Why Am I So Lazy?
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Why Am I So Lazy?
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Re: Why Am I So Lazy?
#2When I was failing classes in college, I had a conversation with a dean who suggested that I subconsciously didn't want to be there, and that I was committing academic self-sabotage as a result. This struck me as an extravagant, bizarre theory. (Cynically, I also wonder if she was trying to convince me to voluntarily leave the college so that I wouldn't ding their graduation rate.)
I tend to be suspicious of this kind of move, where what seems like a character flaw is explained away as something more benign. In the article in question, the author suggests that the woman writing in is not really lazy, but has been holding back out of fear that she might disappoint herself. But why can't she just be lazy? I don't doubt that there are people who have the kind of subtle psychology that the author suggests. But I wonder if we're too eager to accept such explanations because they are more comforting than more straightforward, harsher ones.
Re: Why Am I So Lazy?
#3I'm not sure how this got here, but wow, Heather Havrilesky is still around.
She wrote for Suck in the early days of the web.
Re: Why Am I So Lazy?
#4When I was failing classes in college, I had a conversation with a dean who suggested that I subconsciously didn't want to be there, and that I was committing academic self-sabotage as a result. This struck me as an extravagant, bizarre theory. (Cynically, I also wonder if she was trying to convince me to voluntarily leave the college so that I wouldn't ding their graduation rate.) I tend to be suspicious of this kin…
I agree. There are lots of psychological things at work more plausible than not wanting to succeed. (Short attention span, getting sucked into online dopamine rushes, etc)
Re: Why Am I So Lazy?
#5When I was failing classes in college, I had a conversation with a dean who suggested that I subconsciously didn't want to be there, and that I was committing academic self-sabotage as a result. This struck me as an extravagant, bizarre theory. (Cynically, I also wonder if she was trying to convince me to voluntarily leave the college so that I wouldn't ding their graduation rate.) I tend to be suspicious of this kin…
So why were you failing classes in college?
Re: Why Am I So Lazy?
#6When I was failing classes in college, I had a conversation with a dean who suggested that I subconsciously didn't want to be there, and that I was committing academic self-sabotage as a result. This struck me as an extravagant, bizarre theory. (Cynically, I also wonder if she was trying to convince me to voluntarily leave the college so that I wouldn't ding their graduation rate.) I tend to be suspicious of this kin…
I suppose she first asked you about the underperformance and was not satisfied with the answer. It wouldn’t be a bizarre theory if she saw sufficient intelligence along with a lack of personal investment, in fact it would be a quite reasonable guess.
Re: Why Am I So Lazy?
#7From the little "Sloth" wrote, it sounds like it's possible she might have undiagnosed ADHD.
As someone with ADHD myself, I instantly recognized the inability to get myself to start working on something until the last minute (even if I really, really want to do it) and the piles clothes (despite my propensity for cleanliness). Another hallmark of ADHD that many don't know about is bursts of almost manic productivity for random tasks or when under extreme pressure.
If she does have ADHD, Polly's answer is both unhelpful and somewhat dangerous.
Re: Why Am I So Lazy?
#8When I was failing classes in college, I had a conversation with a dean who suggested that I subconsciously didn't want to be there, and that I was committing academic self-sabotage as a result. This struck me as an extravagant, bizarre theory. (Cynically, I also wonder if she was trying to convince me to voluntarily leave the college so that I wouldn't ding their graduation rate.) I tend to be suspicious of this kin…
Maybe the word 'lazy' is itself a lazy way to describe the behaviors arising from biological factors beyond our control? Maybe medication is in order.
Re: Why Am I So Lazy?
#9'I divide my officers into four groups. There are clever, diligent, stupid, and lazy officers. Usually two characteristics are combined. Some are clever and diligent -- their place is the General Staff. The next lot are stupid and lazy -- they make up 90 percent of every army and are suited to routine duties. Anyone who is both clever and lazy is qualified for the highest leadership duties, because he possesses the intellectual clarity and the composure necessary for difficult decisions. One must beware of anyone who is stupid and diligent -- he must not be entrusted with any responsibility because he will always cause only mischief.'
-- Kurt Freiherr von Hammerstein-Equord (1878-1943), Commander-in-Chief of the Reichswehr
Re: Why Am I So Lazy?
#10I wish this advice mentioned the importance of ruling out issues like ADHD first, especially the inattentive type which is often underdiagnosed in women. I really relate to OPs description, and if she does have an exectutive functioning disorder that makes task prioritization inadequate and non-stimulating activities unrewarding to a massive extent, it wont be simply a matter of "overcoming fear" to start directing herself in a way that is more satisfying. If anything, it's a recipe for depression and frustration to try to act on advice like this if you have untreated ADHD.