Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore • Hacker News Board

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#91

Post by dragonwriter » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:30 PM UTC

cutler wrote: post #87

Society is sick, let's face it, and technology is largely to blame. We just can't see the danger in technology so long as we're blinded by everything shiny. Human beings are primarily social beings and no, that does not mean peering at each other through the alienating window of a mobile phone screen. In 1969, at the age of 9, I could be left to play with my friends and wander several miles from home without any sens…

> Society is sick, let's face it, and technology is largely to blame.

Technology is never to blame for anything, because technology is not a moral actor; people may be to blame for the manner in which they use technology.

OTOH, people have been falsely conflating “the youth of today seem to have a different lifestyle than I preferred in my youth” with “society is sick” for at least as long as we have historical evidence of what people thought.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#92

Post by kenning » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:34 PM UTC

TurboHaskal wrote: post #45

I understand it to a degree. I've personally never liked partying; hated the music and the culture around alcohol and only did it in order to get girls. There are more efficient ways today.

Didn't realize it until this comment, but you're right. Tinder really made hooking up a lot more efficient, and finding mates was the only reason I had to go out after I was ~23.

Apparently the use of tinder in the NBA is actually making a big impact on away teams' sleep schedules. http://www.espn.com/nba/story/_/page/presents18969358/tinder...

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#93

Post by losteverything » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:35 PM UTC

ashark wrote: post #73

westmeal wrote: post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

If your parents had eliminated screens when you were very young (including theirs) save maybe one publicly-placed crappy terminal for wikipedia or looking up business hours or maps or learning you some programming or whatever, but loosened the reigns on hang-outs and travel, do you think you'd have still felt isolated because all your friends were still online most of the time? Asking as a parent with three young kid…

You will screw up your kids just like your parents screwed you up.... You just don't know how yet. But it isn't really screwed up... It is called parenting.

Then when u become a grandparent it begins to totally make sense....we all screw up our kids...teaching thwm how to recover is the real deal

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#94

Post by Analemma_ » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:36 PM UTC

ashark wrote: post #73

westmeal wrote: post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

If your parents had eliminated screens when you were very young (including theirs) save maybe one publicly-placed crappy terminal for wikipedia or looking up business hours or maps or learning you some programming or whatever, but loosened the reigns on hang-outs and travel, do you think you'd have still felt isolated because all your friends were still online most of the time? Asking as a parent with three young kid…

Keep in mind that if the OP is 21, then "when s/he was very young" would've been circa 2000. That was before smartphones or even Wi-Fi, where you pretty much had to be seated at a desk to use a computer, which is very different from the situation now. This is an epidemic that snuck up on us.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#95

Post by GuiA » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:36 PM UTC

dilap wrote: post #72

dawhizkid wrote: post #22

I wonder why the "young adult nightlife experience" feels so stagnant. I like going to the occasional upscale cocktail bar, but in general spending Friday or Saturday night in a crowded bar or club is not my idea of a fun thing to do. What is the alternative for more introverted people? Stay home? I went to Copenhagen recently and on a Friday night came across a big coffee/beer+wine place with lots of tables/sofas th…

i feel this. (in SF.) i think it's extra bad here in SF because most people have really small apts, so not great for getting a group together at a house. end up in kinda-shitty over-priced bars. meh. (there's probably cooler places/things going on and i just haven't discovered them. maybe?)

There are a few niche venues, but overall yeah I agree with your assessment. One compounding factor is that public transportation in SF has terrible coverage, stops early, and just kind of sucks all around. In Tokyo or Paris, spending the night with a friend who lives a few kilometers away is not a problem. In SF, if you live in the mission and your friend is in the sunset, you’re probably not going to hang out together that often.

There’s Lyft/Uber, but they’re a bit pricey, and you’re just contributing to a slimy system and not doing anything to help public transit.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#96

Post by workthrowaway27 » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:36 PM UTC

tulipmania wrote: post #80

Frankly this is totally case by case. I’m 22 and have been partying hard since 15. Simultaneous to that my career hasn’t been a distraction or a replacement. It would make sense that the support on a developer driven channel like Hacker News would sway the kids who hang inside more. I promise you HN, kids are partying hard.

It's about population trends, not individuals.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#97

Post by Apocryphon » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:38 PM UTC

dilap wrote: post #72

dawhizkid wrote: post #22

I wonder why the "young adult nightlife experience" feels so stagnant. I like going to the occasional upscale cocktail bar, but in general spending Friday or Saturday night in a crowded bar or club is not my idea of a fun thing to do. What is the alternative for more introverted people? Stay home? I went to Copenhagen recently and on a Friday night came across a big coffee/beer+wine place with lots of tables/sofas th…

i feel this. (in SF.) i think it's extra bad here in SF because most people have really small apts, so not great for getting a group together at a house. end up in kinda-shitty over-priced bars. meh. (there's probably cooler places/things going on and i just haven't discovered them. maybe?)

Go to Urban Putt.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#98

Post by code_duck » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:39 PM UTC

pavel_lishin wrote: post #53

the-dude wrote: post #21

Earlier quoted context omitted.

Here you have a 'counterdote' : I am 43. After the first year of high school ( I was 13 ), we were allowed to travel to the other side of the country by train, sleep in a youth hostel and return at the end of the next day. This is NL, the other side of the country is only 350km. When we tell younger friends, they refuse to believe.

America is a wholly different place. I was born in the mid-80s in Moscow, Russia, and moved to America when I was ten. Before I moved, I was regularly taking the subway, with transfers, to school - by myself. Here in America, I had a coworker a few years ago who literally would not let his double-digit-aged children cross the street to school by themselves. It's a weird fuckin' place.

When I was growing up in the 80s in the US, I would

- walk and bike around the block by myself when I was 7

- walk to the stores 1.5 miles away when I was 9, sometimes with my 3 yr older brother

- explore the irrigation ditches behind my house when I was 10

- skate down to the mall when I was 13

My parents warned me that the guy across the street with a VW van was 'weird' and might molest me, but didn't try to restrict me much.

I also played my share of Sega games and learned to program on an Amiga and C64, so I was even a bit of a homebody compared to many kids. I can only imagine how dull my childhood would have been if I was barely allowed to leave the house. It amazes me how little people trust their children and society these days.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#99

Post by narag » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:41 PM UTC

noelwelsh wrote: post #10

vinceguidry wrote: post #2

I have a theory that introversion and extraversion don't really exist as personality traits, and that we build up preferences out of existing culture about how much social interaction we want in our daily lives. If the culture changes, then so will our preferences. I can easily imagine a world in which I'm gregarious and fun all the time. Making that world happen on the other hand...

Having seen how much more sociable the Spanish are compared to the English I'm inclined to agree there is a significant cultural component here. This could be just genetic, but I believe it isn't. A very quick search suggests this is something that academia is considering and has not answered definitively.

Having seen how much more sociable the Spanish are compared to the English

I can atest that there are many Spanish introverts. In a very open society you must make an extra effort to fit, but that doesn't change such a traits. My father used to push me very hard to go out and meet people. Annoying at the time, but I'm happy he did.

Re: Teens Aren’t Partying Anymore

#100

Post by 659087 » Wed, Jan 03, 2018, 5:42 PM UTC

westmeal wrote: post #9

I know, I know this is anecdotal 'evidence'. I happen to be 21 which fits me right in this generation and the main reason this occurs is due to parenting. My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17. By that time I was completely and utterly addicted to computing to just let go and 'hang out'. As a matter in fact most of my friends are online rather than 4 real friends in real life. It…

> My parents wouldn't let me go _anywhere_ by myself until I was at least 17

The sad thing is, your story seems to be the rule and not the exception these days. I fear for a future run by people who grew up being constantly sheltered and hidden away from the world around them, while being "raised" by Facebook/Google/etc.

I hope these parents are prepared to keep taking care of their "kids" well into their 30s, because no kid who was kept locked up until age 18 is going to be anywhere near prepared to venture out on their own before then.