Actually, maybe I'm really busy, and doing the best I can. I value your time, but I value mine more. And obviously you're not as in demand as other people are. Sorry you can't appreciate that.
Now THAT is rude!
No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
11–20 of 132 posts
Re: No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
#12Re: No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
#13Interestingly, this is mostly an American (and a also a Western) problem. In most of the world (South America, Middle East, Africa, East Asia, etc), "on time" ranges anywhere between 30 minutes to 3 hours later. We grade our personal productivity level much more than other cultures. Other cultures value other things such as community and relationships at a higher level than we do. A story: I was invited to an Indian…
A party might be a different thing, but when you are meeting one or two people, the expectation is that they will not leave you standing around on your own for any length of time. This is a sign of bad time management on top of rudeness. I have known people who were continually late, so I would always tell them 30 minutes before I get there. Effective technique. Things were worse before mobiles of course, I would wai…
I dunno, in much of southern Europe it's certainly not expected that people will be there to the minute even for one-on-one meetings. Probably not an hour late in that case, but I don't think anybody would bat an eye if you had planned to meet at a coffee shop at 2:00 and someone showed up at 2:15. You'd just get a coffee and read a book or the paper or something. (Being exactly on time, and being angry if someone's 5 minutes late, is seen as a stereotypically "German" sort of thing.)
Re: No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
#14Two potential solutions:
1. Plan around it - be somewhere where the person being late doesn't affect you. Have people meet you at your home or at a cafe where you're doing other work or reading a book and it doesn't adversely affect you. Oftentimes, if I'm traveling with a group of people, I give a time range - "Be there between 7:30PM and 8PM" - that lets the early birds get there at 7:30, and the "oh shoot! gotta run!" people ideally get there by 8PM, but the early birds don't get offended and feel disrespected (I'm more or less an early bird, I hate being late - but I've got some friends and acquaintances who just aren't that way).
2. If you really want to get people to cut it out, make real world consequences. Say "the meeting starts at 9:05 sharp, the doors will be shut and no one will be admitted after that." Think really hard if the situation calls for it, but it does work if you do stuff like that. If you're a professor, you could say to anyone coming in late - "get out. see you next week." You won't have people showing up late if you announce you're going to do that and follow through. Up to you to judge if you want that sort of environment, and you've got to really be on top of things and deliver straight out the gate if you're being hardcore that people have to be there. But it does work.
Re: No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
#15Actually, maybe I'm really busy, and doing the best I can. I value your time, but I value mine more. And obviously you're not as in demand as other people are. Sorry you can't appreciate that.
I used to believe this too. And then I realized that for 99% of cases, the 5 minutes gained is not worth the long-term reputation damage.
Re: No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
#16Interestingly, this is mostly an American (and a also a Western) problem. In most of the world (South America, Middle East, Africa, East Asia, etc), "on time" ranges anywhere between 30 minutes to 3 hours later. We grade our personal productivity level much more than other cultures. Other cultures value other things such as community and relationships at a higher level than we do. A story: I was invited to an Indian…
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Re: No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
#17Personally i find being early more irritating than being late. When someone asks me to meet them at 2pm (eg: Job interview) I'll generally arrive in the vicinity 20-ish minutes early and hang out in a cafe or something and then walk into their office for 2-3 minutes before 2pm.
I've noted some people in my experience to consider this to be late, 15 minutes before stated time is what they consider to be on time. This pisses me off to no end. If you wanted me there at 1:45pm i'd have gladly appeared at that time, just dont say one thing and mean another. GRRRR
Re: No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
#18I also find doctors to be late in perpetuity, ive never in my life waited less than 10 minutes PAST the actual appointment time. This is both an easily identifiable problem and easy to fix, the receptionists could easily structure appointments more appropriately.
Re: No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
#19I get a php error when I visit this page. I guess the server isn't running low on resources, it is rude & selfish. Or maybe just misconfigured :)
Error 403: Forbidden Your PHP settings have been disabled by an H-Sphere administrator.
Your current PHP configuration: --> This configuration was changed: Please bring your PHP configuration in compliance with admin settings or request your administrator to re-enable support of your settings.
You don't have permissions to access this page. This usually means one of the following:
this file and directory permissions make them unavailable from the Internet. .htaccess contains instructions that prevent public access to this file or directory. Please check file and directory permissions and .htaccess configuration if you are able to do this. Otherwise, request your webmaster to grant you access.
Re: No, you are not "running late", you are rude & selfish
#20[deleted]