“I see a lot of men leading people on, sleeping with a dozen women at the same time. But if each of the dozen women doesn’t care, is there any crime committed? You could say it’s disgusting but not illegal—it just perpetuates a culture that keeps women down.” How does it keep women down? Sleeping with a guy is a built in option women have to better their lives, that men don't have. Otherwise they're just like the res…
"Something you can pay with" and "something you're expected to pay with or you're out" can describe the same asset, but are much more driven by the relative power of the person being paid. We tend to honor the former (as you do) until it becomes the latter (as it mostly seems actually is when it's allowed).