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Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

kapwing.com

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Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#161

Post by Jaruzel »

tim333 wrote: post #143
TheAdamAndChe wrote: post #123

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I am really curious. You say you have used the net for 20 years now, so how can you be surprised about this? Have you not exposed yourself to other anonymous forums? They're all filled with vitriol and disrespect.

As another surprised guy I'm aware people post bad things on the internet but I wasn't aware of the degree of difference between having a male and female picture as I haven't tried that.

Surprised here also (I'm a guy in my 40s; 25 years online) - I know there are people online with no manners, and I go out of my way not to interact with them, but the sheer level of abuse shown here (and sadly elsewhere too) constantly amazes and upsets me.

The obvious thing to do is to remove anonymity from the Internet. However then what do we do about peoples rights[1] to free speech?

---

[1] Not every country gives this right to it's populous.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#162

Post by aninhumer »

Double_a_92 wrote: post #144
jjeaff wrote: post #140

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Since the female photos get a significantly higher level of harrassed, how does this not indicate sexism?

Female photos, especially the second model photo, look incredibly fake. I guess people use that unwanted box to vent to frustations with what seems to be a bot?

The perception that female photos look fake is still sexism. It suggests people believe it less likely that a woman would be on the other end of the conversation. And you suggesting that perception as an explanation without challenging it kind of demonstrates how this is a pervasive problem.

Now I agree that the model photo looks a little more artificial for reasons beyond gender, and they should probably have compared with a male model photo as well. Though personally I suspect people would still think it more likely that an attractive man was a real person than an attractive woman.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#163

Post by jaclaz »

I would tentatively shift the focus on age groups.

I believe (maybe wrongly, raise your hand if you never did this) that any (male) kid in - say the 10-14 age range has made some "harassment", possibly of sexual nature, toward females (not necessarily of the same age group).

Once they were "jokes" or "pranks" on the phone (of very dubious humour but that amused the kids a lot).

I am not particularly surprised that on the internet, a new media where the kids have the same basic "protections" (anonimity and no need to show their appearances) the "tradition" continues.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#164

Post by salvar »

guy98238710 wrote: post #84
throwaway613834 wrote: post #24

Honest question: What's the logic behind being so utterly rude from the first moment to someone you find attractive? Is it supposed to attract them back somehow?

Actually, people are colder and more abusive towards those less good-looking. The case described in the article is not due to beauty. It's because people think it's a bot or at least a fake photo. That's what irritates them.

Did you speak to the people in question or are you just speculating on the reason for their behaviour?

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#166

Post by salvar »

tomlock wrote: post #2

How many more instances of this happening do we need before people believe there's actually a problem in society surrounding sexism? Honestly I expect to see equivocation more than indictment in the comments section here.

There always seems to be a good crowd of people that start with the assumption that there is actually no problem in society with sexism, and therefore there must be some other explanation. That's when the "But what if" and "Maybe the sample was" get dragged out.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#167

Post by reitanqild »

guy98238710 wrote: post #132
TaylorAlexander wrote: post #128

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I’ve heard that before. Guys will get aggressive if a woman ignores them. I don’t get it and it’s sketchy as hell. It shows how superficial so many guys can be - they want to sound sweet until it’s clear they’re not getting anything, and then they become aggressive. It’s always about their satisfaction - they reveal that they were not being nice in order for the woman to feel better, or they wouldn’t have turned aggr…

Actually anger is a normal reaction to frustration, not to mention to the rude rejection. It shows how the society is broken. Wolves prey on the streets for trusting victims. They won't listen to polite no. People learn to just walk away quietly without saying anything polite. Wolves don't mind it, but ordinary people find such silent treatment infuriating. They respond with more rudeness back.

Ignoring someone in the street is not a rude rejection.

Also I'd expect ordinary people to handle a rejection like that without any problems. (I'm born in Europe and spent most of my time in Europe but would expect this to be the same in North America based on the few times I've worked there.)

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#168

Post by salvar »

b6 wrote: post #72
mattbee wrote: post #62

Earlier quoted context omitted.

> I think it's much closer to the truth to say that people everywhere are extremely interested in and enamored of women, but that women provide some kind of easy target for expression of bad feelings or trolling. You're not even convincing yourself here, dude. If you feel that women just are an outlet for your bad feelings, and you somehow can't keep a lid on that - you're a misogynist, whatever the shade.

> If you feel that women just are an outlet for your bad feelings, and you somehow can't keep a lid on that - you're a misogynist Do bullies mistreat other kids because they hate children?

Wait, are bullies then mistreating others because they really like them and are just trolling?

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#169

Post by dkersten »

guy98238710 wrote: post #132
TaylorAlexander wrote: post #128

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I’ve heard that before. Guys will get aggressive if a woman ignores them. I don’t get it and it’s sketchy as hell. It shows how superficial so many guys can be - they want to sound sweet until it’s clear they’re not getting anything, and then they become aggressive. It’s always about their satisfaction - they reveal that they were not being nice in order for the woman to feel better, or they wouldn’t have turned aggr…

Actually anger is a normal reaction to frustration, not to mention to the rude rejection. It shows how the society is broken. Wolves prey on the streets for trusting victims. They won't listen to polite no. People learn to just walk away quietly without saying anything polite. Wolves don't mind it, but ordinary people find such silent treatment infuriating. They respond with more rudeness back.

> rude rejection

Are you serious? There is nothing rude about it, she didn’t owe that random stranger anything and it was incredibly rude of him to make unwanted and unsolicited advancements. Yelling “cutie” and “sexy” at a stranger is incredibly rude.

Re: Why I don't use my real photo when messaging with customers on my website

#170

Post by jacobush »

guy98238710 wrote: post #132
TaylorAlexander wrote: post #128

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I’ve heard that before. Guys will get aggressive if a woman ignores them. I don’t get it and it’s sketchy as hell. It shows how superficial so many guys can be - they want to sound sweet until it’s clear they’re not getting anything, and then they become aggressive. It’s always about their satisfaction - they reveal that they were not being nice in order for the woman to feel better, or they wouldn’t have turned aggr…

Actually anger is a normal reaction to frustration, not to mention to the rude rejection. It shows how the society is broken. Wolves prey on the streets for trusting victims. They won't listen to polite no. People learn to just walk away quietly without saying anything polite. Wolves don't mind it, but ordinary people find such silent treatment infuriating. They respond with more rudeness back.

Ordinary people say - Go away you ugly bitch!

Got it.

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