61–70 of 348 posts
Love isn't as strong as mental illness, and that no amount of hope and heart can solve problems for someone who won't admit they have them.
In my experience getting ppl to admit their issues isn't the way to go. Showing them a path exists to overcome the issues, without a requirement for them to admit anything is. Understanding that is love. And that's hard work. "Work is love made visible"
Thank you though.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
Can you expand on the third point?
It's a bit tongue in cheek, I don't really recommend that everybody moves overseas. But for me, I was in a city that I didn't really like, and a job that I didn't really like. I wasn't going anywhere and I wasn't saving any money. Basically, my life was on hold. I had worked at my job for a year, and had saved a total of zero dollars, my boss was never going to give me a pay rise, and I was feeling like shit at work.…
It reminds me of a buddy who moved out here from the east coast to live here in the Bay with essentially nothing.
He racked up a bunch of credit card debt and slept on our couch for about three months but ultimately was able to land an amazing gig in SF and is now doing great.
Wondering when I'm going to fold my hand a do the same type of thing.
Earlier quoted context omitted.
You didn't told us what it taught you.
It taught me that people react differently in stressful situations than they say they are going to. Also, when I was growing up, my parents always said "divorce is wrong; you can always make a marriage work if you try hard enough". Interestingly, they've completely flipped on that opinion now that they've heard how I'm being treated, but I guess I'm still "brainwashed". If I didn't have these irrational moral qualms,…
If she doesn't and you value working at the offered position in that location more than your relationship (I know, it's hard to think in those terms but be honest with yourself).. The other commenters might be on to something.
Moving to the other side of the US is like moving to another country in some aspects. She didn't qualify your original question as realistic, and didn't give you an honest answer. It's understandable - but now you're the one who needs to re-evaluate what you find more important.
Best of luck with it, I'm sure in time you'll be happier than you will be in the short term! Just be decisive and don't drag things out one way or another. And remember, grudges are heavier than forgiveness.
I'm in a pretty good position based on my own merits.
But I moved in with a friend at the advice that I'm too young to be living alone. I'm starting to miss it.
I would have earned a lot more and be much further in my career, potentially already employing people, if I hadn't listened to my peers and mentors when it comes to career advice. I should have looked at their position, given their age and compared it with my own. Technically they're amazing, career and money-wise, they should be much, much further ahead than I.
Save more. Get better with finance administration. Set hard goals and break them. Just because you earn almost 10-fold your first job, doesn't mean you should be spending more than you were before. Money drives business drives ideas drives change.
"Give me liberty, or give me death" is admirable as a philosophy for precisely as long as your own life is the only one being wagered.
> Gabriel (son): When I have a family of my own, I won't hide behind them
^ The Patriot
We undervalue ourselves most of the time. We overestimate our fears most of the time. An idea is nothing. Execution is everything.
We often behave as if some social triviality or temporary financial issue were actually life threatening, when indeed near-worst case scenarios are almost inconsequential. That person will judge you for a week or so then forget about it; if you fail financially you can rely on family, friends, savings, social security to not go homeless. The probabilities of bodily harm or true social outcasting are often very remote (and even outcast is often a but choice, since there are always other accepting people elsewhere).
Compare that with how much we fear climbing a simple step ladder -- we wouldn't give it much thought at all. But the probability of falling and having major bodily harm or even head trauma is perhaps much greater than the probability of poor outcomes from frightening daily situations. No that you shouldn't fear climbing ladders, just to give a perspective of how incongruent our intuitive fear can be to reality unless we police and adjust ourselves.
"Give me liberty, or give me death" is admirable as a philosophy for precisely as long as your own life is the only one being wagered.
> Benjamin (father): When you have a family of your own, perhaps you'll understand. > Gabriel (son): When I have a family of my own, I won't hide behind them ^ The Patriot
It's important to vote.
Before we got married, my wife said she would move with me to California if I ever got a good offer from a major tech company. This year I got an amazing job offer, and my wife threw a giant fit, told me she's not coming, and said "I took a gamble and lost. I never thought you would actually get an offer". Now she's refusing to get a job, wants me to continue paying for our house that she's living in on the east coas…