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Diamonds Suck (2006)

diamondssuck.com

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Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#191

Post by bowlich »

nailer wrote: post #3

Another option: second hand diamonds, which diamond merchants will tell you don't exist. People die, if they don't pass their stones onto their children, this is where they end up. Sotheby's jewelly auctions. Know what you want, buy stones and ignore settings (they'll be dated and you can sell the metals), and know you're the only retail customer in a room full of diamond merchants. Another option: get a house deposi…

I've thrown around the property idea myself (we already own the house). Instead of the big ring, or an expensive party. I could buy her ten acres somewhere nice for a future retirement-vacation house.

The value is almost guaranteed to appreciate over the course of our marriage (which strikes me as romantic) -- and if there is an unfortunate divorce, she has a chunk of valuable land to sell instead of a useless rock.

Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#192

Post by hrktb »

Ntrails wrote: post #130
hrktb wrote: post #83

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That’s still usually not the most important. For instance even if your partner is the best thing that ever happens to your life, the most important moment will be the proposal or whatever moment you recognize and mutually accept you need each other in your life. The wedding is the inking of the deal, the most important moment is when you agree to the deal in the first place (and I hope that’s way far before the weddi…

Saying that you will do a thing and doing a thing do not have equal merit. If I say I'm going to climb everest, you can be sure that the moment which is remembered is the one where I made it to the top (or failed to). Similarly the birth of a child, not the agreement to try and conceive, is the bit that matters. (Although I'll accept the getting pregnant somewhat) The act of marriage, of declaring in front of witness…

I agree with your point, to the extent that climbing a mountain or birthing a child have a clear end you can evaluate afterwards to mark if you did it or not.

Mariage in theory only has a beginning, and in our times it’s mainly a promise (signing the paper or vowing in front of costumed people doesn’t mean that much more anymore).

Some people stay together without ever marrying, other sign the papers and do a wedding afterward (a lot of churches will actualy require the papers to be done before), or never. So, if the question is “where did it start ?”, my answer would be at the point where both people agreed to be together.

At that point you are effectively together, already doing what you are saying.

Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#193

Post by groby_b »

NikolaNovak wrote: post #129

Anybody know anything about this "Moissanite" thing? I find it interesting that in the 100+ comments here, there's no mention of the item the linked website so heavily promotes, yet I personally never heard of until now. One of the reasons I love HN is that usually relevant knowledge and experience will come out of woodworks and share their wisdom - so, anybody ever heard of "Moissanite"? :)

It's a stone engineered to be a diamond replacement, as the article mentions. From there, what would you like to know? (My wife's a jeweler, so I'll probably have to forward the harder question, but as study-buddy for her gemologist education I know at least some trivia :)

It's... a different stone. You can usually tell cut diamonds and moissanites apart with the naked eye once they reach a sufficient size. (Moissanites have a telltale rainbow sparkle, diamonds don't. Large moissanites have a color tinge, "good" diamonds don't)

You can debate which one looks better - I prefer diamonds with an old european cut, because they're spectacular :) - but ultimately, it's a rock. You buy a pretty bauble because you like how it looks. There's very little intrinsic value here.

Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#194

Post by goodJobWalrus »

bufferoverflow wrote: post #190
tvanantwerp wrote: post #138

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I'm immensely grateful that my wife is from Hong Kong. Wedding gifts there take the form of cash in a red envelope, and it's normal to get married at a profit. When I explained to her that American weddings are usually held at a considerable loss, her reaction was to set the wedding budget to as close to zero as possible. I think the Hong Kong idea makes much more sense--a newly married couple needs a financial boost…

If most people around you get married, there's no profit. It's, roughly, a zero sum game. Everyone gifts everyone money.

No really, if a lot of them (gift givers) are older family members (already married). In that case, you will pay back much later when you are that older family, so, at best, it's like a long-term loan when you needed most.

Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#195

Post by cf498 »

Blackstone4 wrote: post #174
collyw wrote: post #126

Earlier quoted context omitted.

From peep show, one of the funniest comedies around in my opinion. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4QRf-HKJ8E&t=8m20s

That video was blocked for me.... maybe because I'm in the UK. Is it this clip? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gUH6oRkWm-Q

No the part after the marriage where sophie starts crying in the car and Mark tells her to stop seeing the wedding is over and they are over that hump

Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#196

Post by lostlogin »

ergothus wrote: post #180
retSava wrote: post #22

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yeah, it's upsetting. As soon as merchandise X is prefixed with "wedding", the cost is doubled. Wedding cake? Boom. Wedding napkins? Check. Etc. It's astonishing how easy it is to fall into the trap of "it's just a one-time event", "it's the most important day of my life", etc.

This is not an exaggeration. Many fields such as makeup, hair, and photography literally charge more for the same work if it is a wedding. I have a friend who is a makeup artist who gets angry if she discovers a client has hidden the fact that the work is for a wedding. Not because it impacts the work, but solely because it changes the hourly rate she would charge.

Working with weddings is awful and most definitely impacts the work. Everything is high stress and fraught with complicated politics - I was involved in the photography side of things.

Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#197

Post by Ntrails »

hrktb wrote: post #192
Ntrails wrote: post #130

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Saying that you will do a thing and doing a thing do not have equal merit. If I say I'm going to climb everest, you can be sure that the moment which is remembered is the one where I made it to the top (or failed to). Similarly the birth of a child, not the agreement to try and conceive, is the bit that matters. (Although I'll accept the getting pregnant somewhat) The act of marriage, of declaring in front of witness…

I agree with your point, to the extent that climbing a mountain or birthing a child have a clear end you can evaluate afterwards to mark if you did it or not. Mariage in theory only has a beginning, and in our times it’s mainly a promise (signing the paper or vowing in front of costumed people doesn’t mean that much more anymore). Some people stay together without ever marrying, other sign the papers and do a wedding…

> signing the paper or vowing in front of costumed people doesn’t mean that much more anymore

I fundamentally disagree with this. I think that lots of people view this thing very differently, and to some extent that's just cultural and based on their own views and experiences.

(Basically, I'm going to go with agree to disagree because I think your view is valid albeit not one I ascribe to)

Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#198

Post by throwawaymath »

theunixbeard wrote: post #176
throwawaymath wrote: post #156

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Yes, you're right. I don't understand the myopia on this forum when it comes to people spending money irrationally. Human beings are not hyper-efficient savings maximization engines. Every time the story about why "diamonds suck" hits the front page (maybe once a year or so?), the same rounds of patting-on-the-back are exchanged in the comments for rehashing a one-dimensional social commentary that buying diamonds is…

Are you an entrepreneur with a profitable business or successful exit? If not, 30K might represent 6-12 months of personal runway to build your own business.

Successful exit.

Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#199

Post by cf498 »

koolba wrote: post #169
throwawaymath wrote: post #160

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That strikes me as a problem with fiscal irresponsibility, not a problem with the object of the irresponsibility.

It's by far the biggest example of fiscal irresponsibility. What's particularly egregious is when the families of the bride ( _cough_ her mother _cough_ ) or groom push them towards spending they can't afford. The wedding industry preys on those weak emotions knowing that many couples won't push back on the non-sense.

Weddings are a good example of horrible vicious social pressure depending on where you live.

Too much of this is similar to "The child of a proper family marries at a certain age and gets a proper wedding".

Re: Diamonds Suck (2006)

#200

Post by nailer »

isostatic wrote: post #4

> If I can prevent a single reader from needlessly dropping $6,000-10,000+ on a diamond engagement ring, this site will be a success. Financial worries are the #1 cause of stress in a married relationship - there is absolutely NO excuse to start your married life by taking on that level of debt. Average U.S. wedding cost $30k in 2014, while the average engagement ring was $5600, or 19% of the cost [0] https://www.val…

Just book a restaurant table for 40 people. Don't tell them it's a weddding.
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