Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
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Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
#2Gosh, even as an engaged father myself, pointed BS propaganda likes this makes me want to tell "Jon McBride" that he's a sorry excuse for a man, turning on his own gender for click bait and cheap validation.
EDIT -
Let me be clear. Pointed adjectives like "negative" with no explanation definitely point to the "toxic masculinity" narrative. And this line: "There are many ways to be a man — being a “tough guy” is associated with poor parenting, which can negatively affect children." is pure dribble.
Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
#3My dad lost his job when I was 7 years old and my sister was 5. He went through 5 years of un- and under-employment. It was harrowing for him and my mom. But he also said in his later years that he would not have been there to see his kids growing up if he'd maintained the steady career progression that he originally expected. I have many fond memories of doing things with my dad during those years. He showed me how to start programming the family Commodore 64 [1]. We did experiments from books of science fair projects -- not for science fairs, just to satisfy my curiosity. We went on camping and fishing trips during summers and school vacations. When I visited friends' houses their dads didn't show up until later in the evening. They were also usually too tired from work to play or work on projects with us like my dad did when I had friends over.
I wouldn't wish involuntary unemployment on anyone. My family was lucky that my dad found steady salaried work again before the savings account was completely drained. The stress could have broken a weaker marriage. But I also got something from my dad's extra availability that I wouldn't even have known to miss until adulthood otherwise. Kids will remember and cherish extra engagement with them, whether the time you put in is planned or not.
[1] I partially credit my own career to his early help with programming. My friends growing up used 8 bit home computers too. But they didn't have dads working through the C64 Programmer's Reference Guide with them. They learned just enough to load/run software and I learned to write my own. I know that some kids can just pick up a teach-yourself book and learn simple programming on their own. 9-year-old me couldn't. I needed help from my dad. (Thanks, Dad. I miss you.)
Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
#4I believe that is a side effect of increased productivity and prosperity but is this study conditioned on the children having dads in first place? Because I believe single mother phenomenon is on a rapid rise in USA. What about children who dont know their dads ?
Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
#5I believe that is a side effect of increased productivity and prosperity but is this study conditioned on the children having dads in first place? Because I believe single mother phenomenon is on a rapid rise in USA. What about children who dont know their dads ?
They were studying fathers, so their denominator was fathers, not children. There's plenty of research showing that fathers make a big difference in their children's lives and happiness. From what I can tell this study doesn't speak to that one way or the other.
Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
#6I was trying to understand andrewclunn now dead comment below. Basically he was saying there was no need for the author of the article (not the study) to write "toxic masculinity" narrative. When I clicked on the PDF, to scan for the word "toxic" I was unable to open the PDF. Did the author of the article Jon McBride artificially put this narrative spin on the study?
If so, I don't understand why somebody would do this. Studies like this bring us wonderful news, there is no need to add negative connotation. Sure the tone of andrewclunn comment is debatable, but given he is a father, I think he is entitled to be upset about this because I am also. What do you think HN.
Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
#7My employer just increased their family leave from 12 weeks to 20 weeks, which is a great perk. These days nobody seems to differentiate from maternity vs paternity leave, which is a great idea because, aside from the value it provides fathers, it also gets rid of the idea that the mother should get more time because mothers should be more involved. (alas, you can argue that it ignores the physical sacrifices the mother makes, but as long as there is parity by raising men's leave up rather than reducing a woman's leave, who can argue with it?)
I don't have kids but I've often thought if I could get 6-12 months off for having a kid it would change the equation from impossible burden to work around to actually a pleasurable experience to learn/grow/bond/etc.
Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
#8My employer just increased their family leave from 12 weeks to 20 weeks, which is a great perk. These days nobody seems to differentiate from maternity vs paternity leave, which is a great idea because, aside from the value it provides fathers, it also gets rid of the idea that the mother should get more time because mothers should be more involved. (alas, you can argue that it ignores the physical sacrifices the mot…
Additionally, equal paternity leave is a great thing for women's rights too. When employers will see the same leave for their employees when they have a child regardless of gender, then there's less of a rational reason to discriminate against women in the hiring process.
Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
#9My employer just increased their family leave from 12 weeks to 20 weeks, which is a great perk. These days nobody seems to differentiate from maternity vs paternity leave, which is a great idea because, aside from the value it provides fathers, it also gets rid of the idea that the mother should get more time because mothers should be more involved. (alas, you can argue that it ignores the physical sacrifices the mot…
That extra paternity leave can give the dad the opportunity to be around to assist the mom while she's recovering from the birth - which helps her too. (And recovering emotionally as well as physically - post-partum depression can be paralyzing.)
It's just too bad that there's no way to offer an equivalent benefit for women without partners to provide them the same sort of support.
Re: Study: Today’s dads are engaging more with their kids
#10I was trying to understand andrewclunn now dead comment below. Basically he was saying there was no need for the author of the article (not the study) to write "toxic masculinity" narrative. When I clicked on the PDF, to scan for the word "toxic" I was unable to open the PDF. Did the author of the article Jon McBride artificially put this narrative spin on the study? If so, I don't understand why somebody would do th…
I don't see the comment you're referring to, but McBride was quoting one of the authors of the study. Technically this isn't "spin", Toxic Masculinity and Hegemonic Masculinity are both fields of study in psychology having to do with promotion of dominance and violence. I think both fields influenced this study. It looks like they developed a Parent-Child-Conflict scale that included spanking, hitting, or threatening physical harm to measure some of this, but the study is much more broader than just this.