I think you've not yet found what you love. Try new things and wait until you think about these naturally in the shower. You should force yourself to assume you dont know who you are. It could be surprising. Maybe you should be, say, a hair stylist. Maybe you would dramatically love that. Finding what I love to do worked for me.
Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
21–30 of 382 posts
Re: Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
#22> Am I suffering from some form of undiagnosed ADHD? It's worth looking into this. I know people who found a diagnosis extremely helpful - even those who chose not to avail themselves of the medications available. There's several online questionnaires that would give you an idea of the kind of questions you'd be asked if you went for a consultation. Some of the traits are quiet distinct and you'll have an immediate s…
As someone who suffers from ADD... This. I got formally diagnosed and medication has been nothing short of a miracle worker.
Re: Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
#23I'm in my mid 30s and I think I'm in the middle of the pack as far as productivity/focus/procrastination go. From that perspective and from your own description of yourself, I would put you below average, and much more importantly - your performance is making you unhappy. I think this calls for a self-diagnostic. I would definitely see a therapist and maybe a doctor to make sure there aren't any subtle undiagnosed is…
I think you are right about the mild depression. In my own post further up, I suggested Cognitive Behavioural Therapy as a possible solution (possible to do as self-study and self-practice)
Re: Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
#24You work alone right?
I am hyperproductive when I work in a team because I want to show people who stuff is done within deadline with minimum efforts.
But when I work alone, I lose all motivation. I achieve much less. Even after starting 5 companies.
Re: Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
#25Try meditation. It is proven to increase productivity. I'm not talking about finding spiritual balance and all that hocus-pocus, I'm talking about actively destroying the thought threads that pop up in your head for 5 minutes at the beginning of the day. This will help shape your mind to prevent distractions throughout the day. Some other things that help are planning your next day in the evening, exercise, a good sleep, a good diet, showering, but meditation is the single biggest improvement that you can make.
Re: Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
#26I used to feel that way, but I finally came to terms with the fact that my work-life was a mess, and I was basically lying to myself.
I was working (and struggling, hard, in the way you describe) on a project I was telling myself would become a startup, and even though I felt I was being realistic about the limitations, in retrospect even that was insanely optimistic. I was burning myself out.
Once I had this epiphany - triggered by going to Startup Weekend and having a ton of fun (and no motivational problems!) working on a project, I pulled the plug and eventually got a fairly regular job in a fairly normal company (in an excellent team, though).
The epiphany and pulling the plug had a huge effect. It didn't fix everything overnight, but I did get into a habit of introspection, especially when I'm facing tasks that I struggle to get motivated for. They're still hard, but I am generally able to organise things around them in such a way that they don't get me down.
Re: Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
#27Try to work on projects that are more interesting for you. I almost always have better focus if I work on a job that includes at least one thing, which I am personally interested in.
Re: Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
#28I have always had the exact same problem, sort of dealt with it by doing crazy sprints of work, but recently had a revelation. And I'm in my late 30s.
Try the free course "Learning How To Learn" by Barbara Oakley on Coursera.
It teaches you how to deal with this in the procrastination section. Roughly speaking, it teaches you how to recognize and effectively counter bad habit as well as change your mind set to focus on the process, not the product. For me the process/product bit was the big revelation.
Also, it sort of teaches you that your zombie mode can be used for good, I realized that by trying to have an incredibly flexible life and not have a set routine, I was actually working against one of my best "allies", habits for simple stuff are good, the mind likes routines as it can switch off. Use it to your advantage.
It's not a magic bullet, some days still go wrong, yesterday for example I played a game all day. But the odd thing is, techniques like the podomoro technique have now started working for me with this change in mindset.
I would go through the whole course start to end, it's short and really good. I've picked up several other new ideas and habits from it that are really working for me.
EDIT: Also, I second the therapy too, that's also helped.
Re: Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
#29I'm familiar with this. There's no magic solution, sadly, but I'll share one thing that has helped me and may apply at least to some of your situations. I realised a while ago that my main issue was with nebulous tasks -- that is, the more concrete, defined, and _meetable_ a task was, the less trouble I had with it. So I started to break down large tasks, which never got started much less finished, into smaller ones,…
This is exactly what worked for me - thankfully I learnt it while doing my university dissertation and before I started my career.
You can't start the task "start a business", but you can start the task "determine the market size for x".
Re: Ask HN: Is it 'normal' to struggle so hard with work?
#30I now have the opposite issue! If I’m not working RIGHT NOW, I start to feel anxious, because I should be working. This even stems to when I go home after work, or on the weekends, and so I never really can relax my mind. It’s really unhealthy, and I think I’m going to have to see a professional to help me fix this.