"The lead officer came and told me that they were not arresting me - there was no indication that I was negligent or distracted or impaired in any way - but he gave me a little lecture saying, "This child died, that's a terrible thing, you need to make sure that you never do this again."" Was I the only one shocked by this? I mean, a little kid died and she's not arrested at least to conduct an investigation? How did…
IMO, the only person to blame in this incident is the person that thought a 50mph speed limit was appropriate for a road that kids live on.
The day I accidentally killed a little boy
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Re: The day I accidentally killed a little boy
#92I have 4 boys under the age of 12. I would say I think about one of them dying (accident, sickness, murder...so many ways it can happen...) multiple times a day. I know that sounds morbid, and it probably is, but my brain does it on its own...not a lot of control over it. Nothing on earth scares me more than the idea of having to go on living without one of them. Having 4 increases my odds that I might have to. It te…
On the other hand, having more of them decreases your odds that you will face losing all of them. Imagine how parents live who had just one child, who died.
Re: The day I accidentally killed a little boy
#93Earlier quoted context omitted.
Same and this is a really good idea
Non-parent here. I’m surprised to hear calls for a Netflix “safe space” from adults on HN rather than from whiny kids at a liberal arts college. It’s obvious that you’re sincere and that becoming a parent has affected you profoundly.
Re: The day I accidentally killed a little boy
#94Earlier quoted context omitted.
This is just back of the envelope math here, but I think it will cost the US a significant amount more dollars per fatality reduction. We have a huge number more cars and a very different culture and driving mindset. One relative small country with a pretty singular culture and a much, much smaller amount of roads is just going to have an easier time addressing the issue. It is still worth pursuing, but the scale of…
If the US has more cars per capita and more fatalities per capita, that increases the denominator , meaning that these policies would be cheaper per fatality and per car than they are in Sweden.
Re: The day I accidentally killed a little boy
#95I have 4 boys under the age of 12. I would say I think about one of them dying (accident, sickness, murder...so many ways it can happen...) multiple times a day. I know that sounds morbid, and it probably is, but my brain does it on its own...not a lot of control over it. Nothing on earth scares me more than the idea of having to go on living without one of them. Having 4 increases my odds that I might have to. It te…
On the other hand, having more of them decreases your odds that you will face losing all of them. Imagine how parents live who had just one child, who died.
Re: The day I accidentally killed a little boy
#96"The lead officer came and told me that they were not arresting me - there was no indication that I was negligent or distracted or impaired in any way - but he gave me a little lecture saying, "This child died, that's a terrible thing, you need to make sure that you never do this again."" Was I the only one shocked by this? I mean, a little kid died and she's not arrested at least to conduct an investigation? How did…
And yeah, I don’t think the fragility of the agent of death is a reason not to conduct even a cursory investigation into whether there might have been factors related to the crash.
Was there anything in the car that might indictate impairment or distraction? Was there something about the place in the roadway that limited visibility? Might she have been speeding, and might speeding have been a factor?
I mean, yes, some crashes are truly accidental, but some (especially nowadays with digital distractions) aren’t exactly without culpability on the part of the driver.
When I was in college a beloved professor of mine was struck by a man who got out of his pickup truck, looked around, and got back in his truck and drove off. My professor was left injured in the middle of the road only to be struck and killed by a second car. The first driver’s defense? The one that absolved him of all criminal and civil liability to my professor’s surviving child? He didn’t see her.
In this country we are pretty quick to assume innocence on the part of the driver. It’s been said that, if you want to kill someone and get away with it, do it with your car.
So, yeah, this woman probably wouldn’t have been convicted by a jury of her peers. But it’s pretty cavalier to suggest that we—out of deference to the operator of a deadly machine—that we shouldn’t even ask some questions.
Re: The day I accidentally killed a little boy
#97Re: The day I accidentally killed a little boy
#98If someone fires a gun randomly down the street, not aiming at anyone, but happens to hit someone, they'd certainly be arrested. Drive a multi-thousand-pound projectile down the street, kill someone, and it's just an "accident". The default needs to move to charging every driver involved in a fatal crash with manslaughter. Currently the police won't even perform basic investigative work that would make any charge pos…
Re: The day I accidentally killed a little boy
#99You have to feel terribly sad for everyone involved here. The only place the blame can rest is humanity's desire to mix very fast, solid vehicles with very slow, squishy pedestrians in the same spaces. We're way too far down that rabbit-hole to address it, but hopefully self-driving cars (and less polluting cars, too) will start to reverse the damage done by the automobile, in the not-too distant future.
Re: The day I accidentally killed a little boy
#100Earlier quoted context omitted.
There have been studies on this. Your life (well, chance at ever being happy again) is effectively ruined by the death of one child, regardless of how many you have. You never stop loving or missing the one that died.
It’s terrifying. The other day my youngest started crying and screaming cuz his stomach hurt (ended up being gas or upset stomach that lasted for 4-5 hours). My brain instantly went to “well that’s it...”...it almost always goes through worst case first. I literally can’t imagine how hard it is on parent’s whose kids are actually sick, suffering so badly, and then may end up dying. I don’t know...I’m not sure I’m mad…