'd just quit. Fuck. That. Shit.

Life is too short to be depressed, or so much as be bored or at a dead end.

If your company doesn't align with your values, then all the more reason to leave.

If you have some personal projects you want to work on, build up some funds so you con quit and comfortably take a sabbatical and then spend some time applying for positions in the latter half of it.

Do you have family and friends? Chances are at least one of them will help you if times get tough. If you have a support network, remember that you can use it.

If you are crying at work, that means your job isn't as valuable as you think it is. It probably sucks.

If you have sick time, use a bunch of it so you can calm down and rationally decide what your exit strategy will be.

By the way, I recently quit my job with nothing lined up. The company was great, but I had personal projects I wanted time for and needed a change. This is a thing people do, and they usually survive it. Don't buy the social pressure that says working hard is a virtue in and of itself, or that you're a bum because you quit for your own health and are "unemployed".

One day not too long from now, you'll look back at this job and wonder why you put up with it for so long.

Re: Ask HN: Depression and job

#25

Post by abawany »

Another vote for re-assessing this job and whether it is a good fit for you. I can vouch from personal experience that things that kill your soul have a huge effect from which it is sometimes difficult to bounce back. Many of these places count on your presumably youthful and abundant energy to ride to their dreams but by burning out, you may never be able to get to yours.

We all get one life in our current form and the challenge in this world, just like those standardized exams, is to figure out what is good/relevant and what is not - you are already ahead if you identified the not-good/irrelevant so toss it and go find something that is good for you instead. Edit: I would advise though that rebound is a thing so don't jump too hastily into a worse position - advice from trusted mentors is friends is what you need to either see the value in the current role and/or a future opportunity.

Re: Ask HN: Depression and job

#26

Post by datakack »

Are you 100% sure of the root cause of your depression? You may quit your job but if that was not the reason you would be back on square one. My suggestion ask yourself some difficult and honest questions without any emotional context. Based on the answers make a decision. Speak with your therapist and use her/him as your sounding board. But make sure you know the root cause before you make you next move. Most of us "think" we know why but its not necessarily the right answer.

Re: Ask HN: Depression and job

#27

Post by _8j50 »

Maybe you should see if taking a few weeks off from work is possible.

I won't advise you about depression since I don't qualify to do so,but I do know changing your environment can have a significant psychological impact. It could make things better or worse.

When a program doesn't work right you need someone who understands how programs work, to debug them,analyze the root cause and implement a fix. Doesn't have to be a therapist,just find someone who qualifies and let them debug you.

Edit: Interesting post on hn you might find useful: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=17523475

Re: Ask HN: Depression and job

#28

Post by ljw1001 »

datakack wrote: post #26

Are you 100% sure of the root cause of your depression? You may quit your job but if that was not the reason you would be back on square one. My suggestion ask yourself some difficult and honest questions without any emotional context. Based on the answers make a decision. Speak with your therapist and use her/him as your sounding board. But make sure you know the root cause before you make you next move. Most of us…

Great question. I've found sometimes in hindsight that when I was unhappy I changed a thing that was easy to change, rather than the thing most responsible for my unhappiness.

Re: Ask HN: Depression and job

#29

Post by datakack »

Mc_Big_G wrote: post #7

* Leave work after 8 hours without making excuses * Go to bed at the same time every night * Get at least 7 hours of sleep. Try for 8. * Stop drinking alcohol and using drugs * Eat better. Cook your own meals. Do meal prep to make it easier. * Start exercising. Start 3x per week, 15 min of HIIT per day. * Drink a large glass of water when you wake up. Drink water throughout the day. * Don't drink more than one cup of…

To add to the above awesome list.

* Do some martial arts its a good confidence booster. It doesn't have to be MMA, even aikido can be good. And you get to socialize(with a different mindset crowd) at the same time.

* And yes meds work both ways. It can take the edge off as much as the lows. So you will not get as "excited" as much as you used to be before. It puts you on an even plateau.

Post reply on HN