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Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

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Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#91
post #60

One of my earlier memories is my dad going away to GW1. And when it wasn't war it was training or night flying or exchanges or just on standby while we were away. After my dad left the air force he worked in Saudi for 10 years or so, during which I spent much of my time in boarding schools. Conversely I work from home and see my kids all the time, albeit they're still younger than my own memories. Only last week I ha…

Sorry if I'm obtuse but I guess it's because that's too tall for the air force?

[deleted]

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#92
post #68

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If you work in tech, you're not dealing with typical masculine behavior. Much of the anti-male sentiment in tech is from men (from the perspective of women) getting/internalizing the rewards of being successful without acting like a successful man. Men normally are able to control their negative emotions, but you're right that women can be dichotomous, especially in tech. You can predict it if you know why and how th…

There is no more manly profession then working in tech for collage educated people. People are literally choosing tech because, and I am quoting here, "it is good job for a boy". I mean, it is good job, but boys are not loosing masculinity by doing tech at all. Quite the opposite. Men in tech are somewhat more introverted then the rest. They are not more emotional nor feminine then actors, writers, sales or literally…

I'm assuming this is India you're talking about?

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#93

Something I find bemusing are the never ending slew of studies that aim to evangelize 'new ideas' in parenting and child rearing contrasted against the negative changes in outcomes of children and young adults in the US today. Children and young adults in the US today are, compared to decades past, suffering sharp spikes in mental illness, obesity, as well as performing relatively worse academically and even exhibiti…

And yet juvenile crime is not only at a 30-year low but keeps hitting new lows year after year after year. [0] [1] [2] [3]

[0] http://www.cjcj.org/uploads/cjcj/documents/CA_Youth_Crime_20...

[1] https://www.scpr.org/blogs/news/2012/10/31/10793/explaining-...

[2] https://johnjayrec.nyc/2013/10/03/databit201304/

[3] https://jjie.org/2015/02/26/ncjj-report-shows-juvenile-crime...

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#94
post #73

Hypothesis: Today's dads behave more like kids, compared to previous generations. I mean, 40 year olds dress like teenagers (sneakers, t-shirt, jeans, sometimes a cap), they often have the same hobbies as teenagers (e.g. video gaming), and responsibility is low because there is a high level of social security.

Interesting point.

I don't think behaving more like kids is something confined to dads, or even men as a whole either. It seems modern adults are maturing far more slowly or even showing some signs of regression now.

I don't have anything to compare it with, but grown men burning their evenings in front of a games console, playing games aimed at children, and grown women slathering pictures of themselves all over social media in an attempt to garner attention and social acceptance, with both groups seeming to want to be their kids' "buddies" more than ever, doesn't seem to be a positive direction for things to go in.

Who knows. I may be bah humbugging here. I'm young enough that I can't reasonably say "in my day adults were adults!", just that the direction things appear to be going in (socially, and as role models for children) does not appear to be promising.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#95

My parents were both teachers, I got a lot of time with them as such.. However my dad was just never interested in really spending time with us, other than a good 5 minutes then he was bored and wanted to do his thing. I spent A LOT of time with my mum, she taught me programming, and after a while I was teaching her newer stuff. My mum was the real MVP, my passion for everything comes from my mother. My father howeve…

Love this project! My son is turning two in August, and he loves smashing the keyboard on my laptop. Having a dedicated PC for him would be fun. And he'd love to help build it, I'm sure.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#96
post #73

Hypothesis: Today's dads behave more like kids, compared to previous generations. I mean, 40 year olds dress like teenagers (sneakers, t-shirt, jeans, sometimes a cap), they often have the same hobbies as teenagers (e.g. video gaming), and responsibility is low because there is a high level of social security.

> because there is a high level of social security.

Not in America.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#97
post #88

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This CEO should suffer legal consequences.

If a startup is running on tight runway then female staff getting pregnant could be massively detrimental. In many civilized parts of the world, a female employee getting pregnant will mean disruption during the pregnancy to accommodate doctor's visits and health issues, and then months of paid leave PLUS having to pay to backfill their position with a temp, plus the costs of recruiting and ramping up said temp. That…

Not sure I could disagree more with this. (Not to mention, this is exactly the kind of attitude that makes it hard for women to work in tech.)

There are regular doctor's visits during pregnancy, yes, but that's a few hours a month. Surely even the smallest startups can absorb that kind of "disruption".

And typically, since parents know well in advance when and how much leave they'll need to take, the team can plan around the leave and how to take over that work in someone's absence. In most cases, you'll have 5-6 months to prepare.

I work for a small startup - fewer than 20 employees - and two of our team members are married. They had a baby and were both out for month (the mom took more time after that), and everything continued to function just fine because we'd planned for it. And if we needed them, they were just an email or text away.

Finally, parents can be some of the most efficient workers on a team, and are great candidates for startups. They are experienced in time management and balancing multiple tasks and stakeholders.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#98
post #94
post #73

Hypothesis: Today's dads behave more like kids, compared to previous generations. I mean, 40 year olds dress like teenagers (sneakers, t-shirt, jeans, sometimes a cap), they often have the same hobbies as teenagers (e.g. video gaming), and responsibility is low because there is a high level of social security.

Interesting point. I don't think behaving more like kids is something confined to dads, or even men as a whole either. It seems modern adults are maturing far more slowly or even showing some signs of regression now. I don't have anything to compare it with, but grown men burning their evenings in front of a games console, playing games aimed at children, and grown women slathering pictures of themselves all over soc…

> I may be bah humbugging here.

You are. Two things:

1. How is spending (not burning) an evening in front of the console any worse than spending it in front of the TV?

2. You're painting with a really, really broad brush there. Some grown men play a lot of video games, and some women post a lot on social media, but not all of them do, and in any case, I'm not entirely sure what the problem with socializing online is.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#99
post #88

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This CEO should suffer legal consequences.

If a startup is running on tight runway then female staff getting pregnant could be massively detrimental. In many civilized parts of the world, a female employee getting pregnant will mean disruption during the pregnancy to accommodate doctor's visits and health issues, and then months of paid leave PLUS having to pay to backfill their position with a temp, plus the costs of recruiting and ramping up said temp. That…

Honestly, this just fuels my dislike of startups. Startup culture is toxic by nature.

My advice is this: companies need to suck it up. We live in a society with rules and laws for a reason. If your business can't exist under those rules and laws, then it doesn't belong in society. Ventures that are detrimental to society simply shouldn't be allowed.

Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids

#100
post #88

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This CEO should suffer legal consequences.

If a startup is running on tight runway then female staff getting pregnant could be massively detrimental. In many civilized parts of the world, a female employee getting pregnant will mean disruption during the pregnancy to accommodate doctor's visits and health issues, and then months of paid leave PLUS having to pay to backfill their position with a temp, plus the costs of recruiting and ramping up said temp. That…

I’d like you to try doing a mental exercise and see if you feel okay with what you’ve written here.

s/pregnant/cancer/ and then ask yourself if you would feel comfortable inquiring about medical history during the hiring process.

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