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The CLARA Method of De-Escalation

calimac.dreamwidth.org

11–20 of 76 posts

Re: The CLARA Method of De-Escalation

#11
I can totally relate to this from both perspectives (being pissed off at someone, and trying to calm somebody pissed off) and seeing how both approaches work/dont work.

Not too long ago I opened a dispute with Ryanair about what I thought was quite obvious their own issue for which I should be refunded (I provided screenshots and everything). I've reached out to their customer support expecting to raise a simple issue that should result in a quick solution on their end. I was shocked to see their support behaving in a very defensive and completely dismissive way that resulted in a 2 hour long support case that didn't really fix anything (they still have the same bug on their website, and I was not refunded). These guys basically upgraded me from 'slightly annoyed' to 'never again will I fly ryanair' kind of customer.

In another case, I've reached out to an online chocolate vendor to point out an issue I had with their shipping carrier. I knew it was not directly the vendor's fault, but this being their only shipping method I figured they should be aware as it is a constant problem. These guys acknowledged my frustrations immediately and even offered a symbolic gift card as a way of apologizing for an issue that they can't really fix any time soon. I was generally happy to see them even acknowledging my problem, and in turn completely understood that this was out of their hands. I continue to be their customer even though the shipping is still a pain.

I also have a local ad to help my father sell some stuff he makes by hand. As its a hand made thing that he makes in large quantities, mistakes happen every now and then and I get complaints. I try to be understanding of every issue they raise and offer urgent refunds/replacements to anyone affected. Even though people get pissed off they didnt get what they expected, everyone responded much better if I used similar methods of de-escalation.

People are often (and understandably) very impulsive and rude when they feel they are being wronged. We should try to be more understanding of these emotions and work towards solving the issue instead of taking it so personally.

Re: The CLARA Method of De-Escalation

#12
post #8

I'd be interested to see how this works in dealing with bad reviews. They often feel disenfranchised/slighted/wronged and not a few, angry. I've been pretty effective in dealing with bad reviews for our app and lots of this method resonates with me. As I'm systematizing the company a key area is putting in a process and tools for the team to handle bad reviews rather than me. So far however, it seems each situation a…

> So far however, it seems each situation and personality makes it difficult to pin down an effective process. Well, obviously: using one-process-fits-all without appreciating local context is a recipe for disaster, isn't it?

Everything can have a process. A process doesn't eliminate skill and judgement but establishes standards and guidance leading to improvement.

Re: The CLARA Method of De-Escalation

#13
post #8

I'd be interested to see how this works in dealing with bad reviews. They often feel disenfranchised/slighted/wronged and not a few, angry. I've been pretty effective in dealing with bad reviews for our app and lots of this method resonates with me. As I'm systematizing the company a key area is putting in a process and tools for the team to handle bad reviews rather than me. So far however, it seems each situation a…

Regarding bad reviews, I feel for you. I am close to someone who is a good person, but seems unable to stop himself from leaving scathing reviews. If it's any consolation, I really believe that 1) trauma he experienced at a young age contributes to this behavior and 2) if he knew the person who produced the product and understood the difficulties they faced during its production, he would not do it.

Re: The CLARA Method of De-Escalation

#15

Coincidentally on the frontpage together with the rant of Linus Torvalds

I feel that most conflict resolution comes down to finding a compromise - like, you get reimbursed or something. For code and the Linux kernel though, there's little room for compromise - half of a shit patch is still shit. So to speak. It's an effective means of leadership if you're in a position where you don't need to make compromises.

Re: The CLARA Method of De-Escalation

#17
post #13
post #8

I'd be interested to see how this works in dealing with bad reviews. They often feel disenfranchised/slighted/wronged and not a few, angry. I've been pretty effective in dealing with bad reviews for our app and lots of this method resonates with me. As I'm systematizing the company a key area is putting in a process and tools for the team to handle bad reviews rather than me. So far however, it seems each situation a…

Regarding bad reviews, I feel for you. I am close to someone who is a good person, but seems unable to stop himself from leaving scathing reviews. If it's any consolation, I really believe that 1) trauma he experienced at a young age contributes to this behavior and 2) if he knew the person who produced the product and understood the difficulties they faced during its production, he would not do it.

I don't understand - do you think it's wrong to leave a critical review? Why should be stop himself leaving them if the product was bad? And whatever difficulties caused a product to be bad are irrelevant in a review of the product. People just want to know if it's bad or not.

Re: The CLARA Method of De-Escalation

#19
post #13
post #8

I'd be interested to see how this works in dealing with bad reviews. They often feel disenfranchised/slighted/wronged and not a few, angry. I've been pretty effective in dealing with bad reviews for our app and lots of this method resonates with me. As I'm systematizing the company a key area is putting in a process and tools for the team to handle bad reviews rather than me. So far however, it seems each situation a…

Regarding bad reviews, I feel for you. I am close to someone who is a good person, but seems unable to stop himself from leaving scathing reviews. If it's any consolation, I really believe that 1) trauma he experienced at a young age contributes to this behavior and 2) if he knew the person who produced the product and understood the difficulties they faced during its production, he would not do it.

This is a really odd statement. I occasionally leave scathing reviews if I've had a genuinely bad experience. Most recently it was with a smart speaker (the UE Blast) that was obviously rushed to a Christmas 2017 release with major software issues that, according to their forums, are hitting many customers with no or poor response from the vendor.

As a software engineer I can imagine the circumstances around the rushing of the product before the software was finished, and can empathise, but ultimately (pun unintended) nothing will change (and more people will waste their time buying and returning the device) unless the company realises their products are getting worse.

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