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Ask HN: Best practices for onboarding new employees?

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Re: Ask HN: Best practices for onboarding new employees?

#81

This is how I've seen it done in very small companies: 1. Greet the new person and ask them what they are doing there? Are they a vendor? client? someone who accidentally walked in? Oh, they're a new employee. 2. Ask them if they know what their job is supposed to be. If not, find them a spot to sit down while you ask around. 3. Ask IT to get them a laptop. If they don't have one, send out to get one from best buy. W…

> Day 2, you are asked to do something really massive because by now you must surely know your way around.

At big companies, my experience has been that if you know either where something is or what color something is, you are now the goto expert on that something for the rest of your life.

Re: Ask HN: Best practices for onboarding new employees?

#82
post #15
post #13

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> 12 binders full of details about healthcare, policies, what happens if you pass away and other remote events My biggest pet peeve. Oh, you're a 23 year old college grad? Better take time during your first hour of being in the real world to pick your life insurance policy and memorize what building alarm code to use if you happen to be the only one in the office at 4am on a Sunday (during a holiday weekend).

This was an actual exchange during my onboarding at a previous job: "Please provide six contact addresses for the company's emergency notification system." "I don't have six contact addresses." "Just repeat some on the form."

I had to create and then maintain an excel file for this reason. There is no other way I am remembering who witnessed me living somewhere 15 years ago.

Re: Ask HN: Best practices for onboarding new employees?

#83
A who's who list, org chart, and a wiki page of how to set your machine up to start working (as few steps as possible), plus a few wiki pages of house rules.

Maybe do something fun on the first day or week to make a lasting impression that they are valued. Taking a new employee out for lunch is a good one. I remember the company that did that and I was impressed (you usually have to wait until you quit!).

Re: Ask HN: Best practices for onboarding new employees?

#84
from your question, you just got into the company, hence, don't trust much from your direct employees before you do something to earn their respect. All of them truly believe to be more qualified to your position than you, a "newcomer straight out of street", and deserving of a promotion when you fails.

Find the person latest hired, most close to your position and pay him/her a lunch, take notes of the next steps ( which accesses are needed, to whom to speak, how is the politics, who are the known backstabbers, etc... ).

Re: Ask HN: Best practices for onboarding new employees?

#85
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Re: Ask HN: Best practices for onboarding new employees?

#86
post #39

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Just don't spend 2 weeks on step 5, because that happened to me at my current job. They completely forgot they even hired me and wondered who that guy was in that cubicle over there.

I cant tell whether you are joking. Seriously. What did you do for 2 weeks?

Oh crap I didn't realize people would actually respond to me. I just kinda sat at my cubicle and did nothing. Everything was blocked on the internet so I couldn't really do much. Went home and cried.

Re: Ask HN: Best practices for onboarding new employees?

#87
post #64

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Out of undergrad I was recruited by a major defense contractor and selected for a leadership development program. Aside from making me fly various places and do nothing they also made me do nothing at my "home" desk in a secure facility (so no cell phone or playful browsing) by myself. I found a bunch of old math texts and starting reading them and doing practice problems out of sheer boredom. It was then without the…

You passed up a leadership career at a defense contractor to read some books you could have read at home? Sounds like they recognized that this person they hired wasn't all that and decided that rather than fire you and risk a lot of paper work they tucked you away knowing that you would quit eventually, this is often preferable to termination. The odds that your lack of productivity went unnoticed is slim, they noti…

Oh it was all fine, just the work wasn’t hard or interesting and there wasn’t that much of it (except for crazy spikes for 2-3 weeks sometimes) I dont feel like I passed on anything significant. I was just really under utilized. I got poached by a startup and they offered to match but I declined. If your great goal is leadership at a DoD shop I would recommend a better goal. Even if you make it up the ladder over 15-35 years the top of that ladder just isn’t that great, or at least it wasn’t for me. I keep in touch with some other people from the program, all have since moved on. I would say this indicates the program didn’t know how to utilize and retain the “talent” it selected for. And sure you can argue we all weren’t that talented, I don’t particularly care, I am very happy with that particular career choice.
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