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Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

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Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#211

Post by [deleted] »

ashark wrote: post #73
westmeal wrote: post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

If your parents had eliminated screens when you were very young (including theirs) save maybe one publicly-placed crappy terminal for wikipedia or looking up business hours or maps or learning you some programming or whatever, but loosened the reigns on hang-outs and travel, do you think you'd have still felt isolated because all your friends were still online most of the time? Asking as a parent with three young kid…

[deleted]

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#212

Post by jjawssd »

vasilipupkin wrote: post #198
vasilipupkin wrote: post #84

Earlier quoted context omitted.

why am I getting all these downvotes? clearly, it's much safer for a teenager to ride the train in the Netherlands from one end to the other, than to do a similar thing in Chicago, let's say. So, yeah, it's not that impressive.

so why more downvotes? can someone explain to me the logic of what exactly you are disagreeing with?

Don't take it personally. You won't get many warm replies from American city dwellers for pointing out the failures of their communities.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#213

Post by francisofascii »

mac01021 wrote: post #176
dragonwriter wrote: post #38

Earlier quoted context omitted.

This is definitely true, and driven in part by media-driven hysteria that has led to the decades of the perception that child abduction and similar child targeting crimes are on the rise, while the reverse has been the case.

I'm not afraid of roving child snatchers. I'm afraid of all the cars that might accidentally run over a kid.

Right, cars just go too fast in residential neighborhoods. And the neighborhoods these days are built to encourage speeding. (wide, long stretches without stop signs, etc)

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#214

Post by naasking »

Analemma_ wrote: post #130
toyg wrote: post #117

Earlier quoted context omitted.

That’s the thing: I’m very tempted to let my kids roam the neighborhood, like I did in Italy in the 80s. Where we live now, streets are pretty tight and have speed bumps, so it’s fairly safe. But if anybody gets nosey and calls child protection, I’m in a world of hurt from which I’ll probably never emerge. Yet another bit of the world ruined by Sun and Daily Mail.

> But if anybody gets nosey and calls child protection, I’m in a world of hurt from which I’ll probably never emerge. I think this is a really overblown fear. Yeah, everyone "totally heard about someone" who had CPS called on them because they let their kid roam around, but I think this is mostly an urban legend about as likely as a terrorist attack. CPS usually has way more on their plate than they can handle with a…

> CPS usually has way more on their plate than they can handle with actual issues

Except they are required by law to follow-up on all reports. So you will be interviewed and inconvenienced at the very least.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#215

Post by kraig911 »

ashark wrote: post #73
westmeal wrote: post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

If your parents had eliminated screens when you were very young (including theirs) save maybe one publicly-placed crappy terminal for wikipedia or looking up business hours or maps or learning you some programming or whatever, but loosened the reigns on hang-outs and travel, do you think you'd have still felt isolated because all your friends were still online most of the time? Asking as a parent with three young kid…

I'm a father of an autistic 4 year old girl. Removing screens entirely from her has caused her to develop language and sleep better. I can't say why or how but I highly recommend just avoiding screens (including TV's). The hardest thing too I think causing all this is us as parents tend to hover much more than our parents did to us.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#216

Post by virgil_disgr4ce »

bastijn wrote: post #136
losteverything wrote: post #113

Earlier quoted context omitted.

My kid tells us we did her/him a big disservice by just who were were: an in love couple with a good marriage. She/he tells us ahe/he was so unprepared for relationships and the knowledge that others' sid not come from our style home (happy marriage filled with love, imo) Now how does one predict that??? Introduce my kids to broken marriages?

Offtopic: are we now so gender neutral we even cannot address our own kid as he or she? Or did you do this on purpose to hide the gender of your kid as part of your privacy? No flame intended. Honest question. Never thought about the gender of my kids being a privacy thing. Ontopic: As a parent I (we) try not to restrain things like screen use. Instead we actively promote all other forms of spending time we prefer mo…

What's wrong with gender neutrality?

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#217

Post by pavel_lishin »

13of40 wrote: post #106
pavel_lishin wrote: post #53

Earlier quoted context omitted.

America is a wholly different place. I was born in the mid-80s in Moscow, Russia, and moved to America when I was ten. Before I moved, I was regularly taking the subway, with transfers, to school - by myself. Here in America, I had a coworker a few years ago who literally would not let his double-digit-aged children cross the street to school by themselves. It's a weird fuckin' place.

I'm an American. At the age of 13 my dad bought me a motorcycle that I used to ride around in the desert while he was at work. By 16 I was basically living alone. My kid, on the other hand, is 13 right now, and while he can code some pretty mean Minecraft mods, he doesn't even know how to do the dishes or get to school on his own. (Coincidentally, his mother is from Moscow, Russia and used to regularly take the subwa…

This is going to sound pretty harsh, but I don't think you can blame Minecraft, suburban sprawl, or broadband for your 13 year old not knowing how to do the dishes.

Not knowing how to get to school? Fair enough, maybe it really is implausible for him to get to school on his own - I don't know your local geography. My wife grew up in Plano, TX; there was a big highway between her and her high school, which was also miles away. At the time, Plano didn't really have a public bus system to speak of, and she didn't have a bike - walking five miles isn't a very good option. She would know how to get there, but there was no reason to do it aside from school bus or her parents driving.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#218

Post by dawhizkid »

Symbiote wrote: post #161
dawhizkid wrote: post #61

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Outside of a pub (which is a bar?) none of these places would typically be open on a late Fri/Sat. I think there's plenty of opportunity to reinvent the nightlife experience in a way that hasn't been done yet. Hopefully in a few years you can decide between a bar, club, or ____ at 12am on a Friday night. The idea of being sandwiched in the middle of loud drunk sweaty people in a place where I can barely hear what som…

A pub or inn in British usage tends to have quiet or no music, and enough seats for people to sit. They're the original board games café: you'll probably find darts or a similar game, and at the quieter ones copies of Scrabble, chess, draughts or packs of cards. But as was mentioned, the board game café in Copenhagen is open until 2 on Friday and Saturday nights: https://bastardcafe.dk/opening-hours-and-events/

Ah yeah that's it.

I think just as we're seeing the rise of niche co-working spaces for women/LGBT some enterprising introvert will create a new category of nightlife that is fun, open, not crazy loud, and not necessarily centered around alcohol. We've reinvented work but we've regressed when it comes to socializing IMO.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#219

Post by deadmetheny »

dawhizkid wrote: post #61
Guest9812398 wrote: post #51

Earlier quoted context omitted.

I think there are lots of options. 1. Board game venues. They're becoming more popular, and yes, they exist in the US. I would be surprised if there wasn't one in any major US city. 2. Escape rooms. I think there are at least 50 in my city. They're literally everywhere if I search on Google Maps. 3. Cafes. If you're looking for something low key, you should be able to find some cafes with some hot wine, snacks, and c…

Outside of a pub (which is a bar?) none of these places would typically be open on a late Fri/Sat. I think there's plenty of opportunity to reinvent the nightlife experience in a way that hasn't been done yet. Hopefully in a few years you can decide between a bar, club, or ____ at 12am on a Friday night. The idea of being sandwiched in the middle of loud drunk sweaty people in a place where I can barely hear what som…

A pub is not a bar. The only real similarity is that a pub and a bar both serve alcohol. The atmosphere is completely different. I suspect this may not be abundantly clear to a lot of Americans, who seem to lack exposure to a true European style pub.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#220

Post by rdlecler1 »

kraig911 wrote: post #215
ashark wrote: post #73

Earlier quoted context omitted.

If your parents had eliminated screens when you were very young (including theirs) save maybe one publicly-placed crappy terminal for wikipedia or looking up business hours or maps or learning you some programming or whatever, but loosened the reigns on hang-outs and travel, do you think you'd have still felt isolated because all your friends were still online most of the time? Asking as a parent with three young kid…

I'm a father of an autistic 4 year old girl. Removing screens entirely from her has caused her to develop language and sleep better. I can't say why or how but I highly recommend just avoiding screens (including TV's). The hardest thing too I think causing all this is us as parents tend to hover much more than our parents did to us.

How do you disentangle this from normal development? It could be like taking vitamin C to cure a cold?
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